Huffy, illiterate men, scared of peas, it's a weird, weird dating world (No22)

[ChaoticismyLife]

Oh, watch...you mentioned flowers

Tell us more...

:(

It's difficult, isn't it. It does seem he has told you, but has he really?

The second time he laughed, the third thing he denied.... And was maybe saying he does like you, but is worried about the child situation?

sorry should make it clear, that's last January. 2011.

Oh Snape, it's very complicated isn't it. As I think you said to me at one point - 'the heart wants what the heart wants' xx

(the muffin was homemade by the way!)

he makes his own muffins!

sigh! and he's FRENCH! oh! the accent!!!

I'm not sure that's as negative as you think though.

The first time...well, he barely knew you, I wouldn't place too much store on that. The second, as Watch said he laughed - so that wasn't a 'no, that won't be happening' it could have been a nervous reaction? He might've thought you were just saying it cos you were drunk, or have been too drunk himself to come out with a more coherent response. And the third time - I read that more as him saying that he is definitely interested, but that he is being more cautious because of the children. I've been given the brush off by men before, and trust me it's been FAR more negative than this. When a man truly isn't interested, they will say so. I've had the 'but we're just friends surely you realise that?' and the 'no, I'm sorry I just couldn't feel that way about you' both of which are definite nos.

PMs response isn't at all a definite no, imo :)

My lovely Ex used to bake muffins. and he was truly lovely. It's a good sign in a man I think.

Maybe I need to add this to my next dating profile!...must be cleverer than me, earn more and have good baking skills. And be over 5'10 with large hands.

As if such a man exists

Snape I don't think he has specifically told you that he isn't interested, but I can see how you would interpret it that way. He seems rather clumsy in his way of communicating. The first instance was just after you had met, I think we can let that one go seeing as it was early days and he didn't really know you. The second instance could have been him not really knowing what to say or how to react, feeling embarrassed perhaps? In the third instance he actually talks of you being a couple but mentions it in a hurtful and insensitive way, by saying if you didn't have the children. The fact he refused to discuss it, in fact denied saying it, shows he knew he was out of order and regretted it. He spends a lot of time with you and your children, involved in your family, so we know your children aren't a problem for him. He comes across to me as someone who has a hard time expressing himself, his feelings and all that, with someone like this it pays to take more notice of their actions rather than their words, and from where I am sitting PM's more recent actions are speaking volumes.

Agreed :)

but he doesn't make his own muffins! thats a good enough reason to not do anything about anything ever!

But he has gorgeous eyes and lovely hair. And muffins are high carb so that's more than good enough reason to do something about it. Immediately.

I think you should stop believing he doesn't love you and start behaving as though he does. Allow some emotional barriers to drop.

Unless they are muffins made wholly of bacon....

he has piggy little eyes. :) He pointed out where his hair is thinning when we were out on friday... :p

my interpretation of 'immediately' is doing a page of the book when i get in tonight. And sneaky-watch 'when Harry met Sally' on youtube.

I get the feeling that your feelings for PM are so overwhelming that you would actually crap yourself if he told you he loves you and wants to be with you.

Agreed.
Again
:)

I think I would actually just burst into tears.

Notebook planning continues apace. Tonight will be from the English Patient, 'Betrayals in war are childlike compared with our betrayals during peace. New lovers are nervous and tender, but smash everything. For the heart is an organ of fire. I love that. I believe that.' I'll need to stop putting them on my fb, as he'll twig.

You two stop agreeing with each other. :p

No. Because It's true.

We shall be your nag tag team... :)

I want a little book Like that, It's so thoughtful.

it's potentially a friendship-breaker-book though isnt it - if this doesnt work, then that's it. We need to stop hanging out together so much and move on and try and have a life eleswhere. it's a terrifying book of abject horror!

I think, that when you and PM do actually get together, you will miss the anticipation, the drama, the whole loveliness of what you have now, I think that you quite enjoy the situation as it is, because lets face it, once it becomes real, his clothes all over the bedroom floor, wet towels on the bed, his farts filling the air every day, it won't be quite so much fun really. Will it?

I want a little book too.

No. It's just a book. He can take it in whatever spirit he wants....

No you don't. Because you are grown up and mature so this doesn't have to be a deal breaker. You have a special bond so you will work through it. Positive thinking, not negative. Please.

:) he's a bit OCD, the towels wouldnt be a problem.

No, it would be different fun. It would be having him there fun. It would be like when we wander around the supermarket and I'll look up and he's still standing in the same place unable to decide between two types of lettuce, except he'll be in our kitchen undecided about teabags.

Unlikely we'd ever live together though...

But you don't know that for sure. Maybe once the kids are older and there is more time and space in your life, you will live together. Who knows Anyway, I personally do feel that the instances you gave for not ever broaching the subject of exchanging bodily fluids, ever again, are unacceptable. So there.

Can I join in the nag tag team please? As I agree with all that's been said so far! And I've been saying all along it's when and not if for you and PM, Snape.

I wish I felt strongly enough about someone to make something like that, or was talented enough to execute it properly, a 5 year old can draw better than me

The closest I ever came was buying the lovely Ex a book of poetry, and marking off all my favourites

Yep. All are welcome in the nag tag team
:)

I used to do scrapbooking And card making ( actually taught lessons on it too). Did one for ex husband, all his tours, achievements, exercises, mates etc. He was not impressed....