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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Dating thread 44

999 replies

lubeybooby · 01/03/2013 09:46

Here we go - all dating chat here!

OP posts:
Snapespeare · 03/03/2013 16:17

Just when I successfully manage to forget about green-wank-bag-guy...he crops up again... Hmm

oww I really really hope it goes well tonight. :)

KinNora · 03/03/2013 16:28

Oh yes, OWW, shedloads of luck for tonight, I hope he proves himself as the decent man he usually sounds.

ChooChooLaverne · 03/03/2013 16:28

Good luck OWW - I hope he's suitably contrite and you have a lovely evening.

KinNora · 03/03/2013 16:31

How lovely and lucky, ChooChoo, I hope the hours fly by to your next meeting.

Rose, wish I was coming for tea at yours ( although I have made shortbread and a Victoria sponge this afternoon )

OhWesternWind · 03/03/2013 16:39

That's the thing -I really think he is a good, decent man and I'm hoping this is a blip. He doesn't deal with stress very well but I can understand why. He's had a huge amount of stress over the last year, pretty much everything in his life has been turned upside down. As some of you know, I'm about a year ahead if him on this, my life is unrecognisable now from how it was a couple of years ago, and I know that at times I've not coped or behaved particularly well. So although this probably sounds like I'm giving him an out, I'm not, not really, just coming from a position where I know how stress can drive you to behave in an unthinking and crap way, though not with the intention of being hurtful. I hope he's going to have a conversation with me about it, but if not I'll have it with him. I'm not being a doormat for anyone.

OhWesternWind · 03/03/2013 16:40

Oh all you wonderful cooks! Am ashamed to say we're only having scrambled eggs for tea. (No appetite).

JulietteMontague · 03/03/2013 16:41

Lunch with Rose, tea with Kin then going on to check out the lemon roly poly with Voice. How did it turn out? I tried to make a jam roly poly once and it was not pretty.

KinNora · 03/03/2013 16:58

I suspect if I attempted to make a jam roly poly it would look like an industrial accident in a factory which has a blatant disregard for health and safety legislation.

KinNora · 03/03/2013 17:01

(OWW, I do think it's a blip with him, I think he might have allowed himself to be overwhelmed and lost sight of what should have been his priority -you, but I have been accused of being 'too reasonable' in the past so I'm not too sure how much notice you should take. Whatever, I have my fingers crossed for you Thanks )

VoiceofUnreason · 03/03/2013 17:02

Jules - pleased to report that unlike recent lemon drizzle, lemon roly poly great success. Yum, yum, yum. We'll be having more of this quite often round at Chez Voice.

In other news, I had a message on POF which I thought odd as I'd hidden my profile. Turns out I hadn't. Message was an invite for some singles event and I'd been invited because "you are 10km away from where it's being held". Rubbish. It's 85km away. POF needs to get their distance thingy sorted. It says I can stop getting party invites by adjusting my mail settings but can't see where.

Original poster
lubeybooby · 03/03/2013 17:04

it's at the bottom of the mail settings page voice, the one where you set distance and who can mail you etc and if you want to exclude the ones that do drugs or are married etc etc

OP posts:
JulietteMontague · 03/03/2013 17:06

Voice Yay for lemon roly poly! I'm vair impressed and you absolutely must share Grin

OhWesternWind · 03/03/2013 17:09

Are you having it with custard, Voice? Have you done it with lemon curd instead of jam? Sounds lovely.

Kin nowt wrong with reasonable. It's better than the alternative ...

mercury7 · 03/03/2013 17:10

apparently I look 'sexi' Hmm
he actually said 'u look sexi' Angry
when someone says 'u' instead of 'you' in my head I hear 'oo' ...like some sort of irritating baby talk Angry

why write sexi instead of sexy, it's just freaking annoying Angry

OhWesternWind · 03/03/2013 17:11

Btw I think LM's friend has gone home as there has been a conspicuous absence of silly status updates "with LM" today ...

Snapespeare · 03/03/2013 17:14

I feel the need to SLAP LMs friend.

VoiceofUnreason · 03/03/2013 17:16

OWW - yes, lemon curd instead of jam. But custard??? Certainly not. You heathen, even suggesting it. Perfection as it is!! Grin

Jules - only a small one as it is a test, but I shall be making one for sharing on Tuesday. Place orders please.

NcNcNcNc · 03/03/2013 17:19

OWW - not sure if this is any help or not but my DH was an utter wanker when we first met through OD. Well, not when we first met, he kept it hidden for a few dates to reel me in obviously Hmm Grin

He had a touch of Bant's famous 'sweet shop' mentality going on, drank too much, lied about some stuff and was basically a selfish twat.

However, his father/grandmother/grandfather had all died in the previous 4 months and a sibling had revealed a horrific secret about being abused as a child by a (much loved by DH) family member Sad

He is a different person now. If I'd done as I probably should have and dumped him then I'd have missed out on a lovely, lovely man. One who had totally lost his way through stress and grief and was trying to self destruct. We got through it and he/we had counselling and are now proud parents of 2 dds.

So.... in short, I can see where you're coming from Smile

Lubey - tell me more about wank-boy, I'm trying to visualise it.... Grin

NcNcNcNc · 03/03/2013 17:21

Snape - I don't like her either. I'll hold her down for you.

Grin
mercury7 · 03/03/2013 17:26

the sweet shop analogy thing..it seems mostly to be applied to men's behavior with OD?
so we have the image of one boy in a sweet shop surrounded by chocolate bars who cant decide which one he wants, picks one up, then puts it down because he see's a tastier looking one.

it would be more accurate, I think, to picture a sweet shop crowded with hungry little boys with no where near enough chocolate to go round

MirandaWest · 03/03/2013 17:27

I broke all first dating rules with Mr Nice. He picked me up from my house, we drive about an hour away went walking then to a tea shop then more walking then dinner and first date lasted about 9 hours. They were good hours though :)

OWW hope your evening is good. Am very full of Sunday lunch that me nice, his DS and I had. Currently lazing on his sofa which is good.

KinNora · 03/03/2013 17:32

LM's friend is developing quite a fan club here, isn't she ...

OhWesternWind · 03/03/2013 17:34

Thanks Nc yes that does really help. Really glad it ended well for you two. I actually think LM has coped amazingly well considering what's happened to him over the last year or so.

VoiceofUnreason · 03/03/2013 17:35

NcNc - I don't think I'd have stuck with someone as you did and I suspect you were rather lucky. He was certainly lucky you stuck with him. There's a difference between sticking with someone you already know well and have been with for some considerable time than putting up with twattish behaviour from someone you've just met. Anyone who has a lot of shit going on probably shouldn't be dating - you want to show off your best side, not your worst.

48howdidthathappen · 03/03/2013 17:42

I have recently returned from Mr R&Rs. Great fun was had Wink I love staying in bed all day.

I asked him if he would prefer we arrange the next time we see each other in advance, rather than my way by text. He said 'yes'. So seeing him Thursday Smile

OWW Hope you get things sorted with LM tonight. Glad you are feeling better.

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