The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Are Going To Need A Bigger Bus!

[Mouseface]

Which is FANTASTIC!

Welcome to the Brave Babes Battle Bus, I'm Mouse and I'm addicted to cheese, but have a pretty nasty relationship with alcohol too, mainly vodka.

This Bus is for anyone and everyone. Drinking or sober, or somewhere in between or just not sure if you're drinking too much........... this is the place to ask and maybe have a chat too.

No pressure, no judging, no cliquey savoury flans (although I'm rather partial to a cheese slice ), we're all on The Bus for the same reason; alcohol.

Even if it's not you, and you'd like to talk about someone you know, come and say hi. We won't bite, well, not unless you ask very nicely!

And, if you'd like to see our journey so far, follow THIS LINK and read back through the previous links there.

See you soon xx

Tristessa What vit B do you take? are there different brands/strengths? Which should I take?

That's an interesting resource cgno. One statistic I hadn't previously been aware of is this:-

"Long term misuse of alcohol can cause a wide range of mental health effects. Alcohol misuse is not only toxic to the body but also to brain function and thus psychological well being can be adversely affected by the long-term effects of alcohol misuse. Psychiatric disorders are common in alcoholics, especially anxiety and depression disorders, with as many as 25% of alcoholics presenting with severe psychiatric disturbances."

There must be some degree of chicken-and-egg in this, because depression can lead to self-medication with alcohol, rather than alcohol leading to depression.

Mia what blog is this? Have I missed something, have I, have I??!!

Morning, tis me, Mouse

HR - Alcohol is a seriously nasty piece of work, especially for women. It causes far more health issues for us Babes than is does for men. (ooops, forgot MIFLAW is a Babe )

The list, if you choose to look, is endless. As HR says it's not just the physical health problems, it's the mental ones too. Another reason why you should not drink on ADs. You're counteracting them.

I think we all need to value ourselves a little bit more. After all, if we aren't kind to ourselves, who will be? Only we know how we really feel. Inside and out. Maybe, for today, just today, we should do something nice for ourselves?

cgno - I've taken high levels of EPO for years, I can't say that I noticed a difference in cravings but it's been in my system since my late teens (feckin years then ) so maybe one of the other Babes not on it already, could be our guinea pig?

Soma - how are you feeling today? Did you sleep? Plans on calling the GP?

I'm off into town shortly. We are going to try some puree for Nemo as he's happy with almost smooth liquids (ice-cream, soup, melted chocolate, puddings etc...) so we need to get him something else. I'm facing a huge dilemma with his feeding, long story and I'll post for advice later if that's okay?

Have great days everyone,

Mouse

Soma best of luck with the greyhound project! They do make wonderful pets.

I am still drinking less than I used to but still drinking more than I should.

Bit of both Hopefully. Alcohol is a depressant. 2 glasses=relax, 2 bottles=depress. Sometimes it scares the bejesus when I hear of the prescribed ADs and alcohol combo. GP's very rarely ask if a patient presenting with depression is drinking too much, because they know generally speaking the truth won't be told. AD's are dished out like smarties.

Alcohol citation the Lancet is more dangerous than Heroin or Crack. It's available, legal and everywhere.

Alcohol is dangerous to every organ in the body, including the brain. There is a school of thought that we alcoholics are already chemically imbalanced. Old research, poo pooed by some scientists, is now being re visited, it makes so much sense. If anyone is interested Google T.H.I.Q. Rats were given alcohol and water, all ignored the alcohol. Then T.H.I.Q. was implanted in their brains, all ignored the water and drank the alcohol until they died. It is a very interesting theory.

GP's get about seven hours training on alcoholism, they find us time consuming, costly, and with miserable success rates, dents their egos to be a failure. There are some who are progressive, and one day I hope all will follow their lead.

Hope all on the bus and it's subsidiaries have a decent day.

Morning all. CGNO that made an interesting read, the anxiety/depression link with alcohol is undeniable. I've been on and off SSRIs for years and actually believe (make that KNOW) they increase my cravings for alcohol and I get more of a buzz when I'm drinking when I'm on them. So I've decided today to slowly cut down, I've done it before with no problems. Can I be boring and ask again for a recommended list of vitamins to take? I take a multi-vit with all the B ones but should I try milk thistle and evening primrose too?

Truth how many cigs do you smoke a day? I agree you shouldn't cut them out quite yet but why not go and see the nurse practitioner at your local surgery and ask her advice? I work in a practice and the nurses are absolutely wonderful and more empathetic than a lot of GPs! Sarah that's shocking that GPs get so little training on alcoholism. I'd say that at least 25% of our patients have "alcohol dependence syndrome" in their list of active problems so it should be a far higher priority. I'm not a clinician BTW, just an administrator but I love the job.

You know my GP referred me to the Community Drug & Alcohol Team? Well apparently as part of a nationwide initiative all the D&A services come under the new umbrella of the CRI - which stands for - wait for it....Crime Reduction Initiative! What idiot thought that one up? Talk about making us feel even more shit about ourselves than we already do!

Tristessa a month sober, that is fantastic. Mouse I slept well thank you and am awaiting a call for an appointment. Hope you find Nemo something nice to eat! I am beginning to think after what everyone said last night that I may be relying too much on the antabuse so am going to try very hard today to not drink. Perhaps you can all help me. Chasing, Mia is the Foraging Photographer, go google! Her pictures are as beautiful as she is :)

Good morning babes!

Gosh I was a bit of a drama queen yesterday, wasn't I?! I'm having a panic attack at the idea of a lifetime of sobriety! God, somebody slap me.

Enough of the melodramatics. I won't be drinking till at least Friday. Simple.

soma sorry to hear what you're going through, it sounds as though you are relying on that drug. I hope you manage to come through okay.

sorry for the double post - not enough coffee.

Another one here on ADs (for anxiety thought, not depression)

hi babes.

add to list mental health problems: depression, delusions, alcohol induced psychosis, suicidal ideation etc. then there's poor judgement and all the health risks that come with that including stds, drink driving (risk of injury to self or others, losing license, criminal record etc). then if you include the effect on others the list gets really horrible - the knock on effects of being raised by someone who puts alcohol ahead of you and your well being are well attested to

anyway firstly isinde no i wouldn't leave the thread because of something you said (and i wouldn't consider you an internet random either!) - it wasn't really about what you said - iirc i lost my post then did a quick potted version and maybe the potted version didn't say enough to make things clear.

i read what people are writing and i just heard so much alcoholic thinking and it felt like if i were to point it out i'd be seen as rude or mean or a zealot or something because i don't drink now. so i was feeling mismatched to the thread itms because i could either bite my lip and feel... dishonest really or i could stick my neck out and be seen as a bitch.

think the key is that i needed to take a step back and remember my sobriety is the most important thing for me and to not let my head get done in by anything. everyone is on their own journey and makes their own choices.

waffling.

5 weeks sober today and very happy to be. it sounds ridiculous but i can't tell you how changed me, and my life, and my son's life are already. i honestly didn't think my drinking was effecting ds but who and how i am now is sooooo much better for him.

it's also good to be thinking straight or where it isn't straight knowing that and reassessing. had some family weirdness yesterday and was able to see it very differently and run it by someone and check my instincts and then trust myself - hard to explain but i feel more trustworthy sober - i'm learning to trust my instincts and my feelings again in a way i couldn't before because it was all skewered.

i must admit i find it hard to read about people's drinking choices effecting their children, i always did. children are my sticking point - i can empathise with anything and everything and be understanding until there are children involved and then i'm afraid something switches in my head - presumably it's to do with having been unhappy and a victim to other people's bad choices myself as a child so my empathy auto tunes to the child in the picture rather than the adult. so again i need to do the step back i think

right that's my long waffle. have had 48hrs of intensive learning and befuddlement to try and sort out laptop - in the end i've managed to archive the old system and install a new operating system and i'm in the process of extracting photos etc from the archived system. one very steep learning curve!!! in future i WILL back up my data dammit!

love to all and sorry for epic post and any upset i have caused. my head, my problem!

I have namechanged for this post because its very personal and

One of the reasons I have struggled to give up the booze is I have no sex drive. I rarely want sex unless I have had a drink (and even then, what twice in the last 6 months?) and am more relaxed.

BTW this is not post-baby body or anything - I have never had much libido, even before kids. And actually, its not something I miss or crave - but feel I owe it to DH to make the effort.

Mentioned to GP who tried to refer me to Relate, but I had a VERY bad experience with someone there, and never want to go back. I might pay for private counselling if I thought it would do any good, but I'd be so embarrassed & not convinced it would work. Particularly since I don't actually care anyway.

The booze is a red herring. Haven't had sex for months.

If you figure out who I am, PLEASE don't out me...

All I can say is please do try to find a good therapist - not someone who is a generalist in relationships (if that is not your problem) but someone who specialises in sex therapy and women's issues. There are all kind of reasons why libido may be low - hormonal, emotional, your childhood beliefs, your experiences, and it really does deserve some gentle and careful exploration, not least so that YOU can make peace with your own self - whatever the outcome for your libido.

You already know that booze is not a good therapist

And I didn't mean to suggest that low libido is in any way wrong, sometimes it is just what it is.

SAF thanks for the long thoughtful post and one techie question. I've never understood how to back up data? Do you have to put it on a disk or something - trouble is my lappie has no disk drive but I understand you can buy an add-on. And well done for fixing the problem, you geeky genius!

Bambi I hear this from my married friends so often - none of them seem to want to have sex with their DHs and just go through the motions to keep them happy. One of them actually hates having sex so much she'd be grateful if DH got a mistress and would stop bothering her! Not an ideal solution of course. How much of an issue is it for DH? My libido died about a year ago, I think it's the old "use it or lose it" conundrum but I haven't had sex for that long. I did love it before though but now I'm without, I hardly ever miss it. In fact it just seems plain daft. Strange...

Hi everyone

Isawbambi I completely understand where you're coming from - my DH said he'd noticed a definitely correlation between how much booze I had and how likely he was to get lucky! Good luck with finding a therapist - is there anything else that could be causing the low libido? For me it's my hormones being a mess :(

aliasjoey I don't think you were being a drama queen - I really recognise that panic about the word "never" - I get half way there myself sometimes!

tristessa well done for your months sober and swallowedafly well done for 5 weeks. I am crossing everything that I'll be able to post something similar one day. Day 4 here and all ok so far...

I am willing to be a guinea pig in the Evening Primrose Oil trial - having never tried it before. I'll be your dawg :)

Thanks for the advice. I don't know if its hormones since I've always been like this.

venus you're right about alcohol not being a good therapist!
Good point about making peace with yourself - not matter the outcome.

sadsoma I agree with your friend. I'd be thrilled if DH found someone else to shag!

Hiya Babes

I am officially working from home today. Unofficially I am sitting on my arse playing on t'internet...

Hello swallowedafly congratulations on 5 weeks and getting your laptop sorted. I'm very impressed - I tend to get someone else to do it.

Hi bambi no advice, but I hope you are able to get the help you need.

Hoping, day 4, that's fantastic. ROFL at Ma - you mean it don't you? :)

I know I'm not going to drink today, the craving isn't there and it would be by now (usually strikes at around 2pm). Also have appointment with nice peeps from addiction clinic on Friday for an assessment and should get antabuse too. That has motivated me no end.

DD has just got in from school all grumpy (she's 12) - I'm sure some of you know what I mean! Managed to smile sweetly and get on with what I was doing. So much easier to deal with when you're sober.

Don't talk to me about sex - I have no recollection of it. The only proof I have of ever having engaged in such pursuits is the fact I have two children.

Soma - you sound so chipper and I am so pleased :) You must have iron willpower to get through the 5-6pm hurdle. Great news about appointment on Friday. I just wanted to let you know that the peeps will probably make you have a cardio assessment before prescribing antabuse. This is just to check that your ticker is okay so that if you were prescribed Antabuse and you were to cave in and drink, you wouldn't end up dead or anything.

My sex life is like a desert. I think dh and I did it four times last year.

Hopefully thank you! How are you doing yourself, you sound upbeat! What with you and Grey talking about deserts, it makes me feel so much better about being single. As I said, I don't miss sex at all! Would like a nice cultured gentleman caller though, to take me to concerts and the like. And would be great if he was teetotal too!

Joey I don't think you were being a drama queen. I can't contemplate the thought of never drinking again either.

Soma I'm so glad you're feeling better today.

Truth I'm glad you like the blog! Give photography a go you might love it. My camera does all the work most of the time, I just point and shoot on >80% of shots. I'm not a remotely skilled photographer but I love taking pictures and looking for what I hope will be a lovely photo.

I'm not going to drink today but am sorely tempted. I'm determined to have at least two AFDs a week though. Had a shitty day that started well and descended into shouting at DD who was questioning and arguing with every single thing I asked her to do. I threatened to send her back to school because at least the teacher gets paid to deal with unwilling learners and children who have an answer for everything! I was feeling thoroughly fed up and doubting my ability to home educate - really considering putting her back in school. Then we were parked outside the school this afternoon waiting to pick DD's friend up, and we saw DD's teacher - the one whose class she'd be in. We had a chat and the poor woman looks absolutely exhausted and stressed out (the school has issues). When I told her I was having a dreadful day she said so was she and that she felt like she'd been shouting all day too and that the class had been so disruptive that they'd been 20 mins late for PE. I felt better for having been reminded that there are good days and bad days (and awful days) in school too.

I'm off to make comfort food now.