Dating thread no 51

[JulietteMontague]

All tales of online and real life dating here!

Glad he didn't disappoint SP!

OWW I don't know what I'll do if we do hit it off. I know the pitfalls of ldr and don't want that. I would not consider going to live in Dutchland, nice people can't make up for a place that's cold and flat. He is planning to go live on his boat, and wants to share that with forever woman. It would have been my dream a few years ago, but now I like my satellite tv comforts.

Seeing Buffy tonight now I'm back in (different) foreign parts.

So Indie isn't an engineer OWW?

Juliette - good news on Dutch

SP - sounds good with GoodLooking too..

Hi Rafaella, welcome to the thread. POF is a trial by fire but has worked for some people. Of free sites I prefer OKCupid.com in terms of finding people with more in common (as you get to answer lots of questions and see how other people answered them)

But be prepared. People vanish, turn out to be married, or ugly, or short, or boring, or very nice but no spark - but then some turn out to be fantastic.

Oh and the loo update when you're on a date is now pretty much mandatory :)

Is this a canal barge type boat Juliette and so confined to the waterways of Holland, or something that could find its way to a marina near you?

Bant silly question - he's an engineer too but a better class of engineer.

Hope you have a good time tonight with Buffy.

OWW - have you set a day to meet up with MrIndie? I hope he turns out to be as nice as he seems so far.

I thought I'd message someone on OKC who is apparently a 95% match. Started off well, and we were trying to organise a date this weekend, but ended less well when wanted me to share my "naughty thoughts" with him and suggested a spanking if I kept him waiting for the reply!

Might have a date with MrShort - supposed to be same height as me, so I hope he's not being optimistic with it.

So, what do engineers actually do?

I mean, I know roughly but they can't all be the same.

OWW :o @ a better class of engineer. All the engineers I've known though have been quite posh... hence the question about what they actually do and the differences etc.

oh oh oh and thank you everyone.

I'm doing spectacularly well on both non smoking and healthy eating fronts today.

I have got some friends to sponsor me and now I am a woman on a total mission... making it public means there's no way out now. I like it. I like having no choice. It's about time I had this kind of amazing motivation!

3lb gone since last week, 47lb left to shed! Should be there by oct/nov I hope.

oh and I just remembered something. Last time i managed to pull off the miracle of stopping smoking AND losing weight, it was not long before the big bad break up. I had been doing it because he was a truly spectacular man, gorgeous, fit, astonishingly educated... I wanted to be the me he deserved.

Now I want to be the me I deserve.

I deserve my health and fitness and to be at the peak of where I can be for my age. And I'm damn well going to have it. I deserve to be as gorgeous as I possibly can and while I'll still be very curvy 47lb down, I will no longer be fat or have fatness impinging on my gorgeousness! :o

I deserve to be able to take up my hobby of hillwalking and mountain climbing again and I'm bloody well going to do that too.

I think although I did ok, I got pretty lost in the fug and aftermath of the big bad break up. Then BC buggering off didn't help either. Well fuck the lot of em because I'm number one on my agenda (again)

AND I'm doing up my house and garden (well, will be soon as the funds are in)

And... only joking. that's it now :o

Splish I am going to message Indie tonight and tell him I would like to meet up and then hopefully we will get something arranged soon. (Sunday I hope but might not be a good day as I could be a little hung over).

Lubey you're not mixing with the same engineers as I am then! Consulting engineers tend to be a bit posher I suppose but they are often quite down-to-earth chaps. I spend a lot of my working life in the company of engineers - my in-depth knowledge of the breed is not just gained from farting about on PoF, honest. Indie is an engineering manager for a big site, Cakey is a manufacturing engineer, Knobber is a lift engineer, Italian is an aerospace engineer. There are also structural engineers, civil, mechanical, electrical, all sorts. It can be anything from on the tools to designing new roads and services for buildings so a real catch-all term and probably why there are so many of them about and all heading in my direction!

You sound like you are in a fantastic place at the moment. It's wonderful to see you so positive and confident.

oh buggeration.

There is a certain general approach on dating sites, I've found. Men are usually the ones who send spam mails (hey hun, howz u, all that stuff). More successful is the approach where I see a woman who looks and sounds interesting, attractive, not too specific in terms of requirements (e.g. must have brown hair, blue eyes, love cats, no children etc) and I send an email mentioning something in her profile. Hopefully something witty, charming or at least interesting enough for her to take a look at me and see if she's interested in chatting a bit.

It is rare though, that an interesting and attractive woman will contact me first - either by winking or messaging. It's happened a couple of times, but usually 9/10 of the women who wink or message me first are just not my cup of tea. I've gone on dates with a couple of the less attractive ones in the hope they're just unphotogenic, but that hasn't proved to be the case so far.

Now, though, I've worked out how to use a combination of the Match.com app for my phone and the website so I can see who is winking at me. One will tell me who winked but won't let me see their details, the other won't tell me who it was but will let me look at anyone. So I can now see that an attractive. Sorry. A Very attractive interpreter, 2 years younger than me, who sounds witty from her profile, has just winked at me.

So.. Problems.
Do I subscribe just to see if she's actually interesting? 25 quid a month is a bit much when OKC vaguely works for free.
One of her photos is of her wearing a bikini. She has a 6 pack. I have 2 6 packs at the moment due to the prevalence of fried food in hungaria and lots of dinner in hotels.
She is, I would say, a 9.5 out of 10. As I've said previously, I'm probably a 7 and a half. I can be amusing, interesting and am obviously amazing in bed, but it's weird to go into a possible date thinking she's out of my league before I get there. Then again, maybe that's what causes the butterflies, for me, being shallow like that.

And there is Buffy. There is no future in Buffy and we haven't talked much about exclusivity or anything because of that.
I wouldn't want to go behind her back (no jokes please) but I'm not comfortable seeing someone else on the quiet either.
Hmm. long post. Sorry.

Changing GoodLookings name to Sparky as its shorter and he's an electrician.

Anyways the toddler is going to his dads so I will be meeting Sparky tonight! Just deciding what to do.

I've been baking since yesterday and have 35 buns and a cake to get through!

Bant can you wink back without subscribing to see if this galvanises her into messaging? (Although if it were me I'd be expecting a message back rather than a winking rally). Are there any special offers around at the moment for Match subscriptions or three-day trials or anything? In context I suppose £25 is a good night out, so it just depends on whether you think it's worth it or not.

About the attractiveness - well, she wouldn't have winked unless there was something about you that she liked.

I think the stuff about Buffy is a red herring. You're a long way from seeing anyone behind her back. All you're doing here is talking about whether or not to sign up to a site to message someone you might possibly end up having a date with . . .

Bant have you got an iPhone? If so you can pay 4.99 for a weeks app use

good point Pom - that's far better than the 25 quid which auto-renews each month if I forget to cancel.

OWW - good points on both the attractiveness and herrings.

OWW right I see... flippin eck. I had no idea it was that catch all.

The two posh engineers I've known, I don't know exactly what they did but they were both extraordinarily good at maths, well spoken and wore suits a lot. and seemed to have a LOT of money.

One of them helped me with some of the maths in my open uni first compulsory module. All ten to the power of minus 52 and all that kind of level (all of which I've now forgotten again)

and yes it is a fantastic 'place' to be at. I had a mini sort of phase like this early last year but it was only weightloss and generally looking after myself.. nothing on the scale of this sudden task

I am loving it though! I truly am free of the ridiculousness of nicotine now too. Barely even think about it now all the withdrawal is gone.

Oh... forgot... dating wise I might not be completely on the sofa... rather I've just completely given up with OD (no time, cba, etc)

But like last time I did the looking after myself self improvement thing I'm still open to RL happenings. I have a big night out with meetup.com happening this coming weekend so who knows what might happen from that. I have vowed to go to at least one meetup event every two months and stop being a hermit!

Bant I would go for it. Buffy has mentioned to you that she will be seeing (or seeing to) other people on her various travels. If you really feel bad then have a proper conversation with her about it?

Good afternoon :)

I think my DS would make a good engineer (not quite sure why but think some type of it might suit him. He is only 9 though so don't need to worry just yet).

Have been tidying out the garage which has been an ongoing thing I gave been avoiding for nearly 3 years (ie when we moved in) and more so for the past 2 years (when XH left). There are many books belonging to him some of which haven't gone mouldy. Plus his nice digital SLR camera which I will give back to him. I need to keep making myself do stuff I think - one day I will have the house the way I want it and then the landlord will want it back. Just paid 6 months rent so ok for a while :)

Is lovely and sunny but v windy. Kept nearly getting blown away at the tip .

Talked to Mr Nice about sometimes staying here when the DC are here as well and he made favourable noises :) We talked about lots of other stuff too which was good. Am also thinking about applying for a real job ie something where you go there every day which feels a little outside my comfort zone but you don't know until you try do you?

Bant, make sure it looks like a real profile before you pay up. Didn't someone say that match sent winks from fakes to make you sign up again.

Hiya'll
Sorry if a I seem like a bad weather friend to the thread, but I'm a very faithful camp follower! Just wanted to share my rubbish past week on OD.

I finally called a halt to OD1 which those of you with really good memories will recall was Car Man. Light bulb went off when I realised we we were echoing my defunct marriage, him promising better times, more fun when he got his own place or the weather was warmer! Four months on and still meeting once a week for luke warm Coffee (I know the euphemism has moved on )

In the meantime OD2 appeared. Spent ages chatting, but couldn't sort a meet for about three weeks, but messages and later texts pretty much every day. Met finally and had a great evening. Lots of chat, subtle touching, and a great snog. Met a week later, even better time. More invigorating conversation than in all four months with Car Man. Even better snog and a touch more Left feeling it could be great.

Then Silence. Nothing at all since Thursday

Bruised but undaunted went back to OKC - where I happened to notice OD2 was online, but no matter - started chatting to mystery man who had messaged me but with no pic. Long string of interesting, witty banter, until I ask about lack of pic. Fucker's married, but 'only at weekends'!

Oh, and I also got a POF message this morning from someone I chatted with briefly when I first joined up, saying 'I still want to fuck you'. Which is nice!

So there we have Secret's sensational online successes. Pah!!

ha! I just found a way around Matches security algorithm. I can see everyone who viewed and winked at me rather than fuzzy images :)

ho hum.

That good bant ???

Bant what Pom said. Is she really that much out of your league? if so, eyes open as you are (even more of) a catch in Hungaria. Or, she could just not be worried about any of that and genuinely wants to practice her English skills

With regard to Buffy, its just a matter of timing now.

Secret that's pants, the whole OD thing does seem to be all or nothing sometimes. Are you ok?

OWW it's a yacht, with actual sails. I do like being at sea, but I think months at a time would get a bit much.

Lubey what you wrote about being the you, you deserve, spot on That's exactly why I'm doing my fitness thing with my Personal Trainer. I just signed up again for another 12 weeks today, plenty of other things need doing but my fitness is worth every penny and by July I will look and feel amazing.

I'm ok, thanks juliette just a bit bleh! Not helped by Lubey's posts as my nicotine rate has shot up along with my alcohol intake. Wish I could hers and your attitude inside me! Not forgetting all the bounce-backers on here

I suspect OD has become a distraction from a shit RL and maybe I should tackle all that first, but it all seems insurmountable at the moment

But as my dad always used to say worse things happen at sea!

Secret I'm about to sail off into a fantasy sunset with a man I've never met, do hope not