The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Kicking The Wine Witch Into Touch!

[Mouseface]

Hello, I'm Mouse

Welcome to the Bus. We're a group of posters who have been on a journey to here, there and everywhere when it comes to alcohol and the abusing of it.

Some of us drink, some of us don't at all and some of us are trying to get there, really trying to just stop the cycle, break the habit and calm everything down. Some of us are desperate to not be 'that' person anymore.

One Day At A Time or ODAAT.

So what have you got to lose? Weight? Saggy, puffy eyes each morning? False friends? The risk of cancers and other fatal illnesses......... why not join us?

We have a resident MonsterCat, Wolf called Seth and Squid called Barry (best not to ask about Barry! )

And, if you want to see where we've been so far, the links below will show you. The first ever thread is the best by far, because the OP is just like you. And me.

FIRST EVER THREAD

PREVIOUS THREAD

Hi all - have been a bad babe :( too much to drink Friday and last night. I need to get back into the mindset I had in January. I sort of need to have a 'goal' or a 'reason' - dry january fit the bill perfectly. I am now going to do 'dry lent' from tuesday. i am such a useless loser when it comes to drink - i said on the thread so many times, i know I can't stop when i start, so why the hell do i start?!! Idiocy.

Aw eminemerdale totally relate , I was in my neighbours last night & had too much to drink and feeling awful now, hate feeling like this. I do feel tho that this bus & seeing a counsellor is helping. My neighbour said last nite think we need to go to the shop & get more wine but I was able to say no, think we have enough & I don't really want to drink more than we have. For me, this is progress, this is a change from the old me.

Hi there lovely babes

joey I don't think friend B is thinking about your drinking- she's thinking about how you've managed to stop /control and she hasn't, yet. I watched my friends carefully for a while last year and I felt strange if they didn't drink. I had one friend who had a real issue when I told her about trying to cut down. She make some nasty remarks and made sure my glass was topped right up when I was drinking. But it is her problem not yours. I hope she's having a little think about alcohol and looking to you to find out how to cut down. Also the anger/ negative emotions thing is weird. I've noticed it too- dunno maybe everyone just lets it all out late on a saturday night? Or maybe February sucks- cold, dark everyone's broke.

mouse and ma how are you both doing today? Hope nemo is doing well without the tube (fingers crossed)

faire thank you, I asked about you a while ago. Very interesting how people manage, everyone has a different way. I admire you.

em dry lent - good idea. I thought you'd been doing quite well recently so no talk of being 'useless' please! Not nice to hear you say that.

clutter good for you. Getting that extra bottle is never a good idea, speaking from experience, I know exactly how that one works out.

mouse so hope things are better for you today sweetie. Yesterday sounded so hard (( ))

guggs yes I think you're right about the letting it all out, obviously for the friend who is grieving it's better than bottling it all up; but for the rest I was just very aware of how much alcohol changed behaviour. It's not something I've really noticed before and tbh I actually felt a bit uncomfortable.

I also had trouble staying in control and not drinking too much - I reckon it would have been easier just to abstain. Gosh, so much to think about!

mouse how are you doing? Did Nemo manage to keep down his feeds?

Hello All. I've been lurking lately. Kind of thinking 'that looks like an interesting bus' but not really thinking wholeheartedly that I need to be on it myself. Well, I've got the worst hangover ever, went out drinking yesterday and really regret it. Once I get started I just don't have an off button.

It feels like I've been having a private battle with alcohol for years and I'm exhausted by it. I've wrestled the demon drink into some kind of submission and I can go for weeks without touching a drop, I don't drink every day, I can control my intake when I'm at home, but when I go out it all gets out of control. Consequently I just don't go out, so my social life is virtually nil. Anyhow, sometimes I get sick of being good, like yesterday, and I feel absolutely terrible today physically and also feel ashamed of myself :( I only go out on these binges maybe 3 or 4 times a year. The rest of the time is still a constant battle to keep to sensible limits tho and I get scared that if my life hit a hard patch I'd lose control.

Welcome Theartofloving Sorry your having a bad day, today will pass & as the week goes on and your body rids itself of the alcohol you consumed you will feel better and tomorrow is a new day to start again.
I am the same as you that I don't drink every day/night then have a blow out. I feel that because I don't drink all the time it makes the hangover worse as my body isn't used to it.
Can you have a bath, relaxed night & early evening. Hope you feel better tomorrow

Thank you for the welcome ohcluttergotme it means a lot :) I don't have DCs so I've been able to spend the day in bed drinking water thank heavens, still feel pretty ill tho. I have a healthy active lifestyle (apart from the drink) so it rankles to feel so bad, but it's my own fault.

It's pretty amazing to come here and find other people who struggle too. My friends/family don't seem to have issues with alcohol so I feel I have to hide the battle as I am ashamed of myself. My partner tends to drink too much, but in a different way to me, he drinks every day but not usually to excess. I can't tell you how many times I've promised myself I won't drink to excess again, part of me believes it as well, but it's my crutch in times of stress, like an anesthetic for my emotions.

I think it always helps to know your not the only one struggling theartofloving That's what's so great about this bus that everyone is so different yet we are all battling against our unhealthy relationship with alcohol. The bus is normally got a few more passengers on it but think lots of people are struggling in RL, hopefully will be more along soon to offer you some more help & support.
I'm off to bed now as had a bit of a late night last night and with lively toddler to look after today I'm whacked.
Hope all babes have a good nights sleep & wake up feeling better tomorrow x

Welcome theart and you've been very brave to make the first step in posting here.

It's quiet on the Bus tonight, where is everyone? mouse were thinking of you and hoping everything is ok in the mouse house

Hi all, I was on the bus about 18 months ago under a different name, fell off the bus and got left behind a couple of hundred miles. Reached rock bottom again with some scary symptoms. Hope I haven't left it too late. Never been an all day drinker but can get through loads of white wine of an evening, every evening. Slowly going to wean. I know my trigger is cooking tea, love nothing more than listening to the radio with a chilled glass on the side.

Tonight was the first step of trying to sort it, lime and tonic during cooking and instead of pouring a glass at 5, I delayed it till 7, only on glass 2 tonight when usually have been bottle 2.

I HAVE to do it this time, DH finally realises how serious things are and has promised to help when my will power fails.

Sorry for the ramble, can I get back in the side car?

evening!

red!!!! how lovely to see you!

well, had a bit of a struggle earlier, even told dh i was going out to get a bottle of wine, he just said 'ok' no arguing or anything, however, i managed to talk myself round, gave myself a slap and got my sewing out, it always helps to when i keep my hands busy - i am taking a few days off this week, i think a good rest will do me good.

anyways, those of you with hangovers, go to bed! it helps to get some sleep, the world will look a bit brighter in the morning, its a new day, a new beginning! i have certainly given myself a fright after my binge, i cant believe just how quickly my health went down hill, egually i cant believe just how much better i look and feel now, only 14 days since i last drank, everything looks better, my skin, my eyes, my hair, my back is no longer aching, my sleep pattern is back to normal, my feeling of being a worthless piece of shit is lifting. i like the way i feel now!

Hello theart. Sorry you feel so shit and I hope you feel better tomorrow after some good rest. I know how you feel. I have pretty much decided that I might not be able to drink at parties, or "out", ever again. It's ok.

alias I think, as other babes have pointed out, your friend might be feeling weird about her own drinking. Barbed comments like that - twice - usually mean something about the person making them. I hope you are ok. you don't need an intervention - you are doing it yourself!

Everything went ok with the MIL at the weekend. In the end it was lunch and we had lots of lovely cakes and tea and a very unboozy vibe so that was easy peasy.

Too sleepy to write now so very best to all babes and thank you to every one of you for all your help and support. It really helped me this weekend being able to share my promise to myself not to let the MIL drive me to drink.And that is just one example. Thankyou all for everything.

Red (((( )))) I've just returned here as well Tis lovely to 'see' you again. I'm so glad things are going well with DP.

Crap weekend here. So Day 1. I was going to write a long moans post but I can't be bothered with myself. DD woke - back later

well, after a day in bed followed by a fairly good night's sleep, I still feel rough, but better than yesterday. Managed to get a couple of crackers and a vit C tablet down me this morning and I'll get up and go for a walk soon.

Saturday's blip (?!) was bought on, I think, by an overload of stress and I needed to 'get out of myself' if that makes any sense? I have stressful change going on at work at the moment and changes at home as well, plus changes in myself (middle age). Change is, of course, good and necessary, but it freaks me out a bit. I spent some time with somebody I work with on Saturday night, at the end of the night when I was pretty tired and blotto-ed! Am dreading going into work tomorrow and seeing what he's had to say about it.

Wishing everybody on here strength in their struggles. Thank you for being here :)

Hi babes I'm back on the bus AGAIN. I have not been posting because quite frankly I don't really deserve your support. I bang on endlessly about stopping drinking and I feel amazing when I do and yet I go back to it every time!!!! I hit a new low yesterday, went to the shop at half past three and came back with wine, snuck it into my bedroom and drank it while tidying up. The fact that I can function semi normally on a bottle of wine is disturbing and I think I've went from wine swigging mother in a slightly jokey way to a depressive with an alcohol problem. I look awful, I feel awful and I hate my selfishness and continuing to screw up my life. I'm taking my dd's for a walk with the dog so I hope to clear my head and hope you guys can help me, I'm rock bottom, also having an achy feeling on the left hand side if my chest which is freaking me out. Please help, I want to change I really do x x x

aww baby!!! (((((hug))))) you sound low! dont ever think you undeserving of support! we all need each other, no one is beneath helping! i say that from the bottom of heart - when i first asked for help, and again 2 weeks ago, i was humbled by the amount of 'strangers' who were willing me on, sending their love and support, it helps soooo much to know you are not alone! try and take it easy today, be kind to yourself, you are worth help, support and love!

theart - i think i could have written your last post, i think im fairly good at coping with change, its when it all seems to change at once that i have problems, hang on in there!

Morning old and new babes, birthday weekend over thankfully, overindulged on Saturday night and wasted yesterday. Lent starts Wednesday and I am off the booze for Lent, going to post daily on here to make sure I stick to it:)

You and me both Baby

Baby I remember your support when I first came on the bus - it was so real and positive that I truly believe that you know deep down that you want to give being alcohol free a shot - and believe me stopping at 1 bottle is the way to go. I was still functioning on 3 bottles until that is I wasn't and it took over completely. Give it your best shot - use all the tools that you taught me HALT, Distraction, ODAAT, giving yourself time to heal, try AA. Wine may look like your friend, but as time goes on you find that she promises more than she delivers. At AA on Saturday one of the guys said that he put off acknowledging he was an alcoholic for so long - because to admit it would mean he would have to stop drinking. That's the messed up thinking that really drives us to rock bottom. RB is different for everyone it seems you have decided this far down and no further. We wouldn't be here on the bus if we had a healthy relationship with alcohol. We're all here for you lovely - I'll be back after lunch I WILL NOT BE DRINKING TODAY.

That's the sound of me falling off the wagon after Day 12. Bugger. What.A.Waste. Went to Sainsbury's and bought a cask of wine on Friday. Drank 4 glasses on Friday night, didn't feel great on Saturday morning. Drank 4 glasses on Saturday, didn't feel great on Sunday. Finished the cask Sunday night. I do have an off switch, but it doesn't kick in until after 3 glasses... (Kicks self)

Day 1 (again). I shall not be drinking today. I was feeling very embarrassed and a failure. Onwards and upwards.

Mouse how is Nemo today? Any better? How are you, for that matter? Sounds like some serious pain you're in.

{{HUGS}} to you all. We all need each other x

baby I'm sorry things are so bad. I hope you can find a tactic that works for you and that someone on here can help you.
Managed to get a GP appointment for my bro today by dint of telling them that we have spent the weekend wondering if he was going to die, either by his own hand or by the wine witche's. Dont let that become the future for your family.

Ma God, it's so scary when they get that bad, isn't it?
baby onwards and upwards. Get back in the saddle and Day 1 again. You can do it lovey.....

I just don't understand how, when I'm a reasonably bright person, this addiction can still bring me down so badly. I know how much better I feel when I don't drink - and still I drink. Three weeks 'off', (currently) 12 days 'on'.

Getting myself all bent out of shape as I've got a 'house inspection' (the curse of privately rented accommodation) on Friday so I really have to get my act together. I have no idea how I'm going to make it.

I feel so useless and pathetic just now.

Thanks you all for your kind words, I've missed the warmth this bus provides, I'm relieved to be back on the bus and all you lovely babes struggling with me, lets all try again TOGETHER x x x