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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Hate filled , and really fricking lonely .

51 replies

Littleblue · 25/04/2013 23:57

Pathetic isn't it ... worked so hard to keep men at a safe distance , I failed to notice how lonely I am .... as soon as men flirt with me I want to kill them , heard it all before .... the internet is riddled with fappers and im so bloody tired ....

OP posts:
Sunnywithshowers · 26/04/2013 01:05

No advice, but Flowers and un-mumsnetty hugs xxx

garlicyoni · 26/04/2013 01:13

I'm going to bed now, but I hope you'll feel able to tell a bit more and get some feedback. Will check tomorrow. Flowers from me too.

CogitoErgoSometimes · 26/04/2013 17:28

Being filled with hate is a lonely business. Move well away from the internet and keep yourself busy with work, play, friends, hobbies, exploration, whatever grabs you. You'll still meet flirts IRL but they're rarely as single-mindedly skanky as the one's on' t' Tinterweb....

Original poster
Littleblue · 26/04/2013 17:40

Self pity is never attractive , but I'm sick of having to be strong for everybody else , and wondering why I always get it wrong tbh , nice men drive me mental , sleazy men incense me .... the only Mr Right in my world lives 6 hours away.... thanks girls xx

OP posts:
Original poster
Littleblue · 26/04/2013 17:41

" single mindedly skanky " is accurate ... lol , so bored of it , even the intelligent ones lapse into grooming eventually ...

OP posts:
ClippedPhoenix · 26/04/2013 18:32

Im back on line dating and haven't had any of this??????? I don't talk to anyone dodgy at all really. If it starts I just press the delete button.

Original poster
Littleblue · 26/04/2013 18:46

I don't deliberately talk to anyone dodgy , lol ... maybe I need to reassess my standards Grin

OP posts:
ClippedPhoenix · 26/04/2013 18:55

Nothing wrong with my "standards" littleblue, they're very high indeed, maybe you need to reassess your pictures and profile.

Original poster
Littleblue · 26/04/2013 19:02

That was a bit harsh ! , I wasn't referring to your standards , I was referring to mine ! Shock

OP posts:
Original poster
Littleblue · 26/04/2013 19:03

As for my pictures and profile , I am careful not to invite seedy attention , my pictures and profile are decent , mature and carefully pitched so as not to invite pondlife .

OP posts:
ClippedPhoenix · 26/04/2013 19:08

Apologies for harshness littleblue. I obviously read it wrong Flowers
There are twats absolutely everywhere not just on line. It helps to have profile piccys with absolutely no cleavage showing whatsoever and if the inuendos start just tell them to "keep it clean" and it's mostly adhered to. If not delete. Men are not so different to us and they get a lot of smut too. (im a woman by the way and im going on what ive been told).

Original poster
Littleblue · 26/04/2013 19:15

Apology accepted Smile I'd never show cleavage , that's what riles me , there is nothing whatsoever comehither about anything I write , or pics I share , I do have a rather strong sense of humour , perhaps its that ... but I'm not smutty about it , pillow talk belongs on the pillow , I don't understand why I attract the fappers ... I have said a few times I'm not interested in that kinda convo with a stranger , and once sent a chap a link to an adult singles site ... lol

OP posts:
ClippedPhoenix · 26/04/2013 19:16

If you're over 40 I've found a site where its extremely busy traffic wise (grin) and all the men I've come across, which is plenty (not meaning that in a big charlie potato me way) have been decent guys. Not sure if im allowed to say it on line. Will pm you if you wish. Let me know.

Original poster
Littleblue · 26/04/2013 19:17

I am , yes , near 45 in fact ... yes please do , curious Smile

OP posts:
ClippedPhoenix · 26/04/2013 19:17

I also have a rather wicked sense of humour but have learned not to do the double innuendo thing now.

qualitytoffee · 26/04/2013 19:31

clipped, can you send me a pm as well please? xxxx

ClippedPhoenix · 26/04/2013 19:38

Just sent you one quality.

qualitytoffee · 26/04/2013 19:42

Thank you x

Loulybelle · 26/04/2013 19:46

Little, im also in the lonely boat, 4 years single, 30th approaching, and i feel so shit about it, but i dont have the confidence to date, because i have such a shit opinion of myself, and people reinforce how i feel. I've been stuck for 4 years.

ClippedPhoenix · 26/04/2013 19:46

Youre welcome and good luck. It's ok for others to say stop doing it, enjoy being on your own blah blah, but most of us want (whether secretly or not) a partner and there is nothing wrong with that whatsoever.

Olderkidsaremine · 26/04/2013 19:47

Joining the queue to be pmed please!!!

I'm having the same problems Little blue but met a guy and had a couple dates, thought things were going well, became his friend on Facebook etc we had talked about recent exes and reasons for splits, he then went quiet.

It now transpires that the most recent ex has decided that she wants him back - she was out of his life until I became his friend on Facebook and it seems to be that she doesn't necessarily want him but no one else can have him either. Poor man he doesn't seem the type to fall for it but obviously has, as he has gone back to her and boy is she marking her territory loads of comments all over Facebook for me to see!

And apparently she is a 'lovely and special person' his words - just reinforces the self pitying aspect that I'm obviously not 'lovely and special'!!

Hissy · 26/04/2013 19:47

Oy, clipped.... if your PMing.....

I may be back on the market again soon...

ClippedPhoenix · 26/04/2013 19:54

PM'd you all, i hope/think....

ClippedPhoenix · 26/04/2013 20:05

Oh and don't be put off by the powder puff colours! Grin it's also very easy to navigate and the search thingy really works!!! you can actually stipulate things and you don't get messaged, especially the radius regarding millage, I live in London so why the hell do I want to speak to someone in Scotland, it aint gonna happen!

ClippedPhoenix · 26/04/2013 20:15

Olderkids, if it's any consolation mine doesn't want me back! Grin Just think yourself lucky that it was a 2 date scenario, I was a friggin 3 year rebound (ouch).