Dating thread number 48 :-)

[MirandaWest]

Here's the latest thread for everything dating related. All welcome :)

FYI: my dancing into the distance is reminiscent of the child catcher in Chitty Chitty Bang Bang

Good morning all, 48 that's great news [bugrin][bugrin][bugrin]

Velvet enjoy your Christening, are you actually in Essex? I always think of you are the head turner wherever you go.

Pom either don't answer for a good long while, just because he texts it doesn't mean you have to answer right away. You'll know by his reaction whether he is worth continuing with.

WFF already?

OWW Late monday night. I am at hospital Tuesday. So seeing him Wednesday.

We are busy planning the love making filth

Ears! Bunny ears! [bugrin]

Yes, well...I hardly wish to give nameless the impression that I am a slattern.

I am a slattern. [bublush]

Oh and a special [bubiscuit] jammy dodger for last nights DW.

I don't want to hurt new boys feelings but he is massively full on. He is really putting me off. There is nothing cool about his approach at all. There are red flags popping up everywhere. How can you distinguish between a stalker and someone that is over keen?

If someone is over keen and does respond to what you are saying more likely a nut job Pom

Follow your instinct

If he takes no notice of what you want Pom then it's fairly indicative that he has ishoos or is a knobber - I'm sounding the Tosspot Klaxon for you.

I am eating chocolate in bed.

I will have some bunny ears [busmile]

( Mr Showbiz just told me I'm 'bewitching' - cue me humming the Bewitched theme tune for the rest of the day ' dum dum der der de der der' )

Pom over keen is enough. His behaviour is disturbing you, that's it.

Pom have pm' you

Getting more annoyed now, he wants to change his relationship status on fb if out first date goes well!

I loved last night's DW Snape, how lovely to see the Dr falling in love.

Pom if you've told him you're not comfortable and he's carrying on, it's all about him and what he wants and nothing to do with having respect or consideration of what you want. I'd call it a day if it were me.

Rainy same advice for you. This isn't right, far too intense and over invested. I'd really pull back here and probably not meet as there seem to be a few red flags here and you don't sound comfortable with what he's doing. (Totally normal reaction!).

Yeah Rainy what OWW said, that kind of man is best avoided completely.

Pom & Rainy, I agree with OWW - red flags from both of them. It's nice to get attention from people but if they're too full on they're likely to either disappear for some reason ('things were going too fast, I'm not ready for a relationship after all, thanks for the sex') or be controlling.

One of the Golden Rules. If it's not fun, stop. That counts for a single person as well as the whole dating thing. Withdraw gracefully without blaming them "sorry I've met someone else", "sorry I'm not ready to date" (although they'll see you online again in the future and know either of these weren't true) or just 'sorry you're being a bit too full on and it's making me uncomfortable' - which is, at least, the truth.

No I'm not entirely comfortable. I did tell him i wouldn't do the same for a long time. He was ok with it but it's getting on my nerves.

My problem before was picking the bad men. The one's you knew were trouble but were exciting too. The last one ended really badly so i thought I'd try nice.

My guard is back up now and i will be treading very carefully.

Now he's just sent me a really sweet message that made me go aww. I don't even think i know what i want.

I think he sounds like a manipulative git Rainy, to be perfectly honest

Rainy, can I point out again - you don't know what this man looks like. You don't know what he does for a job, whether he's married, whether he has one leg, a penchant for kipper ties or a wig. You haven't met the guy yet. It takes several dates meeting someone to work out if they're actually who they say they are and the internet (and the world in general, although more so on the internet) is full of lying manipulative people who are out for either sex, money or power. Until you've had several dates, given all these red flags, you have to assume he's one of them, while hoping he's actually a decent bloke.

Wanting to change relationship status on FB is him wanting to crow about the fact he's pulled. You don't get any say in it. And you haven't met him.

I would be really very very cautious here. There are, as they say, plenty more fish in the sea. Some of them are even nice. Many of them are nicer than this guy sounds to be.

I agree he sounds like a manipulator rainy .. My stbxh was super keen .. Very sweet declaring that I was the love of his life within a fortnight .. I wish I knew about mumsnet then .. I didn't know that there were more red flags than May Day in Moscow

Got date number 2 with MrFixit this afternoon .. Dinner this time ..Can't really be arsed .. I miss MrCheeky .. I am not going back there but it is a real shame all the same .. I suppose it's the same situation as OWW and not so LM

Exactly the same Kirsty although I don't know if I'd be strong enough to say no if he came back.

It's a bit shit, isn't it?

Need to get another date lined up to distract me ...

I know it's not much consolation Kirsty but it might be more enjoyable than you're anticipating.

Of he turns up with oil under his nails and an anorak on do I have grounds to just leave?? (He has been working on his car and had an anorak on for our first date .. I let him off as we were going to be outdoors)