The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Starting the Summer Filled With Luscious Mocktails.

[Mouseface]

Hello, I'm Mouse and I used to drink far too much. Too much vodka to be exact, then too much wine, then too much cider....... you can imagine how it went.

This Bus is full of people like me, and people like you actually. Sober people, drinkers, a few not surers, and those who are simply 'somewhere'.

The one thing that we have in common is that we can/do/did/will abuse alcohol.

Some for a number of years, some months, some for their entire adult (and before) lives.

The support here is for everyone. Those in AA, those who are taking medication to help, those going it alone, those with the support of others. We're all here for the same reason.

Why not come and say hello? We are all so very different in our every day lives but we all have a common theme.....

And, for those who want to see where all of this began 2 years ago, HERE IS a link to all of the past Bus rides.

Morning all, have been lurking and reading, am full of admiration for the strength you are all showing.

Yesterday my BIL had a heart attack and I dealt with my emotions by... getting completely pissed. I feel disgusting today, emotionally and physically.

I am vowing to myself I will not drink for, at least, this week. I have to change. I just have to.

Welcome new babes, I'm a nearly-new babe and my life is already beginning to turn around. Stick with us, it works :) Mia and Venus haven't really managed to catch up with what's been going on with this "other" thread? Is there trouble brewing? Hope not.

Limit I'd say give the prozac 4 weeks and if no better, go back to GP. They'll either tell you to stick with it for another 2 or so or switch you to another SSRI. I was very fortunate with mine (sertraline) because it worked quite quickly and carried on working. Glad it's helping with the drinking though.

Mouse thanks so much for doggie advice, dog and cat actually sat in the same room last night and were both relaxed. Onwards and upwards! Boy do dogs get you fit - three walks yesterday and an hour already today. Can I keep it up? Alfie is so pleased to be with Seth on the bus, the lovely big and little dogs that keep us laydeez company. BTW, chatting to a man online who says he's looking for someone who "wants to be treated like a lady" - to me that sounds like patronising sexist twaddle, does anyone agree? Should I tick him off my list? - not that I've got one :( Walking Alfie this morning, I just couldn't have imagined doing it with any sort of hangover and I'm finished with the diazepam too now and no problems doing that so very pleased. So now it's just my 100mg antabuse at bed-time (following the wonderful Hopefully's advice) and 50mg sertraline in the morning. And lots of coffee! I feel knackered but in a healthy sort of way if that makes sense.

I am now an alcohol-free dog person. Six months ago I couldn't have imagined that in a million years :) Have a good day all you lovely women, I couldn't have done it without you xxx
.

soma you sound wonderful this morning! Does Alfie really love you for rescuing him? Has he settled quite well?

I personally think 'treated like a lady' sounds sexist, but it might be just he kinda meant well. Depends on his age/generation/other personality traits. Don't necessarily write him off if he's good-looking, rich and has all his own teeth. And likes pets.

Thank you for your welcomes. I feel a massive sense of relief, not only that I have plucked up the courage to post on here and get the support from you lovely ladies, but that I have hopefully taken alcohol out of the equation altogether.
I started to realise that I spent so much emotional energy and time obsessing about it. Ive known deep down for months that giving up the alcohol was the best thing for me but kept rationalising it to myself. I think I still am, but from a new perspective.
I had been managing successfully to not drink from Monday to Friday, but Friday 7 pm would hit and to the fridge I would go. Wake up feeling shit and unmotivated and then not get anything done I had planned to,incuding being present for my dd who is 3. Yet another wasted weekend where I barely do anything because I'm too scared to go out in case someone realises how hungover I am.
Its going to be hard to break ingrained habits, but I'm going to do it.

aggis it is hard to break habits, but the babes on the bus are so helpful and supportive. Could you change your routine on a Friday? Go out somewhere and get past the initial 7pm thing? Also make a plan of alternatives to do/eat/drink. And of course, come on here.

Hi aliasjoey yes that is what I need to do. This Friday won't be too much of an issue as I am going to see my mum so will have a long drive. I will have the inevitable question of what I want to drink about 5 minutes after I arrive. I think the next weekend will be the same as probably going up there again.
Can I ask how some of you ladies have broached the subject with your wider family? I have mentioned to my mum in the past that I felt I had a problem with alcohol, but she saw or imagined that I had it under control, as I kept playing it down. Did you tell anyone, or did you just keep making excuses not to drink?

I've told some that I'm cutting down or not drinking at the moment.

A technique often used by some babes is claiming to be on antibiotics. Actually people sometimes don't even notice. We've spent so long with our lives revolving around alcohol that we don't realise that not everyone does! A simple 'I'd love a cup of tea - I'm gasping!' is actually normal for a lot of people. You don't even have to give an explanation, just 'no, thanks - not at the moment' implies that you might later - and by then no-one will remember anyway.

BOING!!

afternoon all! df doing loads better, now got trouble with dm, she fell and broke a couple of ribs, not good at 73! they look like a pair of poor old crocks right now very scary to have both of them out of action!

anyway, hello new babes! nice to meet you! Aggis, i told my family the truth (tbh they all guessed anyway) i figured that they love me and want me to be well and healthy and happy, i guessed right! they have all been very supportive, for me, being kind of 'out and proud' is the only way i can do it! i hid the drinking, im not about to hide the soberity!

electric hope your bil is ok now. are you feeling any better today?
Day 1 here for me yet again!!

Hi guys.

I have a problem with alcohol (well, the problem is me).

Today I will not drink.

I collected the DCs from school all smiley and when a couple of the mums (who saw me acting atrociously last week at a school function), asked how I... was (you might know how that goes - 'how are you' with a sort of inflection which means 'you acted like a twat'), I just smiled and chatted.

Same with DD's teacher (who I SWORE AT).

Couldn't face taking the DCs on to swimming lesson but I want that to be the last time I cry off something because I am ashamed of how I acted when drunk.

Hope it's ok to take a nervous seat at the back.

Welcome Kiridek :)

Mouse is driving atm, I think. I got on the bus two months ago, and had my last drink on 27 April. I'm a total abstainer, for a variety of reasons (lack of willpower once I've had a drink being the main one).

Others like Faire are controlled drinkers.

We've all tried lots of different strategies to manage drink though - the key is finding the right strategy for you.

Enjoy the ride - it's been wonderful for me and I hope it will be for you :)

welcome kiri we've all done stupid things when drunk, its good you have made the first step!

No advice, but somebody wiser than me will be along in a minute.

joey

Hi kiri and lovely to see you over here . I've been on here for nearly 2 years - and I don't think I ever imagined that I'd be so happy. I've had a couple of brief returns to drinking, but they have only served to demonstrate that I have never wanted to be a moderate drinker, and that even after a really long abstinence I could all too quickly revert to my previous (bad) behaviour . Others on here are much more successful at managing to drink moderately, but we all have lots in common.

I have so much more space in my head, now that I'm not continually planning when / where my next drink would be, or worrying about how I got bruised, or who I'd insulted.

hallo where is everyone...

I am still practising my early nights... so boring, yawn.

It will still be 11.30 before I switch off the light, probably after midnight before I sleep but at least I can't blame the alcohol...

soma you okay? xxx to alfie

Welcome kiri

Morning joey Im here, up with the birds as always but struggling to get up most mornings. Having a lot of trouble actually getting to sleep but once Im off I don't wake up which is lovely.

mia meant to say yesterday that I was impressed how you and water responded on that thread, I read the whole thread with interest and with new eyes, I can imagine I would have been one of those trying to defend the consensus of drinking being ok not so long ago.

Made me also think, my GOD I used to view my glass (or three or four or five) of wine as a treat at the end of each working day. Its been hard to shift that mindset, I feel like I don't have a "treat" to look forward to anymore, except perhaps a better nights sleep and no alcoholic fug in the mornings.

Hoping community team will be in touch with me soon. still nothing. Will have to contact them again I think.

Forgot to mention for those who asked; I have been on my meds now for over a week but not quite two yet (will be two weeks this Friday)

Definitely not as spaced out as I was last week on them but I am definitely more tired.

Morning. After my rather smug posts of late I can feel myself slipping back into it. I feel overwhelmed with life and wine is becoming a way of checking out for a bit.

A friend gave birth to her daughter yesterday. It upset me much more than I expected. I thought shed had boy and when I found out it was a girl it really hit me. I hate feeling like this. Now I'm just bracing myself for the name. I'm dreading it being the one I picked.

((MsGee)) XX I don't know the back story but it sounds like you are hurting and I just wanted to reach out and give you a virtual hug X

I found out that one of my very friends was expecting earlier this week. I was ttc with my H for the last year but due to my alcohol addiction and various other reasons we didn't manage, then we had relationship problems we are still trying to work through so decided to stop ttc. For me I probably will not have another child, Im 42 this year and don't want to put myself through IVF or anything else to conceive if it didn't happen naturally. Now we have other mountains to climb.

So its kind of depressed me finding out she is having another

Morning everyone, I'm still here! Taken the day of again as dd still coughing and vomited this morning. Have to try and get an appointment at the doctor.
Feeling better today, yesterday I think I was still working through the excesses of Saturday night. I'm thinking a lot about the decision I made on Sunday and I alternate between moments of happiness, and at others slight panic!
I will do it though. It's stupid because not too long ago I did do 2 weeks without too much difficulty, but I think it's because I have a yawning stretch of one year ahead of me. I will succeed.
It's been great to read some of your experiences, and I really identify with the thoughts and feelings.
Have a good day everyone.

MsGee - I'm sorry you're so low :( I have one child and wanted another but, for various reasons, it didn't happen. When my SIL got pregnant with her 2nd (and was incredibly smug) it was like a slap in the face. The only thing that made it better was that she went on and on about wanting the baby to be a girl and it turned out to be a boy - I suppose it was mean of me to be secretly pleased that she didn't get a girl, but she was incredibly irritating at the time.

I'm a bit worried I'm slipping into my old ways. I've been drinking more than I was when I cut down. I'm also concerned about how much it is costing me financially :(

Limit thank you ((( ))) to you too. Its hard isn't it? I try to be happy and I know that someone else having babies doesn't affect my situation but I can't help stamping my feet toddler-like and thinking "it should have fucking well been me".

Aggis hang in there - I find the longer you go, the easier it gets (apart from the odd blip as I am experiencing ) In terms of your previous post about telling family, my husband knows the real reason, other family just know that I am not drinking as part of a 'get healthy' drive. I think I initially told them that I tested it to see if it helped my eczema and it did, so I didn't want to start again.

Thanks Limit, I really did feel that people were deliberately missing the point! It's still early days for you with the ADs - stick with it and you should start to feel better over the next week.

Hello new babes. electric I hope your BIL is on the mend.

MsGee sorry to hear that you're feeling wobbly. Draw on the wonderful support here on the bus and let time heal you. That sounds absurdly trite - you know what I mean I hope xx

I'm feeling a bit nervous today, I've got my official interview on Thursday to become a community first responder and if I pass I'll be doing the training in August. I'm panicking that the fact I've got points on my driving licence is going to jeopardise me being accepted. My tesm leader seems to think it'll be ok but I'm getting a bit antsy about it. It's all happened much faster than I dared hope, since when I first applied I was told that the team is full and they don't need anyone. I feel like things have been going so well lately and I've been feeling so good, that something's bound to go wrong! I've reduced my ADs another 10mg to 20mg a day too so maybe that's giving me a bit of a wobble.

aggis I told everyone about trying not to drink, but then I am a blurter who is incapable of keeping anything quiet at all! It was amazing how many friends (whom it would never occur to me drank too much) said 'oh I really need to do that too - I drink every night/ drink too much'.

joey do you have an ipod? Mine is my failsafe (almost) get to sleep method. I use language tapes on there and that gives just the right balance of having to concentrate (therefore not thinking about sleeping) and it being monotonous enough to fall asleep. Also if you can't sleep than instead of wasted time lying there (which makes me resentful and less sleepy!) you're improving your mind into the bargain.

greyhound can you get back on track, do you think? I managed Day 1 yesterday for the first time in AGES. Cobra alcohol free beer was my "soft" drink of choice and I didn't even miss the wine. Would that work for you?