Ginny pigs prove the options are of limited quality - Dating thread 28

[lubeybooby]

New one - chit chat all dating stuff here.

Off you go! :o

Sponge questions are good they help me focus. Yes Mr C asked me to be he's gf and I said no as it was far too early. He is rather controlling but backs down easily when challenged and if asked not to do something stops immediately.

No I haven't been on a date with Mr D as we couldn't find a suitable date before he went away.

Slightly confused please please note that controlling behaviour is always a red flag. They always back down at first too. And asking you to be his gf is another. So yeah, keep your options open if you have not agreed to exclusivity.

slightly am fortunate to not have experienced a controlling relationship, but having to challenge behaviour and attitude after 5 dates is a bit too much hard work.

Bantam hope you get a response from SurreyGirl.

I don't like fish pie. I like fish on its own but stop covering it in bloody sauce. Unless it's a salmon en croute, that's OK.

I don't like shellfish either.

Bantam any mention of rabbits is so obviously a euphemism for sex!!
I mean there's the whole 'at it like rabbits' angle, then we have the well known battery operated ladies appliance.

Clearly a major Freudian slip n the part of Scatty :o

As was noted up thread there's a note of urgency in the dating world, presumably due to the proximity of christmas...not that christmas means anything to me..I stopped doing it a few years ago.
Then again if it means extra sex with fit young men I'm all for it:o

I make nice fish pie - nicer than store bought stuff. Mmm, now I'm going to have to make fish pie sometime soon. Very messy & very fattening. Thanks Bantam. :-\

Someone was talking to a man who wanted to show her his giraffe but don't think it was any of us up here north of the border!

Slightly I wouldn't go on a date with someone else once I was sleeping with someone but think it's something you have to decide for yourself.

for me it depends on the frequency that I was sleeping with someone, I mean if he only wants to get together once every month or so then he's clearly leaving a gap that I'd want to fill up with one or two other 'friends'

Alright. No word from SurreyGirl as of this morning. Last I heard from here was a one line text about the neighbours being round on Monday, this after her saying in person and via text on Sunday she'd like to go out again.

So I was going to text:

"Morning, how's your Thursday going? My meeting went okay yesterday so I'm rewarding myself by working from home. On the sofa. Fab.

So I'm painfully aware there's silence from you. I'd really like to see you again, maybe next week, and thought maybe you'd like that too? Arranging things around both sets of kids, and the distance, is a sod, I'll give you that, but we could talk online or on the phone if you're up for that, and meet up when we're both free.

Could you let me know as I seem to have you stuck in my head and have lost interest in chatting to anyone else

"

Opinions? Would that put you off or maybe make you reply?

Sorry to jump in without catching up properly with the thread, but news a quick piece of advice/wisdom!
Mushroom man seems to be playing silly buggers, won't contact me and us all 'woe is me' when I contact him. Sometimes cos of work, sometimes because he was expecting me to contact him earlier!
Anyways supposed to be meeting tonight. Texted yesterday to ask if we were still on. No reply. Texted again: 'I assume that's a no then'. Immediately replies 'call me' -nothing else. So of course I didn't.
Still no contact today.
Now if course I don't want to see him, which is a shame, but there you go! So, finally the point, can I take up another date offer I had to turn down for tonight without saying anything to mushroom man, and if he does contact me expecting to meet say no, sorry. Or should I tell him first and risk being talked round?
Sorry, a lot longer than it needed to be I'm over thinking this aren't I?

Bantam I recognition only too well that painful sense that the other person means more to you than vice versa.

Then again it's very hard to know why someone is being 'cool' with you, it may just be that they are busy, or stressed with something.

I think the text sounds a tad 'heavy' ...I'd maybe keep it shorter and sweeter, kind of 'really hope everythings ok, miss chatting with you and would love to get together soon if you're still up for it'

recognise!!

Secret mushroom man is not your keeper, you're not accountable to him!
You can do whatever you like and you dont have to tell him a damn thing

Morning all. Loads to catch up on. Oh and I am planning a chicken and bacon baguette for lunch.

Bantam i think its absolutely fine - other than the painfully aware sentence which I'd delete. and the sentence about seeing her again - I wouldn't say next week, just that you'd like to see her again, and lose the rest of that sentence too.

The rest of it I think is fine. It might be she's busy, in which case I think it would be nice to know you're thinking of her. It might be she's worried about the distance issue, in which case your text should help to allay those fears. Fingers crossed it produces a positive response, or at the very least a response.

Secret mushroom man sounds like a gameplayer and hard work. make other arrangements, if he contacts you, just say you've made plans as he didnt get back to you in good time. He shouldnt expect you to wait around for him!

If I got a text like that it wouldn't

Thank you mercury I needed that! I suppose it's one of those hang ups from coming out of a long relationship, remembering I can do whatever I want without checking in!
Will now see if second offer is still free;)

Secret - why didn't you call him? I would have done out of pure nosiness to find out what on earth was going on that's too long or complicated to be put in a text.

Bantam, bless you but that text is a bit heavy. When was the last time you contacted her? Did you send the mail you were thinking of saying about being prepared to do the running? Or is this text your version of that and you didn't say anything yesterday/day before?

Service - you didn't sound keen on mushroom man to begin with - there were lots of red flags I seem to remember, and now he's playing silly buggers as you say. I'd take the other date for tonight and just ignore mushroom man.

If you liked him, you wouldn't call him that. He'd be known on here as 'FunGuy'. ahahaha. Sorry.

lubey - I didn't send that mail, no. Last contact was monday night when she said she had the neighbours round discussing some fairly heavy news she'd told me about. This is the text version of that mail about doing the running, after 2 days of no reply. Oh I mailed her on Tuesday morning with a witty story, no response there either.

It is a bit heavy now I read over it again - we've been talking for ages via email so it's not as if we're strangers. So I'll remove 'painfully aware' and 'next week' - how about 'stuck in my head' - bit much?

bant, that sounds good, bar the last bit as the others have said.
BUT, sorry, i think if shes not been in contact and hasnt responded to your other etxts, then she might not be interested.

sponge - how are you doing? what did you decide to do with C ( missing the L now)

snape - how are you doing?

My house paperwork is now in, so can every one cross everything for me.....
hopefully should know for sure if its mine by monday??

Totally not interested in dating at all. Have closed all accounts, frankly have more than enough on my plate.

bant - the stuck in my head bit is too much too.
thing is, no matter how much you email or talk beforehand, noone of that means anything and you are still strangers.... i think we have all fallen foul of thinking otherwise before, its very easy to do so.

lubey I didn't call because it was a demand. No 'please' or even 'call me and I'll explain. Besides why was he unable to call me?

bantam I didn't dislike him, and was looking forward to seeing him again and hopeful he would be less full-on on a second date. But, I see what you mean about the nickname, a touch dismissive maybe!
I almost typed LOL at funguy, but remembered I hate text speak!

Bantam, ok then... hmmm

Yes I would remove the 'painfully aware' 'next week' and and 'stuck in my head' then it's much more lighthearted and still gets the point across that you're happy to try and work around the awkward bits and want to see her again.

Good luck Watch
and I'm the same, if I have anything serious to deal with dating seems trivial and goes out the window...

....thats why I TRY not to take it personally if someone in the dating world goes a bit cool, it could just be that they have alot of 'real' (like paying bills & keeping a roof over your head) stuff to deal with

i just havent got time to actually date anyone. im working and spare time is now spent packing!!
and then will be spent moving, and unpacking and getting the house sorted, then it will be xmas. So there is literally no point.

"Morning, how's your Thursday going? My big meeting went okay yesterday so I'm rewarding myself by working from home. On the sofa. Fab.

So anyway, I'd really like to see you again, and thought maybe you'd like that too. Arranging things around both sets of kids is a sod, I'll give you that, but we could talk online or on the phone if you're up for that, and meet up when we're both free. Let me know. "

hows that?