I deleted a very suspect text

[Kingcryolophosaurus]

I can't remember exactly " it was nice to meet you" finished with "kisses x x x"
Just one message, suggesting he had deleted the history
She had a sexy movie characters name.

He was out til 3am the other night, supposedly at a work do.

ThingsThatMakeYouGoHmmm Tue 11-Sep-12 20:17:12
Both risky but both could pay off by proving his innocence or exposing him for a dirty ratbag

... and, of course, he could be innocent, and really very disappointed in you for doubting him.... and lose trust in you - so then you'd be equally miserable. Result!

At least he would then know that his behaviour is a cause for concern

and OP has, in that case, broken her relationship.

Balance of probabilities; he's both lying, and has something to lie about.

Having said that, if she's preternaturally doubting and keeps on doubting, sooner or later he might get pissed off with it, as lose his cool.

Personally, I think he's hiding something. But then, just like everyone else, I don't know.

So how do YOU suggest she finds out then be helpful lol

I think she should ask him. If he won't talk and she's unhappy about it, she should either leave him, or ask him to leave.

Yes, because he's just going to say "yes, I've been seeing someone, shagging, having an affair"

Of course he's not, he's going to say" I don't know what you are talking about, I'm put working all hours for this family, and you are accusing me of that"

Ask him as in "Show me your phone."

If she starts down the snooping/PI route and gets nada, the result is she still won't trust him, innocent or not...

I think he will be deleting everything off his phone
I would be very lucky to find anything
It was very random that I found this one
I was upstairs and he had left his phone on the bed.
Only just used it so unlocked

She could ask him as in show me your phone but wouldn't THAT lead also to ... and, of course, he could be innocent, and really very disappointed in you for doubting him.... and lose trust in you - so then you'd be equally miserable. Result!

Sorry but sometimes snooping might result in you seeing things you dont want to see but it can produce at the very least 'a' result rather than none

Sorry OP. By all means, try snooping.

I suspect you won't find anything, and I'm sorry if you do.

My concern is largely if you don't find anything, what next?
I doubt your mind will be at ease.

With hinsight there is a lot of things i did with my suspicions which i wished i hadn't done or had kept under my hat longer.
Unfortunately things dont always pan out the way you want or the way they ideally would.
Demanding to see his phone WOULD dont get me wrong, provoke a reaction but i am innocent of any wrongdoing and would still be pissed if DP demanded to see my phone. I delete my history every now and again when the mood takes me, not religiously.
However, whatever the reaction you get you could read different things from it, depending on your state of mind and other factors.
Snooping gets a result usually and although its below the belt it should either allay your suspicions or justify them.
In my experience, you have a suspicion you are usually right and so should act to protect yourself.
But thats jus' me

Go with your female instinct- my friends always swear by it since I proved I was always right. More importantly think about whether you want to go through feeling /thinking like this for the next 10 years. Once suspicion has set in, it is rather hard to switch off - in 'most' cases.