Do many women actually orgasm during penetration?

[pebblecleaner]

I'm not sure if this is the right board for this and will admit to nn changing for the thread .

So I have never orgasmed through or during penetration with DH (he's the only person I've ever been with). The actual sex part of our relationship is OK - nice at times and very pleasant at others, but not nice enough for actual orgasming for me during the sex bit. I just wondered if this was normal or not.

I only ask as (and I realise this is a bad frame of reference) I'm reading '50 shades' at the minute and will admit to being quite naive about things in general and one of the characters mentioned something about it taking her a year to orgasm through sex. I have no trouble orgasming before or after when DH stimulates me but for some reason even if he does this to me during sex I just can't orgasm and I stand no chance if he doesn't stimulate me.

Apologies if I'm being a bit blunt, or naive, or asking this on completely the wrong board. I'm just wondering if a) this is common or normal and b) if there's anything DH and/or I can do to try and work on this. I'm so used to it now that it's the norm but when I sit and think about it it does seem a shame if it's something that holds an obvious answer

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I'm one who has never ever experienced orgasm ever - one of the many reasons I feel a freak whenever 'girlfriends' want to discuss things as it is very isolating.

Any whichway makes no difference. Sex is pleasant but that's all - unless I want another baby I would not miss anything if I never had it again as cuddles are just as good for closeness.

Orgasms!! Its a minefield, everyone is diff. Personally I see 3 diff types of them that all have their unique qualities and combinations.

1. clit orgasm, which can occur during penetration if stimulated at same time but also through oral etc. 2)Penetration - more of a whole pelvic experience, deeper-routed, not always easy to get, man has to have a certain level of control and rigidity 3)Direct g spot stimulation (can cause ejaculation of fluid from skein gland :-0, got to 40 before discovering that one) The things they don't tell us what our bodies are capable of. Then again maybe that's just me. Life would be easier if we all worked the same with a rule book. Sorry if this is a bit blunt but I am quite open about discussing such matters, and interested in others experience too

I find it fascinating too!

Nope, not through penetration, although there has been the odd occasion when manual stimulation has made me orgasm while DH has been inside (mmmmm....). I do feel that I must be a bit of a let-down for him sometimes, his previous gfs seemed to manage multiple and varied orgasms through penetration and he was surprised to discover that I couldn't (or wasn't going to fake it... ) but he has magic fingers and I still get loads of orgasms!

For those of you who don't get off on oral, the thing that is probably missing is having the clitoris sucked. I'm pretty sure I could get most women to cum by doing that.
As for orgasms through penetration, for me, if I lie there and sort through the sensations that arise when I am turned on, there is a tingly sensation that starts in my clitoris but goes inwards. If who ever I am with can hit the back end of that tingle then I will cum. Having a full bladded can help with this, as well as (for myself) someone with a longer appendage.
I came three times the first time I had sex but have had periods where being penetrated has not worked for me, inenvitably it is a combination of not being turned on enough and being with someone who cannot reach that spot.

Now, out of the 3, which is best? Lol well, there is the thing, depends what mood you're in at the time. I'd say clitoral is easiest to achieve and probably the most intense, with an immediate feeling of relief and chilledness after. Penetrative is less intense but over a wider area and wee, just diff somehow, with a certain type of perspiration followed by a "isn't the world marvellous" feeling after. The G-spot, hmm, well a recent discovery that one, just something that happens really and is more the stimulation for it to happen rather that the ejaculation point that is the thrill I think.
It's been too long since any of it is the point for me !

fridaakahlo - i hate having my clit sucked, mines quite sensitive just makes me wanna close my legs, i think some girls love that tho, i just love pressure and grinding!

well, not wee - that deff does not feature in my life lol

some light direct clit engagement. But sucking! Agggh! I'm with you modi, too much, but roung in circles on inner labbia is fab

fridakahlo, you talk like a blokey man "hey I could get most women to come that way". Lol you know your own sphere of experience like the rest of us. Only most know you can't tar with the same brush

I once had a one nighter with some nob head and he was insistant going down on me i told him not to bother as i rarely cum like it and he said something along the lines of "i have a technique that will blow ur mind" let him try, needless to say still didnt work!!

Exactly modi, we are all different, I love it, but in a certain way and having my clit directly sucked eikkk!

I kind of get the two at same time being a distraction to either thing. Sometimes it enhances and sometimes it frustrates, again to do with mood and the big diff that we all must know is HORMONES! Diff stimulus at diff times of the month, diff bodily reactions from one week to the next and diff levels of libido. No wonder men get confused lol. But that should make it fun to keep them guessing lol

opentooffers thats true as well, annoyingly i'm at my horniest during my period!! and can cum in seconds when i'm on, usually not in the mood about two weeks before as i just want to kill anyone who comes near me!

lol modi, I used to get horny during periods, and during ovulation. Felt the best throughout pregnancy, whole body got sensitive and erogenous.

another one who can''t bear oral....I am FAR too ensitive and it feels horrible to me....and yes..we've tried all kinds of oral too!

modified, i'm with you there!! I don't know what it is, but I want sex all the time when i'm on my period. It's not really fair on DP though. Having said that, he doesn't complain.

bonkey you don't know how much the overthinking it comment sums me up - DH is always shaking his head in a despairing way as apparently I overthink everything

open the hormones comment there is right on - DH can find it frustrating when one time the thing I really enjoy the next time does nothing

So, out of interest, a few of you have mentioned experiences of 'jack rabbit sex' - so from what I can gather it's generally a teenage thing that men quickly well, usually realise isn't so hot for us and adjust to something slower/more grindy - whenever I've done this [the latter] kind of movement with DH he never seems to like it as much, do you think men adapt and get used to the different way as they like that the women like it or do you think they genuinely like it as much (they just didn't realise before)?

Btw have tried various lubes/virating devices at different times in the process and didn't get along that well with them, maybe just need more practice or maybe I'm one of the camp who finds everything pressed at the same time too much.

Love the mental image of the bed with nooks and hooks to stick your legs on whoever mentioned that

It never happened for me from penetration until I was with DP, with whom it happens pretty much every time, and very fast if we stick to missionary. Don't really know if he does something different, if it's just a good match in terms of size/shape, or whether it's partly me (I'd just past 30 when we met). I do find it very satisfying, and it certainly makes sex quite a different experience. The best thing is that it makes simultaneous climax very achievable, which I enjoy.

Ironically, I think he would sometimes prefer that it wasn't quite as easy for me and we did more elaborate things!

Well sex isn't a race to the finish! When I've come DH might get a bit more vigorous to get himself there but not until we're reaching the end. Slow and sensual might not make him prgasm but he likes it and it's part of the whole experience. I'd be quite unimpressed if he just started banging away because he likes it better!

pebblecleaner - Yes i do think men adapt to things. Before I met my current other half he'd never really been in love or felt anything strong for girls so sex to him was just about getting "him" finished, the first two months was awkward me on top him bouncing me up and down to get himself finished then screw me!! needless to say i wasnt amused!! so i told him it was no bloody wonder he'd had no proper girlfriend he didnt give a flyin fuck if they finished or not so i told him that me judt bouncing up and down literally doesnt do much for me, it can get me in the mood but it would never ever make me cum!! well this was nearly 2 years ago and he has now figured it needs to be slow with a mix of up and down and grinding down for me and he seems to cum quicker like that now as he knows it turns me on and thats a turn on for him to! you can train these fellas ya know ;-) xx

Missionary pos does it for me. Him lying with legs between mine so the right bits are rubbed, mind you I am not fantasising that I am in bed with balding old DP, but come up with a few more interesting variations

The mind has alot to do with it imo.

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Why is JOHNAUST and another poster (I suspect actually same one) going around resurrecting old sex threads??

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Not sure how I found myself in this topic but there's the option of the vibrating cock rings (durex have a few variety) which I have found works to give that orgasm during penetrative sex. In a way giving the pleasures of "Rabbit" but on a real person.