The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Kicking The Wine Witch Into Touch!

[Mouseface]

Hello, I'm Mouse

Welcome to the Bus. We're a group of posters who have been on a journey to here, there and everywhere when it comes to alcohol and the abusing of it.

Some of us drink, some of us don't at all and some of us are trying to get there, really trying to just stop the cycle, break the habit and calm everything down. Some of us are desperate to not be 'that' person anymore.

One Day At A Time or ODAAT.

So what have you got to lose? Weight? Saggy, puffy eyes each morning? False friends? The risk of cancers and other fatal illnesses......... why not join us?

We have a resident MonsterCat, Wolf called Seth and Squid called Barry (best not to ask about Barry! )

And, if you want to see where we've been so far, the links below will show you. The first ever thread is the best by far, because the OP is just like you. And me.

FIRST EVER THREAD

PREVIOUS THREAD

Jesus - my darling friend, I'm so very sorry to read your posts. Not because you've fucked up, but because of the pain I can feel in the words that you have posted

PLEASE don't ask us for forgiveness, you have NOTHING to be forgiven for! FFS. You are human, you feel the stresses and strains of real life just like the rest of us, life can sneak up on you, you feel all chipper and hunky dory and then BAM (as you've discovered) you get a massive smack round the chops with the WineWitch's broom and you're on your arse before you can say Fuck The Fuck Off.

I should imagine you feel huge amounts of self loathing, guilt, shame, embarrassment etc right now? Well pack it in. Don't let alcohol win. You've been here before. You've kicked the WW into touch before and you WILL do it again.

You have us, you have AA and this time, you have DH on board!

YOU are the reason we are ALL here in the first place, these threads are all because of YOU!

YOU are the reason so many Babes are now sober, or have cut right back.

YOU are the reason my son is still with me, in my life, the reason that my DD no longer dies of shame because I'm off my face and the reason that my DH is here too.

YOU are the reason that I really do enjoy my life.

YOU are the reason that others come here to post for help at their lowest point and turn their lives around. One Day At A Time

YOU are the reason that day after day Babes are able to put one foot in front of the other.

Just as before, when you needed help, we're all here for you right now, for as long as it takes, day and night.

WE ARE ALL HERE FOR YOU.

Please, please try not to hate yourself. DH is still stood by your side, he's worried, not fuming and threatening to leave. He's worried that you've taken on too much and that has tripped you up. He's not screaming at you. He's not packing his or your bags. He's not the man he was the first time you posted here lovely. And you're not that woman either.

You've both been through so very much in the last almost three years, and if you start with the 'three years wasted' nonsense I'll be forced to introduce you to Barry and you do NOT want that!

You fucked up. You know how it works from here on in. One minute at a time if needs be.

Now then, I've made your seat comfy for you next to the window, we're off up to the Lakes today, the sun is shining across the waters there and the winter air has dusted all of the trees with a white, powdery covering of frost, you can see them twinkling in the warm, morning sunshine.

Massive hugs to you sweetheart. Please keep posting when you can..... we're all here for you.

Mousey xxx

Just adding my supppoer for you JWN..... Be nice to yourself, treat yourself gently..... Try and get some sleep and start to restore the good things in your body.

Oh and here's a ((hug))

• that is meant to say support. D'oh!!

jwn I've not posted in a while but reading your post I felt compelled to say you have been an inspiration to us all, we have followed your progress with admiration and awe, the fact that this has happened shows your only human and you know you can do it, I have not had an AF night in weeks but to keep you company and to prove how inspiring you are I WILL NOT DRINK TODAY. Massive hugs x x x

JWN Hello Lovely I'm late up this morning, so missed your posts, but you can be sure that we'll all be checking in regularly you've got a whole bus load of babes who will be here if you need us. On a practical point should you be at work? Perhaps just get things in order and delegate. As someone has said your body is not used to so much alcohol and you have poisoned yourself, get to the doctor and get a sick note - you need to focus on getting well.

I WILL NOT BE DRINKING TODAY

Hello baby sorry things are tough - What's the plan - is all the alcohol, in the garage, shed etc out of reach - what will you do this evening instead? xx

Hi green I have been really unwell with my crohn's and unable to leave the house and ridiculously I've been drinking more than ever cos I'm fed up and in pain and bored and frustrated. I'm on a huge dose of steroids which makes me feel very agitated. For all these reasons I seek nightly solace in wine, which lets face is unbelievably stupid. Anyway I'm at the hospital tomorrow and hope they can sort out my tummy and only I can sort out the "me" part. Tonight I want a nice dinner a bath and early to bed, I'm one and a half bottles every night and I'm deeply ashamed to admit that but since jwn has been brave enough to be do honest then so should i with you fabulous babes and myself. X

JWN and baby - ^^ what everyone has said xx It's so so hard, we probably all know that - so so easy to just think fuck it for whatever reason and go for it. Do not worry about letting people down, don;'t think about anyone else - you are the only ones that matter. Just ebing brave enough to post is amazing. You both know that what you've done has n't solved anything so you're clearly clever and lovely people. Stay well xxx

PS husband still a miserable fucker this morning

mouse your words are amazing, so true and beautifully said, I think you should write a book x

baby Well done for posting again - sending you healing light. Your poor body is going through so much - I can't remember if you have confided in your GP or specialist about your drinking.
Can you tell them? They might be able to prescribe something for the agitation which will take the edge off and help you to stay away from the bottle.

When you have a chronic condition, are taking medication and drinking a lot of alcohol - Alcohol has to make up part of the picture in how the condition is progressing/healing - can your specialist provide you with the best care and advice if they don't have the full picture? I hope it goes well at the hospital for you and you can start feeling better x

You are not alone, I have chronic gastritis - If I stopped drinking completely it would probably heal or be so much better but I don't.....

green thank you for kind words, I realise some people reading this will think why the hell is she willingly damaging her health even
More but it is a miserable condition and for a while wine took the edge off my pain but not anymore, i feel now I'm being reckless and I want to get better to enjoy my life with my kids more than I need to drink. Not much
Support from my GP but this is a new colorectal nurse I'm seeing tomorrow,i hear he is very good so I think I will have to be honest to get the right care. X

Good luck baby Life will get better x

green thanks babe means a lot x

Nah, even I couldnt squid a baby and a deity!
Jesus if it wasnt for you I would be where my brother is now, killing myself with alcohol. I have had most of January alcohol free because of this bus and the thread which started it. I have new friends, and now old friends, and a place of safety. Because of you.
Any more whingeing and I will forget myself and release the squid. You have been warned.

On the subject of epic fails, I am on a fast day today. I lasted until 9.15 when I was offered a bacon roll . A whole two hours. Go me.

baby my father has Chron's and its horrible. Try at least to cut down if you can. Can you do spritzers with white wine? No-alcohol beer? Leave that last mouthful in the glass, then the last half glass in the bottle, and so on. Step by step, mouthful by mouthful. Take care of yourself.

jesus just joining in with the support - you have NOT let us down, please don't think that. you took your eye off the ball - no doubt the WW was waiting for just the right moment when your defences were down - and BAM! before you can even draw breath, its one drink and another and another, it happens FAST!

I WILL NOT BE DRINKING TODAY

mA I'm actually laughing out loud x x

baby I find it helpful to watch this, especially the bit which says "It's simply time to let go of what doesn't serve me" Happy Girl (sorry for posting again!)

You are finding the alcohol serves something at the moment, pain relief, oblivion etc (at great cost as you know) so is there any benefit in talking to the nurse about medication that can fill this hole (without the hideous side effects of wine) - Ma that;s very naughty, but bacon rolls are hard to resist... Ah well have another go tomorrow :) x

Morning, tis me, Mouse

Baby - thank you lovely. I just speak from the heart. I'm sorry you are struggling at the moment too.... I also used to drink to help numb the pain, my meds + booze really did the job. But behaving like that came with it's down falls as you've read.

I hope that the new nurse can help but as you say, YOU HAVE TO BE 100% HONEST. Not just with the nurse, but with you too sweetheart. Take good care of you, you're family deserve all of you, and you deserve to be well and happy xx

Greeny - same to you..... at times, we are our own worst enemies and all our bodies can do is try to defend themselves the best that they can. Alcohol does so much damage, we all know that but it doesn't stop us drinking does it? You deserve better Greeny. Maybe it's time you looked after YOU xx

Ma - I am so very sorry to read that post about your brother. I have no words that haven't been said but please know that I am thinking of you and your family. You must feel so very deperatley helpless and frustrated with him? Or maybe you are just at your wits end now...... xx

I managed to avoid my usual mid-morning snack but have to admit, if I was offered a bacon roll, the diet would be over

babyjane no advice really, just hugs. It is a horrible disease, it never goes away but you can look after yourself during a flare. Its been many years since I was ill, but treatment and management have improved since then? Maybe you need a review of your medication?

I remember just after I had surgery, I had virtually no colon at the time (a temp ileostomy) was very underweight, and taking all sorts of drugs, I was of course drinking and got up to go to the loo and fainted (or passed out) our toilet was at the top of the stairs, lucky I didn't go straight down...

Ma love my food too much to fast for a day . . absolutely cant function when I am hungry. Having said that am determined to be good today. Trying to eat healthy today. No junk food and lots of water. One day at a time:)

baby and jwn

No blame, no failing- everyone is here because we have a massive problem with drink and we need some support. Lots in my case.
baby have been thinking and worrying about you,I'm pleased to hear that today is day 1- good for you.

I've heard people in aa describe alcohol as cunning and devious- that it has no respect for you, your health etc. Very true.

green I love that video- keep linking.

Today I will not be drinking.

Day two of 5:2 here......

Starting weight - 9.12st

Height - 5'6"

BMI - 22.3

Waist - wobbly 31inches

Hips - squidgy 37inches

Chest - awesome too big and too heavy for my back. I am trying to lose boobage too!

Goal - to lose the wobbly bits, tone up by very, very careful and gentle exercise. Keeping on the go as much as I can. Apparently, if you move every 20 mins, it keeps your metabolism going and stops slumps.

Today is a fasting day, 90 cals so far, crumpet with a scraping of low fat butter. Lunch will be a small ham salad and dinner will be half a garlic tortilla, with peppers, mushrooms and a small amount of grated cheese all grilled so that it's hot.

Will work out cals and post in a mo......

Two pints of water so far