would you finish with someone if...

[ImABadGirl]

they had a very small willy and was rubbish in bed.

Is this shallow or just facing reality that sex is actually quite a fundamental part of a relationship?

Well, it depends a bit if "rubbish" felt salvageable. If you fancy the bloke, can you suspend disbelief while you train him up advise him how to please you better?

Small willy though, not much you can do about that. Especially when combined with ageing fanjo.

Small willy and good at oral would be fine by me. Small willy and no other skills wouldn't.

Sorry, that sounds like I'm saying you have an ageing fanjo

I mean in the sense that all fanjos, alas, age.

Yes.

I wouldn't fancy him if he wasn't up to snuff. Small willy, fine, poor skils, bye bye.

did fancy like crazy but got in the bedroom and felt massively disappointed, he was nervous and couldn't get it up went rapidly downhill from there

Oh interesting, the small willy would definitely be the sticking point for me.

I haven't got a bucket by any stretch of the imagination

Hm, was it just nerves? Depends a bit what the follow up is. I had one of these once, and I didn't mind when he was nervous the first time, but he didn't seem particularly keen to try again either (next morning/day etc). So yes, I dumped.

It would depend on his other skills and his ability to appreciate and be appreciated.

As long as his is also a really nice caring person along with his small willy of course.

we tried a good few times, it got worse each time we tried, then I jumped on him and we managed it I didn't feel it go in I think the damage was done, once in the space of 4 weeks

What about other areas or aides vibrator

Yeah, that doesn't sound promising.

I was worried that I was being shallow as he is a lovely bloke, but I do like a good sized willy, something I never thought I would type right there

I have my bits pierced and it's very easy for me to...ahem be pleasured

No, I think if it doesn't work for you, it doesn't work. I wouldn't be happy with just oral sex, vibrator, blah blah. No point pretending otherwise.

thank you madbuslady, you have made me feel a bit better, breaking up is never easy, it's been over 2 weeks since I binned him and he's still asking why

I have binned for smallness. And also weirdness. There are more weird willys out there than you'd think.

Oh dear, don't tell the poor sod, will you! He just needs someone who can take or leave willies, he'll be fine.

I don't have any intention of telling him, he will be ok, willys are a bit weird looking

I wouldn't dump for a small willy. And I wouldn't dump for bad in bed, if he was willing to make improvements.

But I've been with too many men who are shit, know it and couldn't give a toss. I.e. as long as they get their orgasm they don't care if it's just pump-pump-squirt despite me hinting/asking/demanding more.

One particularly lovely man said I must have something wrong with me if I couldn't come with a 17.5 second bit of PIV

But it sounds like you make the right choice for you and that's important because otherwise you'll end up resenting him for something he can't change and that's bad for both of you

youmakemewanna, I think you're right, I really enjoy sex and I'm a once a day kinda girl, I would definitely have started to resent him (I think I had tbh)

Yes deal breaker. Sorry. Crap sex is like a life sentence.

Hey, Curiosity, we all started out 'crap at sex' once, remember!

I don't think it makes any difference. If you're into someone, you're into them. Love will find a way :)

Nope - disagree sorry. I think there can be nervous fumbling to begin with... but I've discovered there are just some people you're more compatible with than others. Like humour - either get on or don't.

If it isn't 'doing it for you' and it starts to feel like a compromise then I've not personally been able to come back from that. Despite 'trying'.