The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Starting the Summer Filled With Luscious Mocktails.

[Mouseface]

Hello, I'm Mouse and I used to drink far too much. Too much vodka to be exact, then too much wine, then too much cider....... you can imagine how it went.

This Bus is full of people like me, and people like you actually. Sober people, drinkers, a few not surers, and those who are simply 'somewhere'.

The one thing that we have in common is that we can/do/did/will abuse alcohol.

Some for a number of years, some months, some for their entire adult (and before) lives.

The support here is for everyone. Those in AA, those who are taking medication to help, those going it alone, those with the support of others. We're all here for the same reason.

Why not come and say hello? We are all so very different in our every day lives but we all have a common theme.....

And, for those who want to see where all of this began 2 years ago, HERE IS a link to all of the past Bus rides.

obrigada It takes ages to get out of the tunnel, I expected to start feeling better almost instantly - am still not sure if I am feeling more positive or just wishful thinking

at one point, the light at the end was in fact just a train coming the other way.

I already have a hat ma and its waterproof

Can I stealth boast? DD2 has had some photos taken to promote herself as a singer - I don't normally put the DCs on my profile but will put two up briefly. which one do you like best?

I can only see photos of a yummy looking house. ?

won't let me into my profile page

ok - done it now

Afternoon, tis me, Mouse

JWN - I'm so very, very sorry to hear about your dear father, you must have been utterly terrified. I hope that he makes 100% recovery and that you are as okay as you can be. Massive hugs xxxx

Joey - thank you lovely but being on this thread keeps me sane and in contact with the outside world

I'm so pleased for you! The feeling better thing is different for each Babe but once it hits, it's amazing and feels so good. You're doing the every day stuff without a crutch, a glass of something to numb the pain and you're getting through it. Well done on 10 days xx

qo - thank you for sharing your experience with me re statementing. I've spoken to Nemo's Community Children's Nurse about it and she's not a happy woman to say the least! It will all be sorted in the end.

Obrigada - how are things with you?

Soma - fantastic that you've got a tapering schedule in place. I understand what you mean about having a crutch in place. I used vodka in the past to emphasise the effect my meds had on me, I used to love that free falling sensation I'd get as they kicked in....... I used to blur the edges, lesson the blow of reality, block out my emotions so that I couldn't feel anything, damage limitation.......

It's different for me now.... I want to feel now, I want to see now, and I want to be the best mother, wife, friend, carer, etc that I can be but most of all, I want to be me and I can't do that if I'm hiding behind medication, drugs or alcohol can I?

I dare say that you were that person too. You're not any more, or at least you're moving away from her, that woman that you used to see in the mirror, the one you didn't like that much, the one that DD saw too........

It's time to move forward and start enjoying life, see the sharp edges, feel the emotions you've buried deep down inside you. Not all at once, just bit by bit. We could do it together if you wanted?

I have lots of unopened boxes that I need to open. Or destroy..... one way or another, they need to go.

Thurso - are you around? Hope you're okay. xx

I managed to have a decent sleep last night as DH did the night shift for me, Nemo slept in 'til' 6.20am and then when back to sleep with DH until 8.30. I feel a bit better and so far no vomiting (crosses fingers) but my pain is bad.

I need to see the doc anyway but I'm going to ask about a referral back to physio or OT to get help with getting out of bed...... I still need help to turn over and get out of bed which is no use when I've got to get to Nemo.

Right, enough moaning from me. Stay safe Babes, be back later xxxx

Ma - oh she is gorgeous, I like the second one..... xx

There's a lovely fizzy vibe on the thread at the moment apart of course from the news of your dear dad JWN who I hope will make a full recovery. Ma your DD is stunning but I'm sure she takes after you :)

Mouse glad you're feeling better. And don't ever apologise for moaning, you never moan! You understand where I want to be so well and if you're willing to hold my hand and help me learn from your wisdom and experience I'd be truly touched. Joey well done on 10 days! How are the cravings? The dog (Alfie) is 5, so approx 36 in human years. The main problem I foresee at the moment is that he loves to cock his leg to mark his territory (he peed up against the piano leg when he visited) so I'm hoping to find some sort of cleaning spray that'll leave a smell to stop him doing it again. Did I mention the rescue are giving him a bath in the morning before we come and get him?

Mia how lovely that you met your gorgeous DP on Soulmates. I've done internet dating and got engaged to two blokes (not at the same time) and was most fortunate to realise what eejits they both were before things progressed too far. Always been my problem, falling in too deep too soon. But not anymore. This time I want to take it slow, get to know someone as a friend and not project into the future. I just hope I'm not considered too much over the hill and it's very kind of you to use all those nice adjectives about me! They most certainly apply to you too! Well done on the weight loss and the controlled drinking. I have a niggling worry beginning to form in my brain that I might be hoping to control my drinking in the future but I just saw my key worker and she told me I should simply stay on the antabuse for 6 months and then see if I can not drink without it for at least two months. And not think beyond that.

My cat has just jumped up on the table and is gazing at me adoringly - I sense she suspects there'll be a new arrival on Saturday and wants to be sure I'm still going to love her as much. Which of course I will....Stay safe lovely babes and have a good evening xx

Ma your DD is gorgeous and I like the second pic best.....

And yes, another vote for the second picture Ma, you can see her face better.

thanks all - I like the second one too, so it's good that non-biased people agree with me.
She might be pretty but she's a pain in the arse most of the time

dad doing well! MA!! beautiful!!!!! dd! (and i know just what you mean! beauty with an edge! mines just the bloody same!)

lovely photos Ma 2nd one gets my vote too.

ma your daughter is beautiful! TBH I like both photos, they show different aspects.

soba I don't really have any cravings, its more a sort of in-my-head 'what am I missing out on?' feeling. Like sometimes I think what does it all matter? If I were run over by a bus tomorrow wouldn't I regret not having a drink the night before?

Except... I probably would regret it, I'd have more than I should, not get enough sleep and end up tripping over in front of the bus...

Great answer Joey - me thinks you're getting it....

I've got a cute DD too but she's obsessed with her virtually non-existent blackheads - I told her when I was at school we just used to squeeze them out between our fingers. Happy days!

Hello my friends,

I have only read the last page, so forgive me for being rude!
Mouse Love you lots li'll sis for thinking about me!

Finally! I have completed (and passed!) my second year, on to the Diploma next, and then I will be a fully paid up member of some club!!

Work has been mad, but, the worst thing of my last week has been waving bye-bye to DC2, who is working in America for the next three months.Dc1 is going to Australia for a holiday in July, and although he lives and works in London, I feel like nothing on earth!!

This will be the first summer since before I had the children that DH and I will be on our own, such a steep learning curve!

I have had many quite a few evenings this week of feeling like I don't want to think about stuff anymore, but knowing that I have work to do has saved me really. Dh is dealing with it in his own way ie: out all the time playing sport. All part of life's rich tapestry, as my Dad would say, I guess.

BproudCongratulations to your daughter, DC1 did the same last year, and is now earning nearly as much as his Dad!!

Ma How are you, my matey? Your DD is beautiful, your genes .

Silver How did work go? sending love xxx

JWN when is your DD's wedding, and what are you wearing? I would like a full rundown!!

Sorry not to name check everyone, but have been at "Chessington, World of Adventure"!!! all day on a school trip, so I am completely shattered, but so wanted to get in touch again.

Much love
T xxxxx

Thurso!!
You are just in time, we are all off to indie's wedding tomorrow.
I'm lower thana bugs ass but still here.
don't envy you your summer though

Ma I have pm'd Inde, didn't want to put loads of gush on the thread

I'm still here too, but not so great tonight, Summer Lovin' (circa "Grease 1980's) doesn't feel like it will be fine!!!!
xxx

I'm all ready for isindie's wedding, and I've got my HAT Hoping you have a wonderful day ISINDIE, and that you are very present with every important moment and feeling. This is one day when you should be truly intoxicated by life and love (and have no need of any other intoxicant).

message to everyone - Ma's dd does indeed take her good looks from her Mum

thurso I know just how you feel and I've pm'd you with something that was 'interesting' for us

joey would you regret not having had a drink the night before? Well you would if they delayed your treatment while they worked out whether your confusion was due to intoxication or a head injury; and you would if they couldn't give you the 'best' treatment because your high blood pressure was a contra-indication; and you would if you were laying there worrying whether your nearest and dearest would find your hidden stash of vodka / empties while they were looking through your belongings. And yes they are all nightmare thoughts that I have had.

Isindie [emoticon with eyes gushing with tears] xxx

Have a beautiful wedding day tomorrow Isinde - good on you for being clear with family, it's YOUR day.

Something funny's happening to me, my libido's coming back. Maybe it's down to sobriety, who knows, but I like it! Just gotta find me a clever, attractive, slightly unconventional all round good chap then! Eeezy peezy! (not)