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Original poster

Dating thread 44

999 replies

lubeybooby · 01/03/2013 09:46

Here we go - all dating chat here!

OP posts:
VelvetSpoon · 03/03/2013 11:59

Glad to hear you're feeling much better Western :)

I doubt C will contact me today. I suspect I won't hear anything tomorrow either. If I send another one then, I might get a reply by Thurs. I'd be happy to be proved wrong, but that's what I predict.

And I do know what I want is important. But I'm just lacking the opportunity to say it. I don't even really know what he wants.

KirstyWirsty · 03/03/2013 12:04

Marking my spot .. On my way home from girls Brighton weekend and head too fuzzy to keep up .. Will recap later

Snapespeare · 03/03/2013 12:17

Likewise glad to hear that your mood is improved oww :)

I don't have a boyfriend.... Grin he will not be my boyfriend until he voluntarily and without prompt refers to himself as such but we all know he is Wink

No word yet today, he as a really strange sleep pattern and won't be up and about until now-ish. It's 'his turn' at scrabble, so I guess he'll surface then. If not, I seem to be past fretting about it, at last for the time being... So that's good.

Original poster
lubeybooby · 03/03/2013 12:39

OWW yeah, you would think that given his taste for gadgets and technology, he might actually like to use them? But no! arrghhh

Velvet nope still nothing... I reckon he has too much going on and wants to dodge the 'when' question. But why not just say so?

Ah well like I say I have plenty else keeping me occupied so... whatever :)

McBuckers - listen to Bant about the first dat and keeping it to coffee somewhere nearby more options...

You might be one of the lucky ones who hits it off straight away and it's all fine, but when you're new to OD you are severely risking a first date shock and being stuck with someone awful for an hour or more which will feel like a lifetime... so just make sure you have covered the possibility and can leg it easily however convinced you are that it won't happen! Wink

OP posts:
VoiceofUnreason · 03/03/2013 12:49

Re: the whole 'meet for coffee' type date. What if one of you is travelling some distance? If you both live reasonably close, a coffee date sounds fine, but if you were travelling further afield it seems a helluva effort for just a coffee? I suppose the idea is you should both keep the 'after time' free in case you want to extend into a meal or something if you really hit it off?

Obviously my dating experience is limited but in both my OD cases I offered dinner and in both cases, very nice and enjoyable four-hour dates resulted.

VoiceofUnreason · 03/03/2013 12:49

PS This afternoon I am trying to make a lemon roly poly.

mercury7 · 03/03/2013 13:05

thats why i'll only meet someone if they live quite close Voice!

mercury7 · 03/03/2013 13:07

i really couldnt tolerate 4 hours with someone id only just met!!

Original poster
lubeybooby · 03/03/2013 13:22

Voice even if one of you is or both are travelling a long way, it would still be awful to be stuck in a bad date. The internet hides so much.

Cameras do lie, and what you think is a funny personality quirk can turn out to be how that person is, every second of the day. Like one guy I met used to act stupid. It made me laugh. It turned out he actually was stupid and it wasn't a comedy act. Or they might be a letch, have a grating voice or laugh, or have terrible teeth/no teeth, or be eight stone more than you thought, and because they took overhead pics, you can't tell.

Or they might have a complete personality change and begin wanking into a small green plastic bag while wailing 'I'm so vulnerable' then proceed to stalk you for a year (and that was a third date, but hey, might happen on someones first... fucking hope not though)

If there was a lot of distance involved I'd maybe relent on my rule just a tiny bit and say two hours rather than one. That could be just about bearable if it was bad.

I see the first date though as just verifying you are both roughly who you say you are and whether you have teeth or not, and if you take an instant, unexplainable dislike to one another or not. It's not really a proper date when you think of it like that, it's replacing the real life meeting in person that OD takes away.

OP posts:
McBuckers · 03/03/2013 13:50

OMG Lubey!!!

KinNora · 03/03/2013 14:06

' wanking into a green plastic bag while wailing 'I'm so vulnerable' ' OMG, he's dreamy

Original poster
lubeybooby · 03/03/2013 14:09

Kin yeah and he was met police as well. Siiigh. Thankfully in the distant past now...

OP posts:
KinNora · 03/03/2013 14:18

I have known quite a few people who married dibble - doesn't seem to have a high success rate.

( I hope he wasn't a firearms officer )

Scrazy · 03/03/2013 14:22

I wouldn't want to meet anyone who lived that far away either, sounds like hard work and if you do hit it off then it's going to be long distance which isn't easy, so why bother.

JulietteMontague · 03/03/2013 14:39

Lubey where did the wanking occur, was this is a cafe? did he hold the bag with one hand and wank with the other or was it more covert?

MsB I bet you can't wait now Grin

Original poster
lubeybooby · 03/03/2013 14:48

Juliette It was in his car. we stopped off for a snog, he got a bit er... carried away. Even my 'wtf???' face didn't put him off. Then he lobbed the bag out the window, dropped me off home and wondered why I didn't want to see him again!

OP posts:
VelvetSpoon · 03/03/2013 14:50

One of my Exs was a (former) armed response officer, but not at all the typical police type, which from my experience tends to consist of appalling misogynists, and indiscriminate shaggers.

Am reminded at this point of the one I went on a date with last year, who was oh so charming right up to the point that after kissing me he commented that I was 'very good with my mouth' and how much he hoped to put that to use elsewhere... Hmm.

JulietteMontague · 03/03/2013 14:51

Lubey goodness, what some people think is ok never ceases to amaze me. He actually had a bag ready Shock

Funny enough all those posters advising women not to get in cars with strangers never actually mention watching out for a ziplock Grin

VoiceofUnreason · 03/03/2013 15:01

merc/scrazy - I tend to agree with you, I have always avoided anything that could be described as 'distance', I like some spontaneity and not just having to write off every weekend to travelling back and forth, but when I get back off the sofa again I don't think I'll have the option.

Added to which, I don't like coffee anyway (of the small 'c' variety), so would much rather have a meal.

ChooChooLaverne · 03/03/2013 15:12

Lubey I'm surprised you ever met anyone OD again after that experience Shock

McB I'd say to remember that your first date is to suss out whether he's good enough to merit spending time in your company. I went on my first date in 11 years last week and it was lovely, so fingers crossed you have a better experience than lubey!

I was meant to go on date 1.5 on Friday but I was confined to my sick bed so had to cancel. I'm meeting him for date 2 next week but my babysitter has just cancelled on me and I really want to see him so am going to have to phone around and see if someone can do it. I can't wait to see him again, I feel like I'm about 13 Blush

OhWesternWind · 03/03/2013 15:31

ChooChoo it's a lovely feeling, enjoy it. Hope you can get a babysitter by hook or by crook.

Must confess that I'm looking forward to seeing LM tonight Blush

ChooChooLaverne · 03/03/2013 15:41

Oh good OWW, I'm glad you are speaking to him! I hope you have a nice time and I hope he's suitably apologetic. Does LM stand for lovely man by the way? I'll have to rename mine if so!

I know, I never expected to feel like this about someone, let alone someone I met OD and I have only met him once Blush

I am trying to be sensible about it but he keeps sending me lovely, witty, interesting messages and it's hard to not kind of get swept along. Have got another babysitter lined up, so it'll be all systems go on Tuesday. He won't know what's hit him!

EternalRose · 03/03/2013 15:59

Lubey - Green bag incident cracked me up (even though it shouldn't)...what a wierdo.

I hope you are all well, I am still reading but lurking more recently as got lots of things going on but thinking of you all!

I have the cooking fever, so it's Full Sunday Roast with homemade chocolate cake for dessert. Absolutely knackered today though as munchkin decided to keep me awake with her singing really loudly at 3am......'chicken and chips' was the song. Do any of you know it? Hmm

OhWesternWind · 03/03/2013 16:13

Great stuff ChooChoo! It's lovely (and amazing) that you met someone like this first time. Where are you going next week?

Yes, he was good yesterday and has sorted out a babysitter for tonight which is unheard of, we don't tend to go out when he has his children staying. So I think he's really trying. Yes that's what it stands for, so unimaginative but never mind! Might have to rename him after tonight anyway. I do want to sort things out with him but equally I need him to treat me properly. Wish me luck.

Original poster
lubeybooby · 03/03/2013 16:15

Good luck OWW I hope you have a great time and that he retains his title

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