So DH said...

[wavesandsmiles]

He knew I wouldn't want to hear it, but he really regrets getting me pregnant. I am 14 weeks pregnant with our first child, which we actively tried for. We each have 2 children from previous relationships, and there are blended family issues causing tension at the moment. I've been getting quite ill with regualr blackouts and am still suffering morning sickness.

We are going to try to make things work, but I am gutted to the core. It is not something that was said in the heat of a row, just in a "let's have a chat about what is wrong" talk.

I feel really upset - he is even talking about separating, and that his mum has offered to lend him money to get a deposit on a rented flat. We bought our forever home in October, and no way can I afford to pay the mortgage myself. I feel lost. I appreciate he is entitled to his own feelings, and to express these, but it doesn't hurt any less that he (a) is contemplating abandoning his pregnant wife and (b) has said he regrets the baby.

If he wants to separate, which he has said will be the case if our plan to improve things doesn't work, I really have no idea what will happen. I know this is a lot of what ifs, but the fact he has said how much he regrets all this, and that in his head he is at the stage where he has spoken to his mum who has offered him money, suggests that his mind may be made up already.

I think I just need some hand holding. He is/was my best friend, my happy ever after, only now it doesn't feel so much like that.

[lunar1]

Hope you are ok waves

[wavesandsmiles]

Hi all, just a quick update as on my phone. Passed out at gp surgery and ended up being whisked to hospital by ambulance. I am now on a ward with a drip and have had 2 anti emetics. Not feeling sick at this precise moment which is a result. DCs are sat with me, DDs godmother got them from school and brought them here.

It does mean that I have to accept help from "d" h as I'm obviously not at home. So he is going to collect them from here and take them back. Have also asked him to bring me pyjamas et as hospital gowns are a bit yuk.

I didn't manage to talk to my gp about the marriage breakdown and stress, i fainted too soon into the appointment. My mum is back Saturday and ready to help as much as I need her which is lovely.

Not the day I imagined but apparently I am very dehydrated and low blood sugars so I am getting the treatment I need.

Will try to read thread properly now but a bit tricky on the phone. Super glad the ward has wifi!

[DonkeysDontRideBicycles]

Take care Waves rest up and focus on yourself & pregnancy for now.

[tiredteddy]

Glad you are being looked after at the hospital. Hope they manage to sort the blackouts permanently. Glad your mum is back soon x

[LiveItUp]

Hey, you're in the best place to get you sorted. Hope your DC's ok with you in there though. Take care and get well. MN hug and

[wordyBird]

oh my, poor you. I hope they look after you well and find some answers. Take care and talk to us if you want to ...

[whosthis]

waves please think for nothing and nobody but yourself tonight. Other little arrangements matter less than your very wellbeing as it's for the tiny life in your tummy.

Therefore, please drink plenty of fluids and have a good meal as well as some decent sleep. Hope the ward offers a quiet environment.

Do you have some close friend to help out at this point of time? Don't hesitate to "bother' them, as they would very really happy to support you at this very moment.

[ThePinkOcelot]

Hello Waves, glad you are getting the treatment you so obviously need. xx
I must say, I have read some stuff on this site, and your H is right up there with the shittiest I have read. What a total and utter twat! He doesn't deserve you, and is worse than something you could scrape off your shoe! Bastard!! Keep strong! xx
Have a lovely rest tonight.xx

[mummytime]

Please do not be afraid to ask for help, even from people who aren't close friends. I would always do what I could to help in a crisis.

Concentrate on getting yourself well. I hope you have a peaceful night.

[GaryBuseysTeeth]

So, so glad the GP (didn't have a choice!) did the right thing & you're in the right place.
Hope your DC's aren't too shaken to see you all dripped up in hospital.
Have a peaceful night xx

[Tiggy114]

Only just read this thread but please be well x

[WingDefence]

Blimey waves - blue lights and everything?

I hope you manage to get some sleep on the ward. Please look after yourself and MiniWaves x

[JaxTellerIsMyFriend]

waves At least he will have to step up to help - at least until your Mum comes back at the weekend.

Hoping hospital get to the bottom of your black outs and get you well again.

[Charbon]

So very glad you are in safe hands OP.

[AThingInYourLife]

I'm so glad you are safe and well. I was quite worried about your health and keen to hear you were OK.

Thanks for the update :)

[Jux]

Glad you're being looked after.

Your h is a selfish, cowardly twunt. He needs to leave the house asap. It's what he wanted a few days ago, the twat! I suppose he expected you to put up a big fight and to spend the rest of your life appeasing him, and the fact you haven't has made him stick his heels in.

I'm sure you can get him to leave fairly quickly, once you're recovered and get to a solicitor to get the ball rolling.

There really are some dickheads about, aren't there?

[FriskyBivalves]

What a relief to find yourself in hospital, Waves. I hope you find some peace and respite there from your worries and troubles. Time for someone else to look after you .

Can we assume that the GP has written you a stonking medical certificate that ensures you don't have to worry about your work and your boss for the time being?!

[smornintime]

Blimey! Hope you're getting a decent rest and feel better quickly.

[wavesandsmiles]

I am looking forward to feeling better so I have more energy to deal with everything. Will be on fluids overnight, and seeing the consultant again in the morning. He came round this evening to order an injection because my haemoglobin levels were too high, probably because of the dehydration. So I have had something to prevent clotting injected into my tummy. Ouch....

He came up this evening - it was weird. He'd brought me pyjamas, and magazines, and stayed a long time. Eventually i said "I appreciate you coming here with my things, but it doesn't change anything. I meant what I said yesterday. More than anything when I found out you were researching late abortions, all the love I had in my heart for you was completely frozen. I don't love you anymore, and I want you to move out" I just couldn't cope with him being, well, normal, and here, and in anyway assuming that the drama of today has pushed me back to him.

I don't think I have a sick note - my GP seemed more shaken than me at the surgery, I was moved straight to an empty nurse's room until the ambulance crew came along and took me out on a stretcher I'll speak to the consultant about that tomorrow. DD was pretty upset, but they both did their homework with me. She didn't want to leave, and asked if she could sleep on the floor here. Bless her.

I'm going to try to sleep now, as I'll be having blood pressure taken and fluids changed in the night. Hospital beds aren't the comfiest. Thanks again to you all - once I am home I shall start properly reading the tips and advice and get my head a little more around all of this.

[lalalonglegs]

waves I salute you for what you said to your husband. You are my hero - I don't know how you manage to think so clearly feeling rubbish from a hospital bed [trophy]

Get some rest.

[whosthis]

Get proper rest tonight, waves . Only when you are well again, you would have the energy and the clear mind to think things through. Leave it for now and just go to sleep.

Bless you and your DCs.

[WingDefence]

Sleep well waves.

[Jux]

Waves, what a marvellous person you are. Your childen are seriously lucky to have you as a role model, and your h is a tosspot. What an excellent thing to say to him, and you being so unwell, too. If he hangs around he'll just dilute the superb influence you have over your children! I wish more people were like you. The world would be a much better place.

Sleep well. Hope you're feeling better in the morning.

[GregBishopsBottomBitch]

Well done Waves, your doing so well, i hope the reality of what hes done is eating him up, you deserve so much better, and i doubt all the begging and crying in the world could change whats been done, thats if he feels sorry at all.

[Bogeyface]

Waves, well done you :)

You are being so strong and to have said what you did at that time shows immense strength.

What did he say? Lots of uhmming and ahhing and excuses I bet!