The way I think about it, now that I'm thinking about it, is: If I ask someone to go out for a meal, I expect to pay for the meal. I've got no problem with them asking to pay half, or for all of it if they want to make a point, but I expect to pay for it because I asked. I'll probably choose the place because I'm asking them to come to it. If they don't like the place we can choose somewhere else, but it's still my request, so implicitly I foot the bill.
For a second date, if they want to choose the place then they can foot half the bill or pay for drinks, whatever.
If they choose a cheap place to eat, that's a subtext that they either love it or that they don't feel comfortable eating expensive stuff, and usually unless they say ' my shout' then I'll go in for half.
If they choose somewhere really expensive, I'll expect them to go dutch or pay for all of it.
Mind you, my first actual online date, where the woman showed, and I experienced beer goggles - she paid for the meal while I went out for a smoke. I really hadn't intended her to, I thought we were getting coffee and saying goodnight. Then she drove me home. I wasn't sure if she expected to be invited in or not. Hmm. If the woman pays for the meal on a first date, does that mean she expects me to put out?
Oh as for feisty it just means a woman (or small man) who sticks up for themselves and isn't easily cowed/simpering. That's not the dictionary definition, but it's the one I go for. Feminism/Schmeminism. I like feisty. Speaking of which I'm supposed to have dinner tomorrow night with Miss Feisty, who I think possibly won't show as she was so horrified by the thought of online dating. Feck it I'll take a book.