Welcome to the Turning Tavern II: Now in 3D

[Gay40]

Welcome!

Likea please read the prvious page! (snigger) She said on FB earlier today that WIQ asked her to help her get ready for her date, Sleep told her to bugger off

I'm sure she'll be back on here with a full report later.

i like it here already - you guys are so sweet. It's ok i'm quite thickskinned... and i know it's very easy to be judgemental when you're typing into a little box and not looking the person in the face, so i'm quite good at filtering out the crap and taking the nuggets of gold. x

Gruffalo I think you'll be fine then. You need to develop a thick skin on any public forum, I think.

do u think it worth starting a new thread on, and just copying and pasting my question over? Don't want to take over existing conversations on here... but really would appreciate some advice. x

Personally I wouldn't. I think most (not all I'm sure, but a good number) of MNetters who could advise you are already on or know about this thread, so will find you here. If you start (IME) a thread about this sort of topic, you'll probably find most replies will be along the lines of cheating is wrong, finish your realtionship first etc which is a fair enough comment but not any real help to you.

The tavern is open to all and any new conversations are welcome. Would get tedious if Likea and I were the only ones banging on all the time (no disrespect Likea)

Gay is a good source of advice, and usually pops up quite late at night. Most other regulars pop in at some point during the evening, so I'm sure you'll get some advice tonight, if not before.

eh? I did read prev.page polly but you only mentioned that she was on fb, nothing else - or was it in someone else's post? now I've read your latest, I'm sure she wasn't that rude to her wiq but declined with dignity !
So why where you saying few pages back that you aer worried yo may develop very strong feelings?
I can tell I literally felt like hit by a ton of bricks, it's amazing but also it sucks you in well and proper. I just love her to bits!
Do you think she COULD see me as a daughter she never had . I'm close to my mum so it's not in this vein from my point of view (not a replacement for a mother).

*were

*can tell you

• like I have been hit

Likea, my wiq said she saw me as a little sister yesterday I wasn't impressed and text her back telling her I didn't believe her she replied saying she loved me, I am gorgeous and she missed me etc. I told her very directly that I fancied her, and she said she feels the same about me and wishes she was a man.she said ours is the best relationship she has ever been in, because it's based on real emotions and not sex.

She said she had forgotten about her date and that she thought he would be boring. And then the cheeky moo asked me to help her get ready so I told her she could bugger off we are meeting tomorrow morning for shopping and lunch.

I don't care how much she tries to convince herself it's platonic she knows as much as I do that it's not, she even said herself "you are so much more than my friend" you don't say! She has also said "she wants to spoil me and be with me always" and that she will "never lie, cheat or leave" and "I love you and I miss you" - I'm pretty sure she doesn't talk to her other friends like that.

So shopping in the morning, Saturday night out and bbq Sunday. The weekend is shaping up well.

Polly - have you ever seen ashes to ashes? I can't help calling you bolls in my head gene hunt style.

Gruffalo, welcome! I am in a similar situation to you and you will probably get a bit of a kicking if you start your own thread it's so hard because anything you can get from another man you could potentially get from your husband, but this is totally different, and I just want to say I understand.

I don't care if wiq is male, female or stripy green and blue. I love her. I don't care if people tell me it's all been to fast etc I just love her and I can't help it.

Likea, you brighten my day with you rambling posts

sleep! at last you ve appeared! I feel exactly the same about my wiq, just love her to bits, sometimes it really feels overwhelming, especially as i can't express it to her or do as mich as like for her.
Haha didn't I say just that - that she woul,d be bored by the guy! here you ar, straight from hte horse's mouth even before the date! so is she going or not? I also understand her side, as I felt 'i wish she was a man' on the first meeting with my wiq, but as i said, give it ime, now I've accepted that the gender doesn't matter though it tool a few doubts to get there. Tbh I think you will know (and she) only when you 'go there' and try to be sexual, same applies to me, but I htink it's scary as it's unfamiliar and both sides willing you should be fine. Got reassured on this thread by ALL about this. Your wiq does seem a bit all oveer the place right now - 'sister', 'fancy', 'friend'!
sleep what do you think of my wiq - did you read my doubts about age gap? could she see me as daughter figure (same as your 'sister') you think, and that's where the fondness comes from?

did you actually say 'bugger off'?

I did. I texted her "bugger off you cheeky mare, I'm the last person you want helping you to get ready for a date, I want you all to myself" and she text back "I just wanted to spend some time with you, I really do love you" so we arranged shopping instead. She can't cancel the date as he has something she needs so has to see him anyway. She isnt overly enthusiastic about it anymore though.

There is a 14 year age gap with us, she said to me that she loves me, wants to look after and protect me, I said that it made me sound like one of her children and she said not at all, so I think genuine care and affection can seem as though it is parental even when it's not, I don't know about your wiq, but even just caring about you is a start. I've made a point of telling wiq that I didn't care about her age because I didn't want her to fall into the trap of deciding she was to old for me. It helps that I tend to just say what I am thinking and feeling and to hell with the consequences. But I am confident in her feelings towards me on a basic level, that she cares about me and wants me in her life so it's easier for me to just tell her the truth. Plus I can tell she fancies me, I am just waiting for her to realise it. She keeps saying that if she was 'that way' she would be all over me.

I am going to get her drunk and kiss her

Your situation sounds complicated, i don't know how I would deal with it to be honest I am like a bull in a china shop with these things but I am used to getting what I want so having to wait is hard for me

like - I'm not sure totally what gave the push to the 2 woman I know about. I know the Christian woman got into giving massages to her female friend. Maybe you could try and move things on this way? You know - Oh my back/neck is so stiff, what I could do with is a good massage.

Likea I'd be surprised of your WIQ see you as a daughter, nothing you've said about her behaviour has made me think that.

Yay I have a new nickname Quite happy to answer to Bolls, so long as it is said Gene Hunt stylee.

Yes I am worried I may develop strong feelings but I'm aware that's a possibility so I'll be working hard to rein myself in. Of course, it all depends whether I actually see her again.....

Zombie - that's what I did (massage) she enjoyed it

zombie not massage again!!!! Did you read about sleepless's session with her WIQ? And my WIQ is trained dontcha know, but I hate being massaged...

I'm starting to wonder if massage is the fail-safe way of bagging your WIQ.

No I didn't. I think massage can be a good way though of suggesting intimate physical contact that isn't automatically sexual. But I guess you need to do more than 1 massage and try and move it on a bit from there e.g. a gentle peck on the lips and see how she reacts while doing a massage?

Welcome Gruffalo. I'm a similar age to you, also married, with a kid and am trying to confront my feelings without hurting DH any more than necessary. I've told him all about how I feel and with his permission, tonight for the first time I'm going to a ladies' night at a gay pub in Watford. Give me a shout if you fancy coming along!

polly but your 'superior' comment could tie in with her feeling motherly towards me. Obviously I'm trying to steer it in a different direction, but I don't know whether i'll succeed.
Massge is out with mine - she diesn't do it and offering will be too forward as we aern't friends as such and although I'm good at shoulder massage, wouldn't want anything else, especially not without clothes on! I'm very tactile with her pets though and she often just watches (maybe it gives her ideas that i may be good? pets love my touch!). I'm much more sensual than wiq by nature, I think she senses it and there is magnetic feeling sometimes. sleep, do bear in mind that there aer vibes - it's complex but I do think she is starting to care a little bit - i just think she'is not even ALLOWING herself a thought beyond general caring.

Gruffalo but what happens if you try and like it? sounds like you wouldn't want to lose family life anyway, so where would that leave you? Derby is not far though, from King's cross only just over an hour, Herts even nearer if there is fast train. but it's the last on your list of potential issues imo!

crushing so you're definitely going tonight then? Good luck x

Hi all... ok will try to remember all questions and comments. Thanks Crushing and Sleepless - they are really helpful comments and definitely make me feel better about it. Crushing - I can't believe you spoke to your DH about it - I don't think I could. The only way I could bring it up is in a sort of way that might turn him on - but not sure i'd actually want him as part of any experience anyway!! I'd feel too guilty having him right there!!! Crushing... I think a night at an actual gay pub might be just too much to deal with... but is interesting that there even is one there! I work in Watford! What if I see someone I knew!! PS - thanks so much for the offer - but where the hell would I say I'm going to at short notice etc!! I'm actually going out drinking tomorrow night in Watford anyway from about 5.30pm onwards on a works do - so if you're at a loose end - send me a message, come along, and we can just chat about our very similar situations...!! (Nothing else - honest!) x