This is the dating thread 54, all welcome!

[JulietteMontague]

All very welcome to share online and real life dating experiences.

"Technical reasons"
"Clever girl".
Happy birthday velvet

I'm liking the love for beards on here. My slightly long stubble has probably crossed the line into short beard at the moment and I'm liking it so it'll probably stay.

Feeling a bit fed up at the moment. Since finishing with geeky girl I've not had much luck OD wise. All very quiet. I had a date with the Italian, which went well but she's on holiday at the moment and then it looks like we'll be struggling to coordinate to see each other for a couple of weeks.

I think the whole "divorce process actually starting" is just making me feel a bit rubbish. Coupled with an inability to meet someone I can actually manage to spend any time with, I'm just moping a bit at the moment.

"Moustache".

Yay, Cherry!

Happy birthday, Velvet! Hope you're having a great evening.

Evening everyone. And Happy Birthday Velvet.

Bill - how long are the whiskers before it's classed as a beard? 1cm? more? I'm trying to work out how to get it back to a respectable length, but having a goatee for 15 odd years means I never had to worry about that kind of thing.

I have a date on Wednesday with Banker, one at the end of the week with OutOfMyLeague and I'm seeing the Finn (who just wants to be friends but always wants to sit next to me when out with other people.. hmm...) as well next week.

This weekend I have my DC so I shall be practicing my dancing in front of the Xbox whilst all of us wear pirate eyepatches. Apparently.

This weekend, Bant, I will be supervising twenty pre-teen girls in a swimming pool, god help me, for my dd's party. Wanna swap?

I have had flowers and a card, and been taken out for 4 mojitos. I have eaten nothing all day barring a v v small flapjack so am quite pissed

Plus a whole afternoon of flirty messages. Not from C but from the 23yr old. But better than nothing!

Hopw you're all having rather lovely evenings too :)

Sounds like a great birthday to me Velvet, really glad you've had a goodun

Oooh quite excited about new man who has messaged me on Match! Definite possibilities here ...

Update on Meet Up guy - as you may know I am not OD, deciding to hang out with RL singles & see what emerges, soooooo....
Despite being a Rules girl I did text him today, but I think that was ok, as he texted back. It was a friendly text. We had both signed up for the same meal. The more I see him the more I like him. Ate food off each others plates & shared a pudding. After, I suggested that he walk me to my car & there was a kiss - actually two - and very nice they were!
However, I am now channelling my inner 15 year old - at least I remember how to do this stuff, but I was married for 24 years so skills pretty rusty. I am not sure where if anywhere this is going, I have only been split from evil git STBXH for 4.5 months - is this too soon? Remind myself it is all practice & doesn't have to mean anything.
Only weird thing is he must have googled me by something he said, but I have googled him, but didn't let on. Continue with slowly, slowly, but I do feel a bit emotionally lost - what am I doing, where am I going?

Ive read this thread but its probably my first post. Moanranger, I feel everything you've just written. Early days are so so nebulous aren't they. I won't go into my story but have been pretty sad etc. blah blah. Ive just met someone im swooning about and having to take deep breaths and not do the "da da da da" thing and get married to him in my head... Ok, ok, I have! (grin). When you think about it though, how lovely for us ay and practice makes perfect doesn't it. I thought I was dead downstairs, now im tingling again. It's shown me that Im still a sexy minx really..... Just go with the flow and enjoy!

Clipped love the"married in your head" thing - I know exactly what you mean! Since NO WAY am I marrying again mine is more fabulous sexual congress of amazing variety - my re-emerging libido is creating problems. Agree it is nice to feel attractive and to know that I can "do sexy."

Ranger - I've never read the Rules (is there an official pamphlet somewhere) - but if anyone was to treat them as scripture, they're the kind of person I wouldn't be interested in anyway.

Eating off each other's plate, someone you're comfortable with and fancy. That's good. Take it as slow as you want - the point is someone who's good to be with will let you go at your own pace, as long as you talk about stuff.

nice one, by the way :)

Ahh but if its fabulous sex stuff why are you bothered whether he's eating off your plate or googling? confused here.

Oh, it's hotting up. Meet Up guy just sent a text " wishing we lingered longer." My inner 15 year old now in full flow. At least I left him wanting more, which is good in Rules land.

I will now be unable to sleep!

Bant The Rules is a book now rather passé but is basically about letting men do all the running. I don't really follow it, but I do like to keep a bit back, a bit of mystery & also not to pursue as I have a full and interesting life. On the flip side, when I am with someone, male or female I like to give them my full attention as a sign of respect & caring.

I read this when it first came out and some of it does make sense (unfortunately) unless you really don't give a shit. It can be carried too far though and you'd probably want to kick yourself with all the lost opportunities (arent the authors divorced now). We just have to be careful not to do the "overload" stuff. Turn it round, walk in anothers shoes, if you like. Do you want to get 10 texts a day? Do you want to get a text sometimes when you've just bloody woken up? Consideration is the key...

I have a full and interesting live. Because I am not getting laid enough. I see this as a completely seperate question to whether and how much I should contact someone.

I am retracting my optimistic words on OD earlier. I have had a flurry of dates of late and all really disappointing. I think I'll meet up with one again in the hope that some of his quirkier traits were down to first date nerves. But this has been a real week where I've felt like I might be in a sitcom. I am starting to doubt if I will ever meet the kind of man I like OD, but I'm not meeting them in real life either because they're all getting into what may be doomed first marriages.

'kind of ironic hipster showoff gay...'

'Technical reasons...'

'Clever girl...'

This thread has been comedy gold today.

I'm one for a bit of be-stubblement.. Like a bit of a beard, me.

Back from namelesses for the night, DS1 has been very miserable today, including phoning me at work and my boss overhearing and asking if I needed to go and frankly quite pathetic attempts at self harm, so I've come home...but not before the type of sex that people write songs about. It was ridiculously romantic, I shall remain tight lipped at risk of alienation and to attempt to retain a vestige of ladylike demeanour (but, wow!)

He's meeting the DCs soon. He said he wasn't nervous, because they're just people. I laughed at him and told him they would try to suck his brains out through his ears.

Do you want to get 10 texts a day? Do you want to get a text sometimes when you've just bloody woken up? Consideration is the key...

But who does that? Is there anyone who thinks that's appropriate? I think this is why I hate the Rules, it gives the impression that left to their own devices women would be operating completely full of boundaries. And we wouldn't, because we're normal functioning people.

oh get over yourself stranger....

Eh, what would 'getting over myself' look like or achieve? I think I'm fine thanks.

JOSH HOMME!

I might mention in passing, I was chatted-up by nick Oliveri once. I regretfully declined.

but only because my then bf was there