Honey traps and stunning women aplenty - dating thread 20!

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20!!!!!!

Bloody hell :)

Leuji I utterly agree with Yogagirl It took me 18 months to introduce the ex-after-ex to DCs (arguably way too long and extremely cautious of me..) it's up to you to decide if and when and whilst absolutely none of your exes business unless there is a bearing on his relationship with his children (and that is ultimately his responsibility, not yours!) I agree that proceeding with a degree of caution until you and the lovely Mr Kipling have worked out what's what is a very sensible attitude. Also agree that if it will make legal matters complicated, then you're absolutely doing what it right and best not only for your children, but for any potential future relationship with Mr K.

Sponge that was a horrible thread, full of absolute fucking bollocks from 'smug-marrieds' what works for one person will not necessarily work for another because while we are primarily governed by evolutionary urges regarding sex, it's a whole bunch more complicated than returning a call or not returning a call or playing hard to get or not having sex until the fifth date or making sure your pants match your bra.

Sponge, it was on of the worse threads I have seen. Ever.

Woman hating and any woman not in a polo neck, with no make up, hair up and randomly standing next to a car, to raise the interest levels, was bashed.

It is not you.

yoga There's lots of really nice Northern Soul, think early motown, but with even less productions ethics (if thats possible) I put that song on if i need a confidence boost before i go out (also 'Blondie - one way or another', which is arguably a PM based signature tune...) :)

Watch Mr Overalls really wasn't my usual type at all - not a builder, jack the lad type, and older than me too (again, different to the norm). but in his case it doesn't seem to have made much difference in terms of the end result.

I have tried daytime dates too, Mr 'I'm not ready for a commitment' was one, but there was lots of snogging there .

And on Tuesday I didn't even make a lot of effort or dress up, I didn't really want to go! I just wore a maxi dress so I was quite covered up, flat shoes etc. Didn't even have much make up on. Meh!

Also leuiji, agree with Snape re mr k.don't introduce until you think It's going somewhere... But equally, don't just not do it because you fear his reaction.

glares at phone

glares at phone

To explain it a bit more, and my concerns, ex has attacked me (and my dad once) at least in 3 different occasions in front of DS, which was every single time he was in this country after we separated. Except for the one time we met in front of the police station and he was still aggressive, and it was stressful for DS.

I really don't want that to happen again, at least not to DS. I'm hoping that ex does calm down with time and does find someone else. :)

Only 6 months ago he was sending death threats which included my mom.

As far as I'm concerned he could well f off to the far side of f and f some more, and I'd be happy to rub how nice this man is in his face. Except that if it wasn't for DS I don't think I'd really think about him again.

I remember that thread. It pissed me off. God knows what they would say about me have they seen my hen party outfit. Yep I would say slapperish. Going to upload it on here so you guys can see. I plan on of course being a good girl.

They would have slowly killed me. Snug marrieds, bet they didn't cover their assets when they found someone.

They have actually met, but it didn't register with DS. We were very discreet. (i.e. we didn't kiss, which would mean boyfriend to DS)

I think DS wouldn't mind and I have told Mr Kippling about the chat when DS told me (without prompting) that he would like to have someone else at home.

Ah, that makes sense. Though if he's not in this country there isn't anything he can do. Does he have In person contact with your ds?

Mrl was introduced as a friend. No kissing or anything. Dd worked it out quite quickly. Plus she's at the age where any boy who is your friend is a boyfriend. And you marry your boyfriend. Isn't it all so simple when you are 6. Lol

Lueji he will calm down. My ex was similar to yours and when I first left him he still controlled me because I was too scared to do anything that might upset him should he find out. It's a completely different story now.

How long have you been seeing MrKipling? Sorry if you've already mentioned this. I'm just thinking, if it's a pretty new relationship then you have more valid reasons for not introducing him into your DC life.

should quantify that me potentially sleeping with someone on a first date would make me 'feel like a slapper' and does not in no way, shape or form make anyone else a 'slapper' and additionally that 'slapper' is patriarchy-speak for 'sexually confident woman who knows what she wants and isnt afraid to get it'

as you were. :)

can someone just gently remind me of contact rules after-date? technically it's my 'turn' he texted last, but the ping-pong text thing is a bit dull isn't it. I have to go and do something else for a bit, dont i? to take my mind off of cock things...

watch it was so simple back then. Though in your daughters eyes I have tens of boyfriends (i have more male friends than female)

He can travel here easily because he is a national. He has sort of "ambushed" me once, so I expect he would do it again.
A policeman told me there was a warrant for him (not sure what type) a while ago, and I suspect he is afraid of coming here. But, for now, I'd rather keep him in the dark.

If I want, I can leave DS for the night with DSis or a friend. So, it's not that bad. :)

And that's the benefit of having a boy, who goes with me almost everywhere and has met a few strangers, men and women. :)

Snape Sod 'The Rules' just send him a text! You are a feminist not a wall flower.

snape - love Blondie! Go do something else. In fact, go do soemthing else and leave your phone at home!

Never saw earlier thread but sounds awful. How soon you should or shouldn't sleep with someone totally depends on the context, the people involved, what you want out of it. With GS guy who I'd had the relationship with over the summer, we'd been talking for weeks before what was technically our "first date" (I was away so couldn't physically meet sooner) but felt like we'd known each other for ages and knew straight away how much we liked each other....

snape a glared at phone will not ring/beep/play ringtone

Btw like your definition of slapper (nasty misogynistic word)

Lueji introduce Mr Kipling when you feel it's the right time. I can understand your concerns re your ex but I suspect he likes to think he still owns you and can dictate your life so I don't think it would matter if you did it after 6 months or 6 years iyswim.

sponge don't give up all hope but put Mr Overalls out of your mind for now and see what happens when he comes back off holiday.

Yoga meet him for coffee, you never know what may happen and it'll avoid that 'what if' feeling, you may get if you don't.

Morning everyone :)

I have just uploaded a pic of me in my hen party outfit if anyone fancies a peek.

Yep I am just sexually confident. Again. Or maybe for the first time in my life.

Bugger rules, text him.....go on.....I would. but I can be a little forward

I hate all these 'should/shouldn't' rules. Who decided what another person should do or shouldn't do and made it law? There are no rules. You just go with how you feel, you enjoy yourself, you live life with gusto, because it is short. If you want to sleep with a man on the first date then do, if you don't, then don't. Simple. What other people think of you is none of your business, their issues are none of your business, all that matters is what you think of you, after all, you are the one who has to live with you.

*Snape8 have you text him yet??

Morning Chaotic

Where is it MLM?

Snape have you sent a text? I am convinced you will see him again, and I am generally right just not about myself

Yoga I agree, that thread spiralled a bit out of context/control, with lots of commenting on sleeping with men on first dates etc. I don't usually, I've done so 4 times in 4 years. But as in that time I haven't ever had a second date, if I hadn't I'd now be 4 years celibate, which for me is frankly not an option!

I have now switched my phone off, as my empty inbox appeared to be taunting me

Hello all - just a quick pitstop here having got my DD's GCSE results for the modules done so far. She's done so well I'm so proud :o

I'm also very sore but happy

OK, sent him a brief email, with a link to something we were discussing last night...

subject matter 'I've got something to show you....'

message content ...but it's not what you thought it was, tsk tsk! ;-) '

MLM, you need to set your MN profile for public views so we can see pics. i want to see this!

where is it mlm?

snape - id text him, hes a feminist, you know it went well, cant see the harm. BUT - again, if he does contact you, you know its beccause he wants too.... and isnt doing it out of response... and because he does want to see you again. Sure i read soemthing that says 24 hours now, what with texts etc... and if you havent heard in 48 hrs then you are never going to. Maybe hold off until this evening?

Leuiji - agree with time, 6 months or 6 years wont make any difference, because he thinks he owns you. Im fully expecting my ex husband to massivly kick off when he finds out, even though hes re married. And he was physiucally abusive too.... but its none of his business.

lubey :) good news, well done mini-Lubey. :)