The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Posters, Lurkers, Old Or New, Come Take A Seat, This Bus Is For YOU!

[Mouseface]

Hello, I'm Mouse

A huge big welcome to the Brave Babes threads.

We're a varied group of posters, on this wonderfully supportive, non judgemental, gigantic Bus, and we are all heading in the same direction - towards Sobriety.

Some of us don't touch a drop of alcohol, some of us do. Some of us drink too much, openly admit it and are desperate to stop and some of us are trying to manage controlled drinking.

No matter what we're doing, we're just trying to do it One Day At A Time.

What ever you need, what ever your habit, chances are that there'll be another poster who is just like you or has been where you are now, already here, waiting to talk or just listen :)

Yes, some of us have been here for a longer time than others, some of us for just a few days but that's what makes this Bus so great imo, the variety of knowledge and understanding :)

This Bus has been whizzing along various roads now for almost four years thanks to the very desperate cry for help from THIS THREAD BY JWN

And if you'd like to read some of the other threads, maybe how we got to where we are today, then you can follow them back using the links RIGHT HERE

Hope to see you soon :)

Good morning all babes. I'm in the sidecar with Isinde and Ma, some French cheese (nice and mild for the morning), several baguettes and a big jug of cafe au lait, if anyone would like to join me . Well done to all abstaining babes and waves at all babes trying to abstain. I'm a bit like Joey, I don't really drink when I'm out as such, as have had too many nights of making a complete tit of myself, so if I go out, I drive and don't drink. I'm an 'at home' drinker. Like Isinde for me, a bottle of wine is quite moderate. I can enjoy it during cooking dinner and finish it off with dinner. We don't eat until late, just me and the old man, who likes a few beers, but we don't drink afterwards, so it's all early stuff.

No, what absoloootely killed me was one of the rellies. He's a red wine drinker of ginormous proportions, not stopped by food (and by God I tried, if there's one thing this house isn't short of, it's food), not stopped by tiredness, in fact he wouldn't be stopped by being run over by our bus. Until three o'clock, three nights on the trot, at least three (oh yes ) if not four, bottles of red. Horrible to watch, loud and obnoxious. But (I hate to admit this) I felt quite pious and judgy with my three to four large glasses of white. What is it, that when I see someone drink so much more than me it makes me feel so much better about myself, do we all get this feeling? I mean fgs a bottle of wine is too much to drink in one night for practically everybody, but I can justify it so easily?

Anyway, that's my life really, cooking and hanging out with Mr Ladame and drinking wine. I don't know how it would affect us if I stopped completely (I do have three-ish nights off). The hanging out with him and drinking wine are so entwined and always at the end of the day.

Lastly, (can you tell I'm putting off going into the kitchen to work where is Purple and Mouse hope you're ok. Hi babyjane, Hi Awks, well done Full Well done Lonnika. Love to all other babes, old and new.

Hi all, it's funny we are bemused why we do it. I know I do it because I love the fuzzy feeling it gives me. I like feeling blurry - until 4 am when I am awake and churny.

There's a lot in that one day at a time platitude, that's all most of us can cope with I guess. Love and luck to everyone and hope we all keep the plug in the jug today

Hi babes, awks love the plug in the jug remark!!! Here's a good one, haven't drank more than twice in the last 3 weeks and although I realise how boring my life actually is without the evening fuzzy feeling (I too love that sensation) I'm quite pleased than the bottle a night habit is broken. I went to the alcohol clinic to get more helpful tips on managing stress and anxiety that leads to the bottle, during the meeting I was breathalysed for the first time in my life and had my urine checked for alcohol markers, all were clear, it was humiliating!!! So since I went to the doctors to ask for HELP in managing my anxiety and confessed my self soothing with wine I have had a phone call from social services with my teenage dd received and freaked out, a visit from social services to check I'm a capable parent and breathalysed in the team I went to for advice. I wonder why I bloody bothered, I'm a good mum, keep a nice home and try to look presentable at all times and I'm treated like SCUM, I'm very hurt and disappointed in the system x x x

Ps went home last night and drank a bottle of wine as I was so upset, ironic or what xxx

Baby - are those last two posts about you? Sorry, to ignore everyone else but I've just read those posts and I'm absolutely livid and shocked on your behalf.

I'm so, so sorry that you have been put through this. Are you okay? I mean, WTAF were these people thinking?

All of your hard work undone, all of your fight and spirit fucked.

Why on earth have you been treated like that? Is your DD okay?

Massive hugs to you xxx

babyjane Furious, absobloodylutely furious on your behalf. How dare they assume they can treat you like that??? Especially since you were brave and responsible enough to reach out for some help. It's enough to put anybody off fgs. I'm so sorry. Am so cross - have a ((hug)) from me. Wanders off muttering ... and shaking head ....

mouse yup that's what happened, I'm ok now, at the end of the meeting they informed me that they didnt think I was an alchy and that I had just gotten a bit overwhelmed with stress and had been using wine as a crutch (I could have told them that FFS, my dd thought they would take her away and they apologised for a junior member of staff stating the reason for the call to one of my children, I can only say thank god I had already changed my bottle a night habit or I
Would have been quaking in my boots, I'm a bright, confident woman so I know it was a ridiculous course of action but someone more vulnerable would have been scared shitless!!! Thanks for your concern mouse
Appreciate your passion on my treatment, makes me sorry i asked for help in the first place x x x

Baby - makes me sorry i asked for help in the first place - exactly!!

Look what they've done to someone who DOESN'T have an alcohol dependency problem! What would they have done if it turned out that you DID?

I actually am shaking on your behalf!

Your DD must have been scared to death poor girl. I wish I could give her and you a giant hug right now. How counter-productive is that kind of behaviour?

You go for help and get treated like that? Diabolical. Unacceptable. I hope that you are both okay although I'm sure it's going to take a while for the shock of being threatened with being put into care isn;t going to be forgotten any time soon. xxx

babyj they breathalysed you?! do they even have the right to do that without your consent?

It's unbelievable, really

How easy it is to slip back into old ways...

I'm okay, only drinking my 500ml wine, once a week, usually Saturday. I don't mind DH having a drink as long as its beer or whiskey, and he doesn't flaunt it.

Well... yesterday he moaned "I haven't got any beer". I shrugged "I haven't got any wine."

20 mintues later, he announced he was off out to buy beer - and of course that triggered my urge! If he's just said he needed shower gel or lunch for the next day, and then quietly came back with some beer without being obvious about it I'd have been fine!

Anyway - I asked him to get me a couple of things (meaning mini bottles of wine) but no gin; he misunderstood and thought I meant a couple of treats, but no alcohol! Result: he didn't get me any wine after all!

A year ago I would have sulked for a couple of hours (2 years ago, I'd have made him go back to get me some ) Last night I was only cross for about 10 minutes - so maybe things really are improving in my dependancy

Checking in. Unsurprisingly have had a hangover all day and found it really hard to get anything productive done. We live and learn.

baby - unbelievable. So sorry the appointment was completely unhelpful.

awks LOVE 'plug in the jug' - I'm going to start using that when people ask me if I want a drink. I'll reply, slightly enigmatically 'Thank-you, but I'm keeping the plug in the jug today'.

babyjane that's absolutely shocking - a social worker told your dd the reason they were calling. Unacceptable totally. Don't let those idiots spoil your good work though, will you - that would be a tragedy.

I like plug in the jug too as it sounds slightly smutty ooooh er matron

Thanks babes for rallying round, I keep thinking what if I had had wine the night before, what would have followed? alias they said everyone was breathlysed, PROCEDURE, as I say I'm not freaking out because I know now it's just a habit reaching for the bottle rather than physical need but my heart was pounding and I felt sick when he brought out the tube only ever seen 1 on tv, the whole thing was surreal, a few weeks ago on a bottle a night I think I would have shit myself literally. Even worse they know I have Crohn,s, this could have triggered an attack for me, anyway not my best day, I'm now being monitered by social services and they are contacting my DD's school to ensure she is a happy healthy child, it's like it's happening to someone else, think I'm in shock!!! Xxx

edinbugger are you feeling better now? Ds's school is just a state school by the way - just a fairly strict one!
Yes, yes to adopting Spirit into the sidecar. He is so cool. Will he get on OK with Barry? frets.
indie budge up love, and make room for Spirit. He's one of us now.
baby I'm sorry you were treated so badly. Hope you feel better now.
Has ANYONE had any contact with Venus ?
awks how are you?

babyj I really don't think that is good practice (t the breathalyzing) for a service which is supposed to be helping and supporting you. Makes me wonder how they come up with these policies. Glad you are feeling okay about it - as you say it could have had a very negative impact.

DISGUSTEC BABY!! ABSOLUTELY DISGUSTED - you go for help and get made to feel like an unfit mum - WRONG just WRONG - Feel cross for you!!!!!!!!!!

Baby I agree that sounds totally wrong and would put anyone of asking for help. A bottle a night habit is much more common I would say than anyone seems to realise. If that is criterion then they better start a major childrens home building programme!!! Good luck and well done on reducing so much. My motto of dont let the bastards grind you down might help you??
Day 28 and no inkling. Feel grand.

Baby I actually wonder if they've got your notes mixed up with someone else. I've never heard of SS acting like that without a much more involved history leading up to this point. Don't want to worry you but is there anyone you think may have contacted ss about you or your family in the past? Can you ask to see your file? I think if you put it in writing, you are entitled to see everything that's been written about you.

Morn

Morning babes thanks for all your support, I was thinking it may put any lurkers or posters off going for support but almost every one else on here has sung the praises of the alcohol svs available to them. Anyway the plug is firmly back in the jug and I'm focussing on eating well, using my wine money to buy myself kindle books and getting back to the gym and lose some weight. Onwards and upwards or downwards with regards to wine and weight .... Big waves to all newbies and oldies (figure of speech) how's everyone else doing x x x

Good for you baby :)

well done babyj

hello

is anybody there