The all new, sparkly,2013 Dating Thread - 35!

[watchoutforthatsnail]

off you go.

Thanks Kirsty and Woopsie :o THE dress is now my official lucky dress

Age Gap - Your opinions please , have a thread stating my friend of 54 has been online dating and got talking to a guy of 45 and he wants to meet her, she is very negative and thinks the age gap is way too big and he will just be looking for sex, that said she did talk to him and really liked all that he said how do I convince her to at least go and meet this guy for a coffee?, they are both divorced and kids older so no baggage either way .

Yoga and Nomore Good luck today.

Juilette I have a image of Mr Vague. It isn't good.

Lubey I think a fantastic afterglow almost beats the sex. Does make me hungry for more though

Bant Mr FU thought I was Fiesty. He is probably still in aftershock

Waves to Voice welcome back.

Velvet Honestly I couldn't be bothered with Spacetwunt. I would just send him a message saying I have moved on. Is he really worthy of any more headspace.

Wecanfixit, I would say that if I at 32 were to meet a guy of 45 I would be presuming they were NOT looking for sex because of their age. I would expect the much, much younger than that ones to be after sex. It's all in the perspective, if that makes sense? She's looking at it like 'ooh he's so much younger, he must be after sex' but I would be thinking 'he's so much older, likely to be more mature, not in his sexual prime any more, may be after something more'

They should definitely at least meet and see what's what.

I've read the other thread, why does she think a 45 year old just wants sex? Some will, most won't but that has nothing to do with them being 45.

Ahem! 45 not in sexual prime?

Not for a male, no! They hit it at 18 or something don't they... for women it's 30/s 40s :o

lubelobby - I agree she is looking at it from a different perspective but having only gone out with guys older than her she is in shock that someone younger fancies the idea of meeting up with her I think .

Well, for first time EVER, one of my huge coterie of female friends sent a text to me last night saying that they had a newish (few months) female friend that they thought would be "perfect" for me. This is a big deal because in my almost 3 years of singledom not one of my female friends has ever, despite my encouraging them to do so, pushed potential dates my way.

This person was X, Y and Z and also "intelligent and very pretty and I think you should meet her". I asked if she was on Facebook or whatever as, desperate as I may be, I am not doing a blind date. She prevaricated a bit and told me a bit more about her and she became less and less "perfect" as there was yet to be one mutual interest or common ground. I finally got her name so I could look through my friend's Facebook friends.

All I can say is that my friend and I have VERY different understandings of the words "very pretty". Now, I am no oil painting - I'm not Bant - but my three prior LTR girlfriends were genuinely "very pretty" so I know I can do quite nicely, thank you, on the looks front. I'm not sure how to describe this person, who may well be very nice, but she actually looked like a horse.

I have told my friend that her friend really isn't my cup of tea. Does this make me dreadfully shallow?

There is prime and there is, ahem prime with stamina .

Mr OZ was 7 years younger than me. He most definately wasn't just after sex.

I had a problem with the age difference, no idea why really, just prefer closer or older than me.

Voice yes, but join the club. Are you sure though, that she is not simply 'difficult to capture' in a photo? Lots of people are not photogenic, and lovely in RL once you have the personality to the face.

nomore Good luck today! Your ex-twunt has most definitely not destroyed you and 2013 will be better than ever. I can totally empathise with how much your life has changed in the last year, I feel the same. Can't wait to go back to work tomorrow but it's a little daunting! I've worked at home for the last ten years so it's been a helluva long time since I had to go out to work 5 days a week. Bring it on.

(And thank you all for the good wishes but I don't start til tomorrow)

moving you are not going to die from lack of sex!!!

Velvet & Watch I think I'm in the same boat as you - I've only been at this less than a year but pretty sure the man for me is not online. Velvet, I think you should try and look at it that way too, ie you are fab and doing nothing wrong but the right man for you just is not online. He's out there somewhere and he will find you when the time is right (probably when you stop looking). I'm going to try and trust karma and the universe and woo and whatever else is out there that it will happen for me eventually, just NOT through OD.

Juliette red hankercheif scarf & a trilby? Oh dear. Not. Good.

Lubey, Kirsty - how fab, not jealous at all

personality to put to the face.

48howdidthathappen can I ask I take Mr Oz did not last ? was it a short fling thing? or did the age get to you ?

Yoga the biker jacket had a gathered peplum

Juliette, true with stamina but I was thinking more sex drive rather than being any good at it... sex drive prime for men is very young I seem to remember, but for women (again drive) is older.

voice yes you are.
In normal circumstances I would say arrange a date and see - I don't photograph well but I'm much better in real life - but as this is through a friend I would politely decline as going out with her as not being keen could get messy.

wecan he could be in his 70s and be out for sex or in his 20s and be sincere. Sadly idiots come in all shapes, sizes and ages.
I think she must go out with him if only to see, in real life thay may not get on or it could a big thing but she won't know unless she gets out of the front door to find out.

sorry and not as

Juliette one of the 'joys' of Facebook is that if people don't set their privacy functions properly, you can see assorted photos. This woman may well be lovely but it's not just a case of "not photogenic" and I wouldn't want to capture her. I don't find her even remotely pretty, let alone attractive. I can find women pretty, stunning, gorgeous but not necessarily attractive and yes, sometimes, it's the personality that really produces the goods. But only if there is some physical attraction in the first place.

Wecan - I certainly wouldn't assume that a 45-yr old guy was automatically just after sex with a 54-yr old woman. But having had an LTR with a woman who was 11 years older than me, I wouldn't choose to do it again.

Grinchie - Good point yea they do come in all shapes and sizes lol! whatever there age , as you say she needs to go meet him to overcome her fears thanks!

Voice If you don't fancy her thats your call.

I can easily fancy someone that isn't 'good looking' if they are really good fun.
Couldn't fancy a horse though.

VoiceofUnreason, - can you elaborate on why you would not do it again with an 11 year age gap I mean the pros and cons thanks

in fact apologies everyone about the posts above, my brain is addled.
Ironman was over last night. I've had about two hours sleep which is all lovely but he's going away for a long time next week.

Velvet, engage your brain for a momment. How on earth could a stranger, who you spent a few ( awkward ) hours with, be any kind of judge of you.
Hes a knob. Probably doesnt want a relationship, just likes the attention and ego boost ( hence the hareem)

I know its not so much him as it just brings all this crap to the surface snd then its hard to logically see.

I dont think its good to keep texting him or checking his fb and would suggest a dumping text( and if you want to stick the knife in, say you met someone sat night) then delete off fb.

Juliette, thats rather a mix of clothes! Youare a brave woman!!!

Yoga, you never know :) i dont do woo. But logically, widening your social circle and going out more leads to more people contact. And some of them will be men. And hopefully there will be less cock shots or sex talk within the first few momments of meeting.