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Original poster

I deleted a very suspect text

87 replies

Kingcryolophosaurus · 08/09/2012 09:38

I can't remember exactly " it was nice to meet you" finished with "kisses x x x"
Just one message, suggesting he had deleted the history
She had a sexy movie characters name.

He was out til 3am the other night, supposedly at a work do.

OP posts:
tzella · 08/09/2012 09:40

Does one message suggest that it was the first and only message so no history?

Not saying it's not suspect as he clearly gave his number to someone....

Original poster
Kingcryolophosaurus · 08/09/2012 09:41

Now there's no evidence, I should have taken the phone number

OP posts:
tzella · 08/09/2012 09:43

Is it still in the contacts list? You could note it down then delete it and he might not even remember he ever had it...

Original poster
Kingcryolophosaurus · 08/09/2012 09:46

Could be first message I guess

Should still be in the contacts list
Will try to get a look at the phone later
He doesn't usually leave it around

Then if I get the number, do I call her? Could make something up?

OP posts:
CajaDeLaMemoria · 08/09/2012 09:48

What phone has he got?

New ones, like Iphones, can be set Yo automatically back up everything including texts. Mine does.

I'd write the number down if it is still there. Changing it to your number or an unknown sim card if you've got one spare could answer your suspicions too.

I'm really sorry. I`m An innocent til proven guilty person but this has a distinct guilty feeling.

tzella · 08/09/2012 09:49

Looks to me like he just met someone on a (v late) night out, they exchanged numbers, she either liked the cut of his jib or thinks he's someone worth knowing in a work capacity and is following up with a polite message. Could be networking.

Only you know if there's anything to be deeply suspicious of i.e. this is not the first time, things have changed recently etc.

tzella · 08/09/2012 09:50

Oh, there were kisses.... Hmm.

Original poster
Kingcryolophosaurus · 08/09/2012 09:50

It's an iPhone but not that new
Where would I find the backup?

OP posts:
Original poster
Kingcryolophosaurus · 08/09/2012 09:53

Yeah, not just x x x, but kisses x x x
That's not really professional

And if professional, why not her real name, not a sexy characters name?

OP posts:
tzella · 08/09/2012 10:05

Sexy character? Was it Jessica Rabbit?

When my ex (from long ago) and I were falling apart (just partners, no marriage/house/DC) I discovered he'd been texting someone so I noted the number and deleted it Hmm We were in the same circle so it didn't make any difference and he and I broke up shortly afterwards anyway. She had a bf and wasn't the least bit interested in him anyway, so hah.

But as your H(?) was out so late and presumably drunk) if you delete everything it might just go away... Have you got other things going on that make you so suspicious?

GoldPlatedNineDoors · 08/09/2012 10:11

Someone on here texted the suspected "OW" with her own number saying "got a new phone, heres the number x" and waited for more.

tzella · 08/09/2012 10:17

Someone on here texted the suspected "OW" with her own number saying "got a new phone, heres the number x" and waited for more.

And? And?? Did it turn out as she expected?

EdithWeston · 08/09/2012 10:28

Does he have this number on a business card? If so, that's an obvious and non-suspicious way to get a number.

Drunk text from her? No idea he's married because all they talked about was business?

As you've deleted the text you can't ask him about it. Why were you checking the phone?

GoldPlatedNineDoors · 08/09/2012 10:31

Yup!

Original poster
Kingcryolophosaurus · 08/09/2012 10:48

It's not on his business card
The message was a new message last night about 6pm, so probably not drunken text

I don't trust him, but I can't put my finger on it
He's out a lot with clients/work, a bit too often I think. And catchups with old friends who I don't know that well, so I couldn't ever confirm with them
And sometimes he seems to go to a lot of effort to tell me who was talking about what

OP posts:
bogeyface · 08/09/2012 12:50

"I don't trust him, but I can't put my finger on it
He's out a lot with clients/work, a bit too often I think. And catchups with old friends who I don't know that well, so I couldn't ever confirm with them
And sometimes he seems to go to a lot of effort to tell me who was talking about what"

Your OP could have been innocent but this ^^^^ says to that there is a good chance that he is cheating . When my H was cheating, long before I found out, I didnt trust him but like you I didnt know why. And I also got the very in depth descriptions of what he did, where, who with, what they talked about. I warn you though, you will be made to feel paranoid, controlling and unhinged.

Sorry :(

BalloonSlayer · 08/09/2012 13:05

Can it not be a random text that appears out of the blue? It seems vague and catch-all.

I have had a few messages from unknown numbers over the years. Always with a vague message that anyone could think applied to them.

I did get one once which said "Can I come again tomorrow and wear that dress? Mikey xx" DH was Hmm as he thinks Mikey is a man's name. The only Mikey I know is a little girl. And if it was a man, why would I be interested in a bloke who wanted to wear one of my bloody dresses? Confused Never did find out who it was from. Oddly enough the number was one different to mine.

I have had other messages from unfamiliar numbers saying "hi just chillin" or other such stuff. I can assure you that no one I know would use that sort of teenagery vernacular. < snob > I have always assumed it is some scam trying to get you into a text conversation for nefarious purposes.

Tomorrowslookingfine · 08/09/2012 16:16

Why did you delete it, and not confront him with the text?

Glaringstrumpet · 08/09/2012 16:28

I warn you though, you will be made to feel paranoid, controlling and unhinged

Can you afford a PI. Set them on him for a week when he has client meetings or late nights with old friends and get them to give you feed back after a week or two. Meanwhile you can try to put it out of your mind rather than be paranoid.

LoveHandles88 · 08/09/2012 19:09

All texts and calls are stored in the call log on my phone unless I clear it. Maybe look there?

Original poster
Kingcryolophosaurus · 08/09/2012 19:48

I have the phone number now.
It's a contact, so not a random text

I don't know why I deleted it, I did it really quick, instinctive.
I don't know why I didn't confront him

Might look into a pi.

He's just been a complete wanker about me going out tonight
Seriously, I never go out, and just had 2 nights out on the run, best friends 40th.

OP posts:
sooperdooper · 08/09/2012 22:01

Why were you even looking at his messages? Sounds like you don't trsu him anyway, if there were no other messages it's more likely that there never were any than they'd been deleted, you sound paranoid and like you suspect him anyway, why? Has he done anything before to suggest he's cheating?

B1ueberry · 08/09/2012 22:32

Sounds like he just met this woman once, chemistry, he gave her his number and she was making sure he had her number in his phone. I'd save your cash re the PI for now.

Original poster
Kingcryolophosaurus · 08/09/2012 23:09

Sooper, I've said I don't trust him, I can't put my finger on it

Too many 2am finishes with work
Too many client nights out

He has form for lying, before we were married

OP posts:
Original poster
Kingcryolophosaurus · 08/09/2012 23:11

Lovehandles, is yours an iPhone?

OP posts: