The Brave Babes Battle Bus - BOINGing Into Spring, The Jesus(WhatNext) Way!

[Mouseface]

Hello, tis me, Mouse

I'm one of the Brave Babes aboard the Battle Bus, on the journey to sobriety.

We have drinkers, non-drinkers, inbetweeners, notquitesurers...... which is all fantastic.

No matter who you are or where you're at in your personal quest to get where you want to be, come grab a seat and join in the natter, just jump right in.

And, if you'd like to see where we've been up until now, HERE is a link to the last thread and the ones before it

See you soon.

MsGee you can do it. Actually you are doing it...... :)

Hey Ma, nice to see you!

Aw thanks all for your lovely support and suggestions.

Well I did cope with boring, help, just about. I've done day 5, I guess that's good isn't it.

Soma no I wasn't alone, was with DP. He had a beer and 2 or 3 glasses of wine and I sat there trying not to stare at his wine. Pathetic really isn't it! Good for you on stopping after one glass earlier - I suspect that if I'd had one glass with dinner I'd have kept on going.

Thanks for the suggestions proud. We had some chocolate tart earlier but I was just yearning for a little glass of sherry to go with it. I did have some cheese and biccies and grapes a little while ago, which is just my biggest comfort food. I don't think anything much would have pleased me tonight, frankly, I was in such a mire of self pity and childish pique.

We watched an episode of montalbano, which is my current televisual equivalent of cheese, and that soothed my temper.

DD is off to my Dparents (realised I put DPs above which implied Dpartner, but I meant mum and stepdad) tomorrow for a week. I'll miss her but I'm kind of relieved that I'll have a week to deal with all this in peace. I love her fiercely, but she's a very strong character and there's nothing I say that she doesn't debate, negotiate or argue with. It's great that she's like that, but it's bloody exhausting. She's home educated so it's pretty relentless (hence my mind is screaming for wine by 5pm). Anyway she'll have a fab week being doted on by her DGPs and frolicking around with the baby lambs in the fields round their house. Plenty of boing for her!

Glad the party went well MsGee.
thurso hope you're wowing them with the quiet confidence that comes with sobriety!

Night Babes x

Thanks kirsty - got through the evening. Glad you enjoyed the ceilidh.

Hi Babes, been here before in a few guises. Hope all is well with you all, you wonderful lot.

I am on day 5 and I have craved booze every day and won and yesterday (after a long talk with my dp on Thurs) about having none in the house til I sort my drinking out so maybe never again he came home with two bottles of wine. He claimed he thought the no booze arrangement is only duriing the week. He doesn't even drink wine, so I do feel he is trying to sabotage my attempt at stopping drinking. I wonder if it gives him some of moral highground as in most other ways, I sort of 'outrank' him ie better job, my eldest isn't his, the house is mine etc and my problem drinking makes him feel superior. I do love him and he has loads of great qualities, but I think this particular issue needs sorted.

Well, I have managed to have wine in the fridge since yesterday without touching it. It does help that dd aged 13 is helping by briniging me cups of tea, she's a wee star. She knows I drink too much, but I am not sure if she knows this is no ordinary health kick. I am starting to realise I am a 'functioning alcoholic' and I have to try and set a good exapmle before it is too late and also try to undo the harm I have done to the way she views drinking. She has never had a drink yet and her younger sibling is only 4, so she hasn't been affected, I hope. However, I have embarrassed eldest dd in front of friends, lost the rag with her and generally been under the influence in front of her far too often. I really hope to change this. At my worst I drink 5 nights a week (I always manage Monday and Tuesday without a drink), at least a bottle of wine per drinking session.

Apologies for the length of this. I am hioping to get some strength from you guys and in return offer support to others. In the past, I have started posting on a couple of threads, but stopped because I went back on the booze and didn't want to be talked out of it. I go back to my very stressful job on Mon after a weeks holiday and hope I can manage to avoid the old coping mechanism of reaching for the wine.

Hi NonAstemia we are both at the end of day 5. Well done us

Hello ladies, I haven't had a drink today even though it's Saturday, and there is an unopened bottle of wine in the fridge.

It sounds like some of the other Babes have had sober nights tonight under trying circumstances - well done! for all who need them.

Night peeps x

(((Isinde))) I feel for you. My DM was here the other night, and I drank. She brought the drink with her, and I tipped it down my throat.

It's day 5 for me too!

Hate to be a right pain in the arse but am finding it fine so far. It's possibly because I've given myself two weeks so there's an end to it. But I hope it's not just that. I do feel quite resolute and changed.

My ds is 10, nearly 11, and I don't want drinking to be normalised anymore or him to take on board that family/good times = drinking alcohol.

It's hard if your dh isn't supporting you. That's what I'm a bit concerned about though so far he has drunk far, far less (though usually he is a bigger drinker than me - has the constitution of an ox!)

(oops X posts. That was to fizzylaces. Sorry )

Isinde :( I am no good at this type of advice as I am new here, but the one sure thing to drive me to drink is a visit from my parents.

Hi fizzy kirsty is on day 5 too, I think - maybe we can form the day 6 gang tomorrow (and so on each day until one of us caves ).

Oh isinde don't beat yourself up. It sounds like very trying times with your parents. And your GPs calling you a waster? Gee that's supportive. I can understand your DP wanting your DTs to have a relationship with your parents. Not easy for you though if they've not been supportive of you. How long are they staying? I hope things look better for you in the morning.

Really am going to bed now. Night x

Ooh proud - you can be in the day 5 gang too!

Hi Proudnscary, lucky you hope it continues to be easy for you.

I have really leant on alcohol this last year after a few really shit things have happened to me/my family/people dying etc which may explain how much my body is used to me feeding it alcohol every night. I need to change and keep telling myself how ridiculous it is to crave something chemical which changes me from the person I am...

Re your son, I agree. My Dad is an alcoholic and I learned a lot from him about how to be a problem drinker.

hi fizzylaces - stay this time - whatever happens. it's not a fair weather bus

isinde - real life help time? maybe? you just sound so utterly sick of it and i really feel for you. i hate seeing you down on yourself like you get when you drink. i reckon you're ready to deal with it but maybe need some real life support.

day 4 here and doing ok. although the shopkeeper asked me if i was pregnant today i have a really bloated tummy - i do look pregnant it's odd and since stopping drinking. don't know why you'd think my tummy would be happier

anyway ds spent the rest of the day saying, 'are you sure there's not a baby in that big tummy' luckily i didn't care today.

glad it's going well proud

i'm wide awake for some reason.

Great there are others on day 5 and that we took our first steps to sobriety on this day, but I would hate for anyone who falls off to feel they have failed... Good luck gang, but no worries if we slip up, it is ineitable that some of us will... xx

I'm delighted to be in the gang :)

Thank you SAF. re the tummy, it's sweet when your child says it, not so much the shopkeeper! Cheeky bugger! I have been eating loads of shite but figure it's just to ease the transition and the amount of calories in wine would be far more than a large bag of doritos, a tub of humous and a slice of coffee cake :)

I have been finding it hard to sleep and wonder if I should cut out the cups of tea What do you drink if not tea or wine?

herbal tea? i tell you what i do when i want tea at night is to have redbush tea with milk - some people go ewww with milk but it's actually just a naturally caffeine free tea - good for the tummy too - maybe i'll have one now

i have been eating crap but haven't really put weight on i've just got a massively protuding tum

the shopkeeper was so embarrassed and trying not to show it. risky business asking a woman if she's pregnant! i think tbf i was standing with my tummy stuck out rubbing it's soreness at the time.

Thanks for the tip, I will steal one from my colleague who drinks redbush befor I commit. I am not a (virtuous) herbal tea type, so should stock up on stuff I like such as fizzy water and lime cordial or I will just end up with boxes of herbal tea stacking up in the kitchen again

Poor shopkeeper, bet he/she is still cringing

I drink a lot of herbal myself - though green tea literally makes me vomit, projectile stylee.

SAF - you are now on day 5 - yay!

For me, feeling slightly flat at Wine O'Clock (then reaching for one or many of the substitutes such as chocs or tomato juice) is way better than feeling hungover or shameful the next day. That's why I'm finding it quite easy and a no brainer (for me personally).

Also I don't think I am in the grips of addiction. I am not sitting on my hands to stop myself drinking or eyeing up dh's glass of wine.

I have a drink problem, that's 100% for sure - if for no other reason than I think about my drinking a lot. That bothers me and exhausts me so it's a problem.

Also a 42 year old drinking 40 units a week is a problem health-wise. That's my main worry.

yes but you're on day 6

morning proud and all other babes.

not quite so boingy this morning as it was hard to get to sleep last night - but after this coffee i'm sure i'll be boinging again.

hope everyone boinging is boinging well and those not boinging are channelling it into aversion to drink not aversion to themselves and self flagellation

Parents can be a drinking trigger, that's for sure. No matter how old or wise we are, they can still push our buttons. It didn't sound like self-pity to me Isinde, rather hurt and anger, I know how it feels.

Well done for getting through last night Mia. How old is your daughter, she sounds exactly like mine (aged 12). The glass of wine I had yesterday hopefully hasn't undone me completely and I'm still grateful it didn't turn into a binge. There was a moment in the pub yesterday when I was standing at the bar and I said to myself - I'm going to buy a bottle of lovely white when I get home and get buzzed, but after I'd had my pub lunch the feeling had gone. Thank God.

you know isinde maybe you have to make clear to your dp just how much it does hurt you to be around them. there are other ways i guess to have them in the dts life than being in your home and in a position to hurt you this much? maybe meeting up regularly in a neutral place or something? i understand her sentiment but you have to take care of you x

glad the feeling went away sadsoma - well done for not continuing down the path.