The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Starting the Summer Filled With Luscious Mocktails.

[Mouseface]

Hello, I'm Mouse and I used to drink far too much. Too much vodka to be exact, then too much wine, then too much cider....... you can imagine how it went.

This Bus is full of people like me, and people like you actually. Sober people, drinkers, a few not surers, and those who are simply 'somewhere'.

The one thing that we have in common is that we can/do/did/will abuse alcohol.

Some for a number of years, some months, some for their entire adult (and before) lives.

The support here is for everyone. Those in AA, those who are taking medication to help, those going it alone, those with the support of others. We're all here for the same reason.

Why not come and say hello? We are all so very different in our every day lives but we all have a common theme.....

And, for those who want to see where all of this began 2 years ago, HERE IS a link to all of the past Bus rides.

Morning everyone, it was so quiet last night I thought I would have to drive the bus, and was about to dig out my peaked cap... but I see people are back this morning.

mia I don't really like listening to anything at night although I've tried some self-hypnosis tapes. I don't want to keep my husband awake, but don't like headphones...

I think its just another bad habit I've got into....

Is it bright an sunny on your side of the water ma? Lovely day here - washing out on the line and full of the joys of spring summer.

msgee I read somewhere recently about grief and anger, where it was saying that just passively waiting for time to pass hoping that grief goes away is a bit ineffective, and that sometimes it is helpful to be active in responding - so acknowledging your feelings - doing something with that hot energy if you are angry; having a place to go, or something to touch if you are feeling particularly sad - and then for each individual feeling, recognising when you have moved away from the intensity of it for that moment. E.g. knowing when the heat of your anger has passed and letting the emotion subside, or feeling when your sadness has softened a little and you can leave your special place or object. It won't take those feelings away for ever, but sometimes helps to move through the roller-coaster.

Great advice as usual from venus! How on earth did you get to be so wise, woman?!

joey I'm not wild about headphones either because I've got odd shaped ears but with the ipod I just put one headphone loosely in one ear so I can lie on my side if I want - it's not going to fall out because I'm lying down so it doesn't have to be right in there iyswim. It's the act of concentrating on something other than not sleeping/wanting to sleep/why can't I bloody sleep/ all the other anxious and obsessive thoughts in my head. I tried listening to music or radio podcasts but that didn't do it for me. It's the having to concentrate and try to recall something that makes me drift off.

I'm having a bit of a lull in my manic positivity of late. Could someone please reassure me that it's totally normal to feel a bit quieter, lower energy, sad, worried sometimes, and that it doesn't mean that I shouldn't have lowered my AD dose and now I'm going to plunge back into deep dark depression and everything I've achieved lately is going to slip away??

mia I've had many, many years upon this earth [old woman emoticon], and I have a very unhealthy interest in anything that is not what I should be doing [expert procrastinator emoticon]

I think that sometimes feeling quiet, low energy, and a bit sad is my body's way of telling me to take it easy, have a rest, contemplate the world and my navel, and dream gently of my next project. In a world which is busy, busy, busy, we can feel under pressure to be always on and always achieving and always exuberant and happy. Sometimes it is right to stop and watch the clouds, or in your case mia to lay by your pond and watch the dragonflies, and listen to the noise of nature

Hello All and hope you are all well this sunny morning.

I am feeling much brighter today (Monday spent in the horrors) and did not have a drink last night. I will not tonight either. I have made that decision and I am sticking to it .

My BIL is very poorly and is scheduled to have surgery today. I went to see him yesterday and he is very emotional and scared. His sons were there too so he tried to keep some of his fears to himself but I think we are all terrified. Fingers crossed for today's surgery.

Onwards and upwards!

it could be normal mia but since I've known you, you've changed your meds several times in a few months. I'm no expert (despite trying to sound like one ) but I'd have thought you ought to stick with a dosage for at least 6 months before fiddling with it.

yes venus a lovely sunny day. No hangover, and just had the news that my best friend (apart from you lot) is coming over from France for our silver wedding ceilidh in August. Yay! And then, I won an hour's Thai Yoga massage in a prize draw at work so it's been a good day so far
Just need my solicitor to phone to say my car insurance claim has been settled and it will be perfect. Also, DH is on nights tonight so bed to myself

BOING!!

ma! you sound on good form!

at last! someone else with 'odd shaped ears'! my family have laughed at me for many years, even my office has not been safe (i have to listen t a lot of broadcast transcripts) i hate those 'stick 'em in your ear' headphones, i have tiny earholes (shame me bum dont match!) and have to kind of wedge them in upside down - causes great hilarity! i think they need to get a sense of humour!

ESP - my df had heart surgery last week after suffering 3 attacks in quick sucession - very frightening for both him and us - i cannot tell you how good he looks this week, good colour, less stressed, calmer - we thought just 8 days ago we were going to lose him, be brave! the best can happen!

Jesus glad to hear your Dad is doing well. A few years ago my parents were both unwell at the same time - one with a kidney infection and the other with a broken ankle. For a while my days were a constant round of taking one or other to a hospital appointment, collecting shopping for them, helping with decision making. I remember well the feeling of thinking "oh dear, this is what my life is going be like from now on". There is a great temptation to imagine that with older people, it is always going to be a downwards trajectory. But like your dad, mine made a great recovery - looking better than he had for ages, and that whole experience gave me a lot more confidence and optimism in facing other issues related to their age and health - to see that an older person can make a full recovery is very life affirming.

wow - have a missed call on my phone from solicitor saying third party have made an offer and to call back after 2.30. How spooky is that?
we are not talking millons before anyone gets too excited but enough for the mocktails to be on me tonight hopefully!!!

I'll have a virgin mojito - lots of ice, lots of fresh mint, drop of angostura bitters, squeeze of fresh lime and some ginger beer

jesus good news about your dad

ma got my fingers crossed for you and mines a virgin Mary with loads of ice and worcester sauce please

fingers crossed ma I'm still trying to find a non-fizzy soft drink that I can order in a pub (at home I'd normally drink water or herbal tea) Can anyone recommend something?

I don't particularly like anything too citrusy. J20 did a lovely one called Apple and Melon - really refreshing - but they stopped making it

Hi Ma. Well, I have found that eating earlier and drinking later means I drink less. One thing I notice is that I am putting more bottles out for recycling or sneaking them into the public bins and hoping no one sees and that is a sign I need to cut down.

I would like to be able to read an article in a paper about dangerous drinking without feeling guilty and worried :(

ok Babes the (non-alcoholic) drinks are on me!
have accepted the offer. Not a King's ransom but enough to get new windows in the back of the house, decorate our bedroom, pay a few bills and have a wee bitty left over just for me!!!!
Got a big stupid grin on my face - hope the cheque arrives before we go on holiday in two weeks....

Hello girls, sorry not had time to catch up with everything, dog has taken over my life, I haven't feel so knackered since DD was born! Have already met a nice guy out dog walking though :) Mia I'm another one of the earphone in one ear gang so I can lie on my side in bed and it's comfortable. I listen to wonderful ambient stuff and even have an hour-long track of rain with low rumbling thunder in the background! I can't seem to go to sleep without it.

Off the diazepam now, no withdrawals and just been to my weekly recovery group. We have such intimate, amusing conversations and so much in common. I need to watch out - I was at a friend's at the weekend and she poured me a huge glass of sauvignon blanc and without the antabuse I have little doubt I would have drunk it. I've a long way to go it seems. But apart from that am feeling healthy and guilt-free and have some peace of mind.

Hope you're all OK, old-timers, newbies and in-betweeners xx

ps the only trouble with Alfie seems to be that he farts for England! Even worse then ex-H and that's saying something :)

Thank you Venus - more exceptionally wise words! I had a gentle day with DD and felt much better by lunchtime and the anxiety passed.

JWN you are not alone; I'm not comfortable for long with the 'plug in' headphones because my holes are the wrong shape, and the big earmuff jobbies are no good either because I have rather large ears and they don't fit in the padded circle. at least they don't stick out as well... I'm so glad your dad is on the mend. How is your mum now?

Joey I've realised over the years that I'm much more prone to depression during the winter, and always have to increase my AD dose then. So in the spring when I feel better I drop it down so that I've got some room to maneouvre in the winter, iyswim. The GP is ok with me doing that. This year wasn't so good though and it wasn't really a good idea to halve it from 40mg to 20mg when I'd only just started feeling better - hence I bumped it back up to 30mg. I've been feeling fine for several weeks now though, so I felt it was safe to drop it down to my usual summer 20mg od. I hope that's the case! I think I was just getting a bit anxious because I've been feeling better these past few weeks than I have done in a really long time, and things have been going so well that I just had a little sliver of panic that 'things are too good; something's got to go wrong!'.

Great news Ma! I'll have a mineral water please [ultra-virtuous emoticon]

Soma what are you feeding him? I've fairly strong opinions on all the pointless shit they put in dog food - the vast majority of canned dog food is min 6% meat. 6%! WTF is the other 94%? Cheap filler, that's what. Most of it passes straight through so you get bulky stinking poo and dreadful flatulence. I use Nature Diet or Nature's Harvest wet food (min 60% meat) with James Wellbeloved dried food as a mixer. It's not cheap, but with a small dog that's not a problem. A packet of wet food is around a quid and does three meals for Bella, a bag of dried lasts a month or so. I don't buy chicken or duck dog food for ethical reasons so it's just fish or lamb and rice, but she's fine with that. They're wheat free too (Bella's wheat intolerant). She very rarely farts at all, thank god, as she's always on our lap/in our bed! Also much more of the food is absorbed so smaller volumes of poo.

On that delightful note, I'm off to eat dinner.

Soma brilliant news about the diazepam and the support group, btw!

Blimey, I thought this was non drinking thread, not a Dog's dinner! Definately TMI.

Sorry! I should have PMed that, shouldn't I...

We also feed James Wellbeloved, dog has an allergy to something and this was recommended. No idea if it helps, but its not that expensive and is full of proper doggy food.

My DH feeds him a sausage or bacon on Saturdays, and he farts for the rest of the weekend.

soma did I urge you to get a dog? I'm so sorry, that was a mistake. Farts are the least you have to worry about.

Today my dog rolled in fox shit. It went everywhere on my clothes, my hands, my car!

Dogs will also cost you more money than you could EVER spend on alcohol, embarrass you by peeing up a small child's bike, worry you to bits in the middle of the night... and love you forever.

No doubt you have already been taken in by his cheeky eyes and snuggly warm body, but I thought I should warn you.

Ah yes... the fox shit! Bella rolls in this at EVERY opportunity. The hills are alive with the sound of me bellowing NOOOO! NO NO NO NO YOU FILTHY BITCH!!! as she rolls with gay abandon in every stinking pile she encounters. At least some of it washes off in the dank, fetid, muddy bogs she likes to cool off in. And this is a dog that doesn't like going out in the rain, shakes piteously when you give her a bath, and has to be cuddled in a bath towel for an hour afterwards!

That's why you need one of THESE

Mia you can buy a pillow with a built-in speaker (just a little one ) which will plug into an ipod and means only the person with their head on the pillow can hear it. Can't remember where but I've seen them advertised.

Got to dash, will catch up later x

Saf if you're reading, Happy Hump Day!