Dating thread number 48 :-)

[MirandaWest]

Here's the latest thread for everything dating related. All welcome :)

A hand luggage person got off. I should have made a dippy sign I think

Can I have some advice on composing a message to someone I've been talking to on POF and by phone and text for a few weeks please? We were supposed to meet last week but he cancelled and now he's pushing for another date. He's very pushy and keeps going on about getting the 1st date out of the way so we can go to his house on the 2nd date for sex! He keeps asking where I live, what my last name is, what my business is called etc. He's freaking me out a bit and when I say no he keeps pushing. I need to ditch him quickly. he just rang then but I didn't answer. I need to send a message that is direct and i'm not very good at that. I've been talking to someone else who is the polar opposite to this guy and I would much rather meet him.

Rain, tell him straight that you are not interested and that you don't want him to contact you again. Block him on PoF. If he keeps calling or texting after you've told him it's unwelcome, then tell him you will call the police on him as it is harrassment. No need to put up with this type of horrible behaviour.

ohmy

I would send

"your recent pushy behaviour means I am no longer comfortable meeting you, please do not contact me again"

wait five minutes so he sees the message (don't refresh though so you don't see his inevitably abusive or blackmailing reply) and then block.

Ignore the phone if he calls...

my worst stalker gave up ringing and texting after two days ignoring so just wait it out and he'll go away.

Thanks, I just text him and I was nice about it, said I'm not ready for dating, too much going on etc. If he gets nasty i'll tell him he's too pushy and not to contact me again.

As I was typing he replied "ok".

Well that was easy.

Phew!

Honestly the cheek of these men, who the f--k do they think they are that they can ask for sex on a second date with someone that might not fancy them on the first one.

I feel so relieved. He was constantly texting and ringing me, it'll be nice to have a bit of peace and quiet. The other one I've been talking to is really nice and sweet and hasn't mentioned sex at all.

I know exactly.

Miranda All smiley for you No idea what part of Yorkshire. Will keep my fingers crossed no snow.

OWW Know nothing about Match. Hope you figure out how to block.
Mr FU disappeared of POF after his encounter with me

Ohmy Good luck with the ditching. Hope guy No2 works out better.

OWW - if I were you, apart from you not wanting to see him anymore, I wouldn't worry about blocking him or whether he sees you've looked. Really. I mean, he's proved himself to be a fool, possibly planning to cheat if he'd set up those profiles before, and obviously not willing to step up to the plate and do what he'd said he would when you made your position clear. Plus the whole situation with the Little friend sounded very off to me.

If he sees you're on there, so what? Feck him.

Just block if you don't want him to come up in searches or 'daily 6' again. Don't worry about whether he knows you've seen him or not. His opinion doesn't matter anymore.

rainy - that sounds horrible. What a knob. Glad he's seen the light now.

Miranda - try not to knock him over when you jump on him. Armed police with big guns. Nuff said.

I was somewhat controlled Am back at their house now and need some sex a very big kiss before going back home

Is good to have him back in the same place as me I have to say :)

Well I've starting chatting to a couple of guys on Pof today. One seems like he is very high on energy, he's in sales and seems abit extreme! The other seems quite nice and calmer, but he only sent me a couple of messages! I'm going to need to get some action going on soon!

Western - sorry to hear about LM being online they are so crap! How are you finding match other then that? I've never been on there.

today's stupid conversation:

him:Hows your stranger x x x

me:hows my stranger?
what stranger?

him:well not seen you on line for a while as i have been to the states with work x x x
so you hooked up with any guys yett x x x

me:no I haven't, have you hooked up with any girls yet?
him:a couple of women a gone to swinger club fancy joining me x x

his profile pic has him wearing shades and looking at least 10 years older than he says he is, obvs bullshitting about the swinging and very much doubt he's managed to pull at all.

what has it come to that I'm at such a loose end as to consider this entertaining

Glad you had fun, and have moved on from brother's friend but OMGWinefiend! Be careful.

miranda yay!

I stopped smoking in November last year with champix. Occasionally have one if I'm drinking, but they now taste vile. :) of course, have put on about a stone, but that'll come off once weather improves and I start running again . Am not running in this weather oh no!

Evening all,

Doing well oww I like your new attitude. Keep it up!!!

I am back on pof. Have been asked on 2 dates and I really cba with either. That's not a good sign is it!? The one is very keen. 4 messages today and I have only just replied. He seems lovely and tells me that we have lots in common but then he mentioned his fave item of clothing was some fleecy top/jumper thingI could never ever ever accept a man wearing. I like my clothes and prob sound a bit shallow now but what he mentioned is a complete no go area for me. I am cringing at the thought of it. I should just end it here shouldn't I??? I'm just sooooooo tired that all I want to do is sleep and not worry about men. I have found od interesting but it is exhausting always having to have your guard up. I just don't trust anyone and feel very cynical about it all.

Anyone else had a similar experience?

Pome, remember fleecegate . Seriously, it wouldn't bother me too much what a guy wore. I like to look nice on a date but don't notice that much what they wear. I'm more concerned if there is chemistry and I can imagine kissing him.

I am cynical about it all though, you don't have to do it if you don't want to.

I wouldn't worry about his top either - it comes off. Actually I quite like jumpers/woollies especially in this sort of weather. If he's good in other ways, I'd meet him. But I am not at all fashionable or clothes conscious myself so I might not be the right person to advise!

Am in tears :( Have been out of the house for nearly 12 hours, come home and my house is even more of a fucking hovel than when I left (if possible). I told the DSs last night I was sick of the state of their rooms - which are full of dirty plates, glasses, empty food wrappers, drinks bottles, dirty washing everywhere, mixed with clean washing (which they never put away), Cds and Xbox games all over the floor - and told them to tidy up and hoover them before I came in. I have been asking for weeks, they do one or two things but never properly, so I really laid down the law last night about it - and this morning. I spoke to DS1 at 4 and he promised me they were doing it. and they've done fuck all, just like always. They've sat on their arses for 4 hours. I am so sick of living like this, sick of how they treat me, and how little respect they have for anything. I just can't bear it any more. I have nothing nice in my house, it's all been broken or damaged by them (or by the Ex when he was here). I work so bloody hard, I wish I had a nice home to come back to instead of this, but I don't feel like I'm ever going to.

Sorry, I probably should have started another thread Am sure you could all do without hearing my woes.

Thanks Bant - I don't want him to know I've looked at his profile in case he thinks I'm still interested in him and desperately stalking him around the Internet. I don't care if he knows I'm on there, in fact I hope he sees and realises that I'm moving on, but I just don't want him to get any satisfaction from thinking I'm still after him.

Velvet that's horrible. I have a similar war of attrition going on here over the same things. Had a huge row last week and he tidies up for one evening then straight back. Then more on Sunday and yesterday all day. It's soul destroying, you work you try to keep it nice and there seems to be no respect for you or anything you value. I have nothing to offer on this one, except you are right, they are wrong, and it doesn't matter if they get it they just have to do it