The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Posters, Lurkers, Old Or New, Come Take A Seat, This Bus Is For YOU!

[Mouseface]

Hello, I'm Mouse

A huge big welcome to the Brave Babes threads.

We're a varied group of posters, on this wonderfully supportive, non judgemental, gigantic Bus, and we are all heading in the same direction - towards Sobriety.

Some of us don't touch a drop of alcohol, some of us do. Some of us drink too much, openly admit it and are desperate to stop and some of us are trying to manage controlled drinking.

No matter what we're doing, we're just trying to do it One Day At A Time.

What ever you need, what ever your habit, chances are that there'll be another poster who is just like you or has been where you are now, already here, waiting to talk or just listen :)

Yes, some of us have been here for a longer time than others, some of us for just a few days but that's what makes this Bus so great imo, the variety of knowledge and understanding :)

This Bus has been whizzing along various roads now for almost four years thanks to the very desperate cry for help from THIS THREAD BY JWN

And if you'd like to read some of the other threads, maybe how we got to where we are today, then you can follow them back using the links RIGHT HERE

Hope to see you soon :)

that's great news fullof

I keep thinking that not drinking tonight is a big deal, it's going to be hard etc. but that is actually faulty thinking. Every time I've managed it previously, haven't I come on the Bus afterwards and said things like -

"It was easier than I expected"
"DH joined me in not drinking"
"Really not so hard to do"

EVERY TIME! The idea of it is worse than the reality.

Great news Full
Alias I agree with your way of thinking - it is only 4 or so hours of your life - I bet you did 4 hours every morning AF without drink even crossing your mind :). Good luck tonight :)

Joey you are so right. And can I add a bit of my experience too. If you make the decision to not drink and are absolutely sure about it, the desire to drink goes away anyway. At least for me it does.

If I know 100% for certain that I'm not going to drink, I don't get any cravings.

For example, I took my dd and her friend out for lunch and was driving. I ordered a soft drink with my meal and even though all around me people were drinking wine in the restaurant, I didn't want any, not for one second did the thought occur to me. Because I knew I wouldn't drink and drive.

And many of us have said we didn't touch a drop during pregnancy and found it easy. Because we knew we wouldn't drink.

It's only that hesitation, deliberation, unsureness, call it what you will, that gives the WW an opening to get in your head and bug you about it. Kick her out, I say

Another thought, sorry if this is too personal, why do you go to your in-laws if you don't really get on with them? Do you feel a sense of obligation, or something. Because you don't have to go you know. Your dh could go on his own if he wants to see them. Just a thought, ignore me if I'm speaking out of turn.

clutter sounds like a good plan, if you're sure it won't lead you on to more drinking. Not everyone can drink like that but if it works for you, go for it

full phew, that's a relief. I am so glad that you got good news. Don't forget to keep us updated on how the drinking/not drinking is going x

Thanks everyone and day 15!! I am really loving having my head back 100% and im not even thinking vaguely about wine. Ive managed somehow to find a new way of being. Still have problems to solve but thats life! I dont know how (although have a few theories) but ive cracked it! Xxx to all

Yay well done for positive post full - I have had some major cravings today but a quick google of effects of alcohol and the damage it does has put me right of- going to have a bath and then a chocolate magnum instead.

Well lone lonnika :) might do the very same myself!!

Just checking in. Hope everyone is doing okay tonight.

Am not drinking, and its fine. PIL even had some herbal teas.

Well done alias, you did good girl, it's quiet here tonight,everyone ok? Xxx

Night babes, went to neighbours & stuck to the plan. Have had 2.5 bottles of Smirnoff ice, loads of ice & gallons of cherry juice. Will probably be up all night needing a wee!
Can see how easily I could of said "fuck it" female neighbour drinking wine, make neighbour drinking whiskey & for a fleeting moment thought "whiskey would give you a good hit!" Wtf?
Hope I feel ok in the morning.
Hope all babes getting through tonight ok
Night x

Well done clutter-you should feel grand in morning I would say.

Morning babes! Little boy woke at 4:50!!!! Thank jeff I didn't drink wine! Feel tired but ok.
Think I need to give socialising a miss until ds moves out, too tiring!
Getting ready for school fair & dh off for a change so we can be a family instead of it always being me & the boy!
Wishing everyone a good day & hope the sun shines for you xx

Hi everyond its lovely and sunny here hopefully staying that way all day ( with bit of luck) - day 16 and no obstacles ahead.

Hi everyone, do you mind if I join. Been on MN forever but have name changed for this cos the thought of outing myself to folk in RL is too horrible. I have a big problem with alcohol - can easily drink a bottle of wine a night and lately more. Usual boring reasons/excuses - stressful job, 'need' it to wind down. I've stopped and started over the years but I'm getting to the point where I have to do something.Quite aside from the damage that I must be doing to my insides I'm starting to look like a lush - my skin is dry, my face is bloated and I'm a good two/three stone over-weight. (Mmmmm - don't I sound like a catch!). Have lurked on this thread before when I've not been drinking and found it incredibly helpful but feel like this time I have to post or by this evening I'll be finding an excuse to open the bottle. In the short-term my goal is not to drink at home - in the long term I'm contemplating stopping all together. Strategy today is to keep busy and stay positive. I've been here before and fallen off the wagon - this time I need to make it stick.

Hi babes:) day six here. Aim for me is also to not booze at home. I never used to these habits just crep up on us don't they.. Am looking for this famous boing its not with me as yet. Xx

Bus feels v quiet. Where are you all?? Xx

Thanks isinde - my trigger time is shamefully early! I have to be super careful around 4/5pm - kids in from school, homework, thinking about starting making dinner. I find if I can get to 7pm the craving passes - the problem is I very rarely get to 7pm without cracking. Half thinking I might drag my sorry arse out for a jog at trigger time tonight but that might be a step too far... :)

Hi everyone.

I've just been catching up slowly after a few pop-in posts, and I know it's now a while back, but isinde, your post about your mother made me so angry for you, but also so glad you've been able to let go of all the bitterness she was pushing at you.

You always come across as a lovely woman and a lovely mum, anyone can see that.

I'm going to remember faire's post: 'One of the best things my parents did for me was show me how not to raise children.' I sometimes get a bit worried I'd be a bad mum because my parents - though I have an ok relationship with them now - were not great. But it's so much better to turn it around and try to see it as an example the other way, not a pattern I have to follow. I know I try to do this with DH, to make sure our relationship isn't like my parents'. So we do have screaming rows occasionally (who doesn't?), but then we sort it out, and we apologize for where we were being out of line, and we move on.

He is looking after me today as I've caught a bug off my darling, snuffly niece and am nicely light-headed and sleepy. Just right for staving off the booze cravings, in fact!

Welcome to edin and pink.

Today is day 13 for me - longest it's been in a while. Thanks so much for the hand-holding, babes.

Hope everyone is out enjoying the sun!

Well, was good last night but little boy woke so early so still felt like shit today. Have took him to fair and tried to be a good mum but felt so tired.
Been feeling low & not sure if that's chest infection, new job, drinking last night.
Dh blew up paddling pool and we filled it then it started to rain...of course it did this is Scotland!
I felt to take edge off tiredness if have last Smirnoff ice with mixer at 1pm.
Dh then took dd to her dancing & I thought I'd finish Smirnoff ice. Then had proseco & mixer. Was starting to get warm fuzzy feeling. Dh came home & we had a giggle watching ds run round. In all the weeks I've not been drinking I've not felt like laughing when sober. Have finished proseco & want more.
Feels like alcohol helps take away the relentless monotony & boredom of raising children when skint.
I know, I know, I know this is temporary but it feels nice to laugh.

welcome edinbugger. From your name I think you might live near me?
venus my thoughts are with you today, my friend.

I have just one more thing to say:

Derek
Mango massage oil
Hot stones

Somebody give that man a medal.

Well done to all abstaining babes! I am so not doing at all well. Only managed two nights off this week. My hormentals are driving me mad . I?m either careering around in a total strop or crying at TV adverts. I?m no use to anyone on the bus at the moment. Even the dog is avoiding me.

Yes Ma - I think I do!

Welcome edinbugger and well done for being brave and posting!

faire it is an obligation to visit the in-laws, they had DD during half-term. Also, I'm very antisocial anyway and if I never go anywhere I could end up a lonely mad old woman!

But it was okay, alcohol doesn't make the evening better or worse (it just makes me more likely to lose my temper and say something stupid!) and I will say it again and again until it is drummed into my brain - I'm GLAD I didn't drink last night.

Anyway, tonight I do have some wine (I allow myself once a week) and am at home, with a controlled amount.

Is venus okay? Her mother...?

Another fight with WW tonight but so far I am winning :).
Just going to do some work and then watch TV and go to sleep.

Oh clutter I know exactly what u mean re boredom an monotony - I have been AF for 4 weeks and 5 days but still find it hard - in fact at the moment finding it harder than at the beginning :(.
Have a good night everyone - L xxx