The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Starting the Summer Filled With Luscious Mocktails.

[Mouseface]

Hello, I'm Mouse and I used to drink far too much. Too much vodka to be exact, then too much wine, then too much cider....... you can imagine how it went.

This Bus is full of people like me, and people like you actually. Sober people, drinkers, a few not surers, and those who are simply 'somewhere'.

The one thing that we have in common is that we can/do/did/will abuse alcohol.

Some for a number of years, some months, some for their entire adult (and before) lives.

The support here is for everyone. Those in AA, those who are taking medication to help, those going it alone, those with the support of others. We're all here for the same reason.

Why not come and say hello? We are all so very different in our every day lives but we all have a common theme.....

And, for those who want to see where all of this began 2 years ago, HERE IS a link to all of the past Bus rides.

Doh! I blame it being morning

Thanks for clarifying and thank you for your kind words, I am feeling the nerves building now but I'm going to do it, just hope it doesn't all come out like verbal diarrhea (sp?)

Morning!

With regards to pubs and early days of being sober,I steered clear of pubbage.Lunches aren't too bad as most folk aren't intent on getting blotto but on the very few dinners out that I've had,I got really really annoyed at all the 'loud tossers talking shit' and also felt naked without booze in my hand.I infrequent the pub now because what's the point of making yourself suffer or grinding your teeth all night?

My main tipple now is sparkling water,it has been a utter need for me of a evening when craving white wine,it really quenches the thirst.Tonic water is another which I've drank when out,refreshing.

Welcome back Carrie !! I also had a lot of stuff happening (sister seriously ill 200 miles away, starting new job etc,) and I felt out of control - went back to drinking.. today is day three for me...

Good luck this morning limit x

Oh and best of luck and lots of strength for today Limit *gets the correct day

Thank you all. I will report back later I promise!

Another one wishing you well limit, don't hold back, don't worry that you're talking too much or taking up too much time. You are just as important as anyone else and deserve the help and support you are looking for.

Drinks in pubs? Whatever you get, order it with lots of ice and a slice of lemon or lime. I like soda water, or n&t (nothing and tonic), or lime or even plain water (with ice & slice). And don't get into buying 'rounds' if there are a lot of you or you'll spend all your money on other people's alcohol which is hardly fair. If you ask for tap water it's completely free.

< wonders if that is being money savvy sensible, or just a tight wad >

I am learning to moderate everything in my life because I'm an 'all or nothing' kind of girl. I used to do the I've blown it now diet where one off day would throw me for the whole week. Same with alcohol, well I've had a glass now, might as well finish the bottle. And housework, I now realise. Either I clean everything or just think the place is a tip and I can't find the motivation to get started.

So this moderation lark is helping enormously, I am ok with doing 'a little bit for now' whether that is housework or cake or wine, I can have a little and then leave it.

Saf the idea of little jobs you can turn to is brilliant. I don't need to complete the whole thing right now because later, if I fancy a drink, I'll get it done then instead. What a great strategy. And it really helps get the jobs done because you at least start it. Win-win situation, love it!

Right, waffling now when I should be on my way to work. See y'all later x

Thank you for the recommendations everyone! I quite like the idea of just fizzy mineral water with a slice of lemon. Sounds refreshing.

Have to say I'm feeling pretty good for having not had anything to drink for nearly two weeks. I'm looking after myself far better in general and I feel and look much healthier and energetic. It is the maintenance that is the challenge for me now however - the saying no to the first drink when it's next offered in a social situation. I'm going on a first date on the 23rd. A rather handsome man is taking me out for a nice dinner. We don't know each other well and of course he is going to ask me what I would like to drink. I won't be driving so that's not an excuse I can use. I'm just wondering what other babes say to people they don't know very well about their abstinence. I'm not prepared to disclose that I have a drink problem to someone I don't really know.

Limit I really hope everything goes well for you at the doctors today - come back and let us know. Sending you much virtual moral support. x

Well it's Friday - Yay , and the weekend is fast approaching. So how about we do some collective planning?

This is a great time to get to the shops and buy some lovely refreshing treats to drink over the weekend. Buy a big bag of limes, and squeeze fresh lime juice (and maybe a little zest) into ice cold soda / water / tonic. Add a sprig of mint. Fabulous. Or maybe make a big pot of peppermint and fennel tea leave it to cool, put it in the fridge, and then add ice and a slice of lemon. Or one of the red berry herbal teas, topped up with a few sliced strawberries and a slice of orange - so much better for you, and less sticky than a glass of pims. Or Tonic water with a few slices of cucumber and a sprig of mint? Or maybe ginger and lemongrass cordial (Bottle Green make it) with a couple of sprigs of fresh corriander.

Lets have an experimental weekend.

fuckit when asked what I want to drink, I often express it in terms of what I feel like in that moment -
e.g. Q: "What can i get you to drink?" A: "Gosh, I'm really thirsty, I'd love a glass of orange and soda."
Q: "Shall we order some wine?" A: "You go ahead, but at the moment I'd prefer a glass of lime and tonic."
Q: "Do you want a glass of this wine, since it's open?" A: "No thanks, it looks lovely, but I had a slight headache earlier so I think I'll stick to apple juice at the moment."
Q: "Don't you drink, at all?" A: "Not much, at the moment."
Q: "Do you want to come back to my place for a drink?" A: "Well I'm pretty tired and I have a lot today early tomorrow, but I'd love to come back for a coffee"

Fuckit how exciting, a date with a handsome man! Just tell him you're on antibiotics for a dental problem, that's the one I always use. You can quote him metronidazole if he asks, you simply can't drink on it, makes you very ill. As you get to know him beter(which I hope you will) you can consider what to tell him, but don't rush anything.

Limit with any luck you should be in with the GP right now (or sitting nervously in the waiting room). I hope that when you emerge, you'll feel a weight has been lifted and we want to hear all about it. AFDs by the way are Alcohol Free Days. Mine are stacking up!

Re: pubs (in which I spent most of my teens, 20s, 30s and early 40s), I tend to steer clear unless it's lunch time and then can just use the excuse of I hate drinking at lunch-time because it makes me sleepy and just have a snack. I don't arrange to meet people in the pub in the evening anymore but since I'm in my 50s I suppose that's quite normal - harder if you're younger and still part of pub culture.

Welcome back Carrie, have a lovely weekend all to yourself. When DD is with her dad I do a lot around the house, make sure I've arranged to meet a friend for coffee and then just revel in doing exactly what I want to do. It obviously used to be a major trigger for drinking but not now.

Am sticking to 15mg of diazepam until I see the GP on Wednesday and will then discuss with her a plan for coming off. I'm not overly concerned I won't be able to do it - I was also prescribed a load of co-codamol recently for dental pain but now I'm pain free and I had loads left and I just chucked them away (the codeine in this medication is quite strong I would have been tempted to keep taking it). I'm enjoying my new life too much to want to jeopardize the future with another addiction. I must say I'd find it hard to do without my two (or sometimes three) strong cups of coffee every morning but ain't going to beat myself up over that!

The excitement in the Soma household is mounting - we're going to buy Albert (DD wants to rename him Archie:))all his supplies tomorrow as well as do a last visit at the rescue before he comes home next Saturday. We want to crate train him and I had an argument with a friend last night who thinks they're cruel but I've done a lot of research and the current concensus seems to be that they're a very good idea and that dogs love them as they see them as their safe place. He woldn't be in it for more than three hours at a time. I can't wait to have the little man in our all-girl household!

Happy Friday everyone, hope all good with you Mia. xx

Some lovely ideas there Venus. Never thought of putting herbal tea in the fridge to chill before and adding fruit and herbs. Brilliant - am definitely going to try that!

I like your reponses to the 'what are you drinking?' question too. I don't want to say, 'I don't drink' because the next question will inevitably be 'why?'

Thanks Soba too. The anti-biotics excuse is a really good one, because it's unarguable with isn't it. No-one can say, 'Oh go on, just one'.

It's so great to be able to come here with questions about how to handle early sobriety and get so many different ideas from different people. Thanks everyone.

morning everyone. How did you get on at the GP limit very brave of you to make that step!

Another sleepless night for me, my dog was scratching and chewing his paws and generally being neurotic. Suspect a grass allergy.

I have a Plan for tonight and a long-term Goal!

Plan

Agreed with DH that he will not drink the whole bottle of wine. Since its red, I'm unlikely to want it, but its there if I really want a glass. I will not go and buy my own bottle of white. Instead I'm going to stock up on soft drinks, ice-cream and chocolate. And I will get on the bus.

Goal

I would like eventually to be able to drink a glass of two of Pinot Grigio or whatever. But right now I don't feel I can control the situation or myself. I'm going to spend some time breaking the habit of drinking when I'm tired/upset/with the in-laws. I've heard it can take 6 weeks - 3 months to break a habit (I suppose it depends on the strength of your addiction) I'm aiming for no alcohol at least until my birthday in 1 month. I will find out what the triggers are and new ways to deal with them.

Hi everyone! I am back.

Appointment was at 9am and I was unexpectedly buzzed in at 8.55; this was actually helpful as my nerves were starting to build, although I did almost jump out of my seat when I saw my name called.

Saw a GP I have seen before and he was friendly enough so I just told him "I need help to stop drinking" then a lot poured out, I cried a little a bit. He was lovely and let me talk; asked gentle questions, said I was doing the right thing. I was totally honest with him and it felt really good to be that way; I have lied and lied about my drinking for so long now it was like a pressure release..does that make sense?

Anyway; he has booked me in for a blood test to assess the damage to my liver..I am really dreading this as I'm sure my poor liver is knackered now. Its for Wednesday at 10.20am.

He also asked me to self refer to a local community alcohol service, he is going to be writing to them anyway but said it was quicker if I phoned them myself.

I talked about my worries about my job; and the implications of admitting to my problem. He has signed me off for the next two weeks and wants to see me afterwards. What was really nice was that he asked me what I wanted to be put on my sick note and signed me off with depression.

I have been prescribed 20mg Fluoxetine daily.

I have now phoned in work and informed them I have been signed off. have to send my note in to my manager but at least this means I am not avoiding his calls anymore, so one less stress factor.

Went shopping afterwards and stocked up on more non-alcoholic drinks but also bought myself ONE bottle of low alcohol wine..only ONE.

Came home and phoned the community service people, they have taken my number and I am waiting for someone to get back to me today. They also said it was quicker for me to self refer so I'm glad I did.

Wow! I can't believe I am finally starting to tackle this and how painless it actually was. I know there is a long road ahead of me though but I feel so positive today.

I urge anyone else thinking about it to please make that first step, it really wasn't as painful as I thought it would be, I swear!

Oh and my Amazon Books have arrived today so I'm looking forward to getting stuck in to those.

to everyone for your support so far it really has meant a lot to me X

that's great limit I'm so glad you found someone supportive!

what books did you order?

Hi Joey the book I ordered were recommended by soma about page 4 of this thread I think? "Cleaning up" by Tania Clyde and "Drinking- a Love Story" by Caroline Knapp.

I have not started them yet but I have a few hours this afternoon where I will just curl up and have a go.

I was really surprised with GP today Joey, and glad I went today.

Not heard back from Community Team yet though but hopefully sometime today.

Sorry Joey it was page 5 not 4.

I ordered them that day and they arrived today..quite timely I think

I'm really pleased for you Limit Well done for admitting you have a problem,makes you wonder why you didn't ask for help and support before huh?

I'll raise my sparkling water to your new life journey!

Oh and try not to worry about your Liver function test.The liver is marvellous organ and you really have to be caning it for a very long time for it to be showing signs of irrepairable damage.

Breaking the habit is so important Joey so I think you're right to completely abstain for a period of time. I can appreciate now how much of a habit it was for me and that changing the daily cycle of giving in to a drink has started to change my way of thinking. Rooting for you. PS it's Tania Glyde not Clyde.

I'm really glad it went well for you Limit, your GP has done all the right things and sounds great. Agree with Annie (please drop the Arsehole!) don't fret about your LFT, I've been caning it for nearly 40 years and mine's fine. Even if there are signs of damage it does have the ability to heal itself if you stop. You'll enjoy the books so much, but should mention that very sadly Carloline Knapp died not long after she stopped drinking - and it wasn't down to the booze either, she had lung cancer! Life is SUCH a bitch. But here you are, doing something about it at last! Excited for you and there are only good things ahead. x

limit I am so pleased for you - firstly that you were brave and went to the doc, and told all; and secondly that you got such a positive (and appropriate) response. It is such a pity that not all medical professionals are so supportive, understanding or well trained in this matter.

A few thoughts from an 'old hand' - I really hope that the community alcohol service get back to you today but just in case they don't - keep positive. They will get back to you, so don't panic if it is not immediate, and whatever you do, don't let a slight delay derail you from your plans and optimism. Even if you have to wait over the weekend, there are lots of us here to support you, and encourage you.

And the other thing is about the LFT. It is a bit of double-edged sword: you dread an abnormal result, worrying about how you might have damaged your liver, and whether you will be one of the small number of people for whom the damage is irreversible. And the risk is that you get so wound up about the test that you calm yourself in the best way you know - by drinking. Then, if by some stroke of luck your LFT comes back 'normal', you heave a huge sigh of relief and think, phew, I have an amazing body, I can feel free to carry on drinking at the same levels.

I'm posting my thoughts because I've been there (and got through it). You will too limit.

limit So glad to hear the appointment went well, the GP sounds great. You are sounding so positive and have put a smile on my face :)

venus, I love your suggestions for non-alcoholic drinks. I'm going to make some of those this weekend as I'm so bored of Diet Coke.

Nonastemia Thank you, I DO have trouble accepting a complete lack of substances at a social occasion. I felt really spaced-out all of yesterday after the spliff on Weds so hopefully I will remember that the next time I'm tempted.

Going out for Vietnamese food with my NCT group tonight- they are a very boozy bunch. I'm going to drive so that I won't drink. Looking forward to enjoying the food (think I will probably focus more on the fantastic flavours if I'm not distracted by wine). Looking forward to not spending too much money, not having to get a late night train home, not having a hangover in the morning. Lots to look forward to. 6th booze-free day here; very pleased.

I can't keep up with you lot so I'm sorry to all those I've failed to 'namecheck'.

Afternoon, tis me, Mouse

Just popping in to say that I'm off to the docs to beg for better pain meds after another horrific night with unbearable pain and being unable to move. I'm going to ask about Fentanyl. Wish me luck.

long long long couple of weeks

I've been here reading though, and thank you all for your kind messages.

Feeling numb still but going through the motions.

Drinking not good

DP offered some commitment - no not a proposal you mental women!

He's parked his bike here................

xxxxxxxxxxxxx

good to see you again silver

I have 1 bottle elderflower & 1 bottle raspberry and lemon soda
2 tubs of ice-cream
3 bars of chocolate
a chocolate pudding

and, of course, The Bus

I don't even like red wine. I only used to drink some if there was nothing else around. DH is welcome to it.

Actually, even though I don't want it, the very idea that there is wine being drunk in the house by someone else is kinda weird!

Hope you get the fentanyl Mouse - it works really well for some people and with a patch you can just leave it on for 3 days or so.