Hat wars and soup-er dates, let the sausage see the roll... The Online Dating Thread reaches 25!

[Yogagirl17]

Erm...hope nobody minds?

I'm back!

Ahh damn that was good. Best meal EVER in the world ever ever (cuban place by waterloo, also hand for honour kinkyfuckery type shop)

We didn't get a chance to talk job/moving/blah blah, too fucking busy and vice vera! :o

A lot of the guys on OD are looking for older women, IME - I was pretty much inundated with young, fit guys...even though I put 38 or something down as the lowest age I was looking for. I've read similar from other posters on MN too...not just me showing off! Not sure what these young lads expect from us mature ladies...(I never met any of them...just didn't fancy it...dealing with immature guys...think I need head examined though now I re-appraise that). But didn't find that age was a barrier generally - possibly if the site has a search criteria based on age...dunno (I'm 41, haven't lied about it).

Don't put any pics of pets, children or partners' heads cut out - smiley pics best...not too provocative...looks desperate if you have a crazy cleavage shot (even if you're lucky enough to have a crazy cleavage!). Put something in your profile that makes you sound fun, like you enjoy your life and don't need a partner, some kind of 'hook' that makes you sound interesting or slightly quirky (but not nuts....it's a fine line).

KW Fortunately for me, I have a fetish for bald and flabby 40 year olds, which makes OD a dream come true...(not your ex though....he's a ).

Lubey Cubana! Pm and I went there for the lesbian birthday party!

Yes thats the one! Holy crap, loved the food so much. Real proper yummy soul food. I might commute there for dinner every day I wish

it's a smashing place - although the mojitos were a little light on the rum

I agree.. I got extra rum on my second round after complimenting the bartenders tattoo, and they also let me make a mojito myself I might have been a bit squiffy I loooooooooove it I want to go again right now. I a prawn starter thingy then had the pork with rice, black beans and plantain btw. OMG drooling now.

I'm 41 and didn't lie I did get some ones that were too old, but they were mainly around 39/40 to 47/48. I had my fair share of young boys too, though never replied to any of them as I wasn't interested at more than a superficial level . . . I think the youngest I got was 22, very nice looking too.

I'm not bothered about balding either so long as no comb-overs are involved! Short/shaved hair is fine with me. Flabby, hmm, rather not, although I have a touch of flab in parts, sadly. (Optician is not at all flabby, nice defined muscles but not body-builder nonsense. Short hair but not baldy. Lush).

seriously Why am I being winked at by a 64 year old woman who lives 60 miles away? I'm 38 ffs. Eeewww. I feel like responding and asking if the sausage can see the roll. It's too funny a line to never use just because it's laughably crap.

Gwan Bantam do it!

At least she's not after you meeting her cats for approval Bantam!

Another age liar here. I've shaved a full 3 years off. Fuggit. STBEx-H is 7 years younger and on my profile I'm looking for 38-48. I'm 45 in RL but don't say anything

No. I just. Can't. Do it. She's 26 years years older than me, that goes beyond cougar, puma or even jaguar territory. I'm terrified she might send me pictures of the roll.

Fnar, nearly spat my drink out laughing. So, that's the female equipvalent of cock pix then - the roll shot???

More like Bagpuss than a cougar . . .

I'm 42 and didn't lie. It was mentioned by two dates as something they found really off-putting and annoying. I know it's weird but I was interested in finding out about crap dates they had. One said he had the same face as me -->
on discovering that his date had given birth three weeks ago and the other (The Chemist) recalled a date with a WAG-type creature who clearly gave the impression that she considered him less than her usual type. Nevertheless, she was impressed by the fact that he hadn't "spent the evening staring at (her) tits" so that was something.

western - I'll never be able to look a roll mop in the face again

LOL @ "roll pictures"!

I'm 41. I don't lie.

Coffee, followed by lunch, with the geek was very nice. And I was right - he looks much better in person as he tends to smile a lot! He is very geeky indeed, in a slightly nervous, drinks lots of coffee and talks to fast kind of way and wants to fix every gadget within a 10 mile radius. But also quite sweet. And drives a very cool old falling apart classic car (still can't quite work out whether he does this because it was cheap or because he likes to fix it). Certainly more fun that staring at my laptop applying for jobs and benefits all day anyway. We'll see....

Forgive me for I knew better. Going to rant. Better to do it here than send a snarky text.

Flag 1 He was over keen on the contact. Did back off politely when I asked him to tone it down a bit so thought that was ok.
Flag 2 Confident workwise, insecure personally. stbxw had an affair so I excused his as understandale.
Flag 3 Only separated 11 months ago. He had recognised he wasn't ready to date again at last attempt 6 months ago so took him at he word when he said he was ready now.

We had a coffee first date set for 2 pm today. This has been set for a week. He texted me this morning at 11, "I am having an awful time, could we re-schedule please? if not, forgive me"

FFS

A while ago I would have been sympathetic, patient, supportive. Feel a little dejected as I really liked this one and I'd lowered my age range to 40 specifically to avoid the bottom of the early 50s barrel which seems to be full of sludge.

Meant to add that I'm 99% sure this is not some real crisis or that he had gone off me. When I asked if he was ok I got "Not really - I really like you". Well he should have enough respect for me not to cancel at the last minute or at least explain then.

Helen I suspect the only way to cope with OD is to treat it as a game, sort of snakes & ladders combined with chess.
Everyone (male & female) is a bullshitter until proved otherwise...anything they tell you is a combination of what they think you want to hear, and what they would like you to think.
I try not to have any particular expectations and always factor in the likelihood that plans will fall through at the last minute.
If they do I just shrug

Safely home to no-sign-of-returned notebook. Wondering whether to go to the gym or not.... He won't get there until 7, if at ll. I don't want to run into him, but I could do with some exercise...

hi all - quick one as my brain is fried and im to tired to actually think.

time - hope it went well today and its good news

yoga - yay, sounds good, are you seeing him again do you think?

snape - thinking ofyou.

Thank you. :).

Cba with the gym. Going to eat crisps and read and try to not spend night on Internet. :)

Snape - crisps sound good. How r u holding up? Internet is fine as long as you avoid Google, Facebook, Youtube, Linkedin basically anything that could be used for stalking not that you would but you know you shouldnt

Watch - don't know if I'll see him again, will leave it in his hands for now as am on the fence. I did send him a text to say thanks for lunch and he replied, thanks for coming then went on to talk about faulty graphics cards - told you he was a geek!

Sounds like a plan Snape, gym vs. crisps - no competition.

Mercury. Yes, exactly. Every 6 months or so one gets under my skin and I feel annoyed with myself for letting my guard down by cutting a hole in the fence

With my last actual date, my radar went off and I walked away from it with a polite refusal, he insisted on walking with me to the station and then stuck his lips on mine regardless. My mouth was clamped shut but it was still assault. Not enough soap in the world to get rid of the feeling. I suppose I was hoping that today's one was decent and its the fact that I did hope that has got to me.

How am I holding up? I'm functioning to a degree and nailing on a smile for the DCs, who all adored him. I get on the wrong train in the morning, I can't seem to locate my handbag, shoes that I have just taken off or my sense of humour. I am eating, but it consists mainly of toast. I walked to the station after work last night with tears rolling down my face.

I fantasise about him posting a photo of the notebook on his fb fb is the devils work at times with 'the most beautiful thing I will ever own, made with such kindness by the most wonderful woman I have ever known, I'm so sorry, I was wrong' ...or alternatively, 'I'm such a fucking idiot' but that isn't going to happen and as I also peer through the catflap before I open the door dreading the return of the notebook, the status quo doesn't seem too bad.

And I want to know he's ok, or better in some senses that he isn't because this is hell, but I think it's a better hell than having to live the lie of friendship while he gets all blissful with newgirl.