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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

newish partner called me a disgusting bitch....its got to be the end hasn't it?

120 replies

KidderminsterKate · 04/05/2013 19:53

...

OP posts:
TravelinColour · 04/05/2013 20:20

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

scottishmummy · 04/05/2013 20:20

he moody,over reacts,verbally abusive.hardly a keeper
if he's like this now few years down line will be worse,take it as a warning
you've had a predictive warning of hw nasty he is,call it quits now

pictish · 04/05/2013 20:21

Are you really having to think about this?!
Of course you should ditch him.

ColinCaterpillar · 04/05/2013 20:21

My EA ex was like that too AKiss - yet used to have me accompany him to the toilet when he went. Nice.

LapsedPacifist · 04/05/2013 20:21

What a pig! Shock That sort of indimidating behaviour in bed is a huge red flag. No-one is going to escalate an argument when they're undressed and vulnerable! Tosser!

I really want him to realise it was not on to speak to me like that.

Just tell him NO-ONE speaks to you that way EVER and he's dumped. Tell him to get help for his temper. He'll 'realise' quick enough. Hmm

LEMisdisappointed · 04/05/2013 20:22

Its a new relationship and he is already shouting at you over trivial stuff - Run, run fast

MoominsYonisAreScary · 04/05/2013 20:23

I'd get rid, how would it work long term? What if when you finally introduced him to your dc, would he sulk and call them names if they upset him.

Bin him off

RiotsNotDiets · 04/05/2013 20:23

Agree with other posters WRT this being a red flag, get rid.

Let a RL friend know about it too, just to be on the safe side.

flippinada · 04/05/2013 20:23

Well, I agree with everybody else who says get rid and don't look back.

I think you have to take a deep breath and say no thanks, not working out.

I wouldn't bother trying to make him see the error of ways, either.

SugarPasteGreyhound · 04/05/2013 20:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

flowery · 04/05/2013 20:24

He'll realise it's not on when he gets dumped for it, surely?

Machli · 04/05/2013 20:24

Dump immediately. Unless you want to spend your life being called those kinds of names at various intervals in your life together.

Vivacia · 04/05/2013 20:25

His behaviour is totally out of order, why on earth does he think it's ok to talk to you like that? Let him know, in a calm way, that it wasn't ok for him to talk to you like that and that you won't be seeing each other again.

AKissIsNotAContract · 04/05/2013 20:26

He'll realise it's not on when he gets dumped for it, surely?

If only it were that easy to stop abusive men. He'll just move onto someone with lower self esteem who'll put up with his shit :(

pictish · 04/05/2013 20:26

He swore at you, insulted you and called you a nasty name...all in one fell swoop, for farting.

You do NOT want this man for a partner.

expatinscotland · 04/05/2013 20:29

Have you got rid yet? What SugarPaste said.

Loulybelle · 04/05/2013 20:29

WTF, dump the fucker, its your house, you can fart til theres a thick fog if you wanted too.

Original poster
KidderminsterKate · 04/05/2013 20:29

OK...have just text him exactly what sugarpaste said and turned my phone off.

will not tolerate it and its made me feel edgy all day and been snappy with my children

will miss the company though - the good bits

OP posts:
fastdriver · 04/05/2013 20:31

Well done. No drinking wine and regretting it, OK?

tethersend · 04/05/2013 20:31

More red flags than Trotsky doing Semaphore.

Original poster
KidderminsterKate · 04/05/2013 20:32

no....I rarely change my mind and he knows this.

OP posts:
UniqueAndAmazing · 04/05/2013 20:32

normal: when we first started dating, dh used to go to the stairs to fart. I only found this out when I farted in front of him. he laughed in a very shocked way, explained about the stairs and then did a massive fart in front of me. he was being polite because it was such a new relationship.

not normal: getting angry and calling you a disgusting bitch because you farted.

people who are in new relationships are n their best behaviour. he's telling you his true personality. the best thing you can do is believe him and dump him.

whosiwhatsit · 04/05/2013 20:33

Well done, and don't let him come back. You'd have ended up abused with him and you don't want o expose your dcs to that.

Slobberedupon · 04/05/2013 20:33

Just asked my DH what he thought of the situation, his response " just get rid of him"... I agree, what would ever happen if you were really ill, what would he do? I once had an awful case of of D & V and ended up in the bathroom with it coming out both ends - DH, who physically doesn't deal well with that sort of thing, was amazing helping me. That's what you need in a DP, someone who realises you're human.

Saying all that, DH just farted on the couch next to me so he can't really say much at the moment.

I think that you're taking the right approach in seriously considering if this is someone that you want to be with. Personally, I'd be showing him the door...

Original poster
KidderminsterKate · 04/05/2013 20:33

thanks everyone for clarifying just what i've been thinking all day

OP posts: