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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

The Brave Babes Battle Bus - BOINGing Into Spring, The Jesus(WhatNext) Way!

999 replies

Mouseface · 02/04/2012 20:43

Hello, tis me, Mouse Smile

I'm one of the Brave Babes aboard the Battle Bus, on the journey to sobriety.

We have drinkers, non-drinkers, inbetweeners, notquitesurers...... which is all fantastic. Smile

No matter who you are or where you're at in your personal quest to get where you want to be, come grab a seat and join in the natter, just jump right in. Smile

And, if you'd like to see where we've been up until now, HERE is a link to the last thread and the ones before it

See you soon.

OP posts:
helpyourself · 10/04/2012 17:11

So KW applying odaat to you, concentrate on today and don't worry about your birthday.

Where's mouse? In my clunky tough love at saf earlier I dismissed her kindness to saf and I'm feeling a cow. Come back both of you! I have Thanks

venusandmars · 10/04/2012 17:13

Hi KirstyWirsty well done for posting and introducing yourself Smile

I'm not drinking at all at the moment (and haven't for a good while), yet even now if I thought of looking a long time ahead and never drinking again, I'm sure I'd get a bit wobbly. So for me, one day at a time is how I take it, never making false promises to myself about how long it'll go on for, but also never bargaining with myself about if I have have none today I could have 2 tomorrow. I just don't really look ahead (in drinking terms) but instead I enjoy having each day sober, just as it happens.

Until I stopped drinking, my life was one long round of excuses for not trying to stop or slow down - there was always something coming up the next weekend, or a big event planned in the next couple of months. There will never be a 'right' time, you just have to go for it and see how you feel as it unfolds.

helpyourself · 10/04/2012 17:25

chasing- its early days and, depending on when your last drink was, you're perhaps not experiencing physical, but mental cravings. Treat them the same - distract and consider HALT

jesuswhatnext · 10/04/2012 17:30

afternoon!! just cought up with teh thread!

welcome to the gang kirsty! - i go with the others, one day at a time! it just breaks it all down into bite size pieces, forever is a bloody long time and i dont know if im up to it, i DO know though that i can manage the next 12 hours, far more achieveable!

sarah, i worry that dd has inherited my drinking gene Sad right now, at 20, she seems fine, has the odd binge like most people her age, i just worry that one day it might become a problem for her to control it, like you with your ds, i would hate with all my heart to see her suffer in the way we have! any advice in how to broach the subject with her and not sound like a naggy old bag would be welcome!

Greyhound · 10/04/2012 17:33

I've been having cravings since 1 pm. Grrr.

I WILL NOT DRINK TONIGHT.

Somehow, writing that down makes it easier.

jesuswhatnext · 10/04/2012 17:40

grey - i find it helps enormously when im struggling to crash the keyboards with

TODAY I WILL NOT BE DRINKING!!! Grin

its worked for nearly 2 years now! Grin

Greyhound · 10/04/2012 17:53

Yay, well done Jesus! My cravings have subsided - a bit - and I am off out to get some soft drinks and ice cream :)

KirstyWirsty · 10/04/2012 18:00

I'm off to the gym :)

helpyourself · 10/04/2012 18:26

Where are you lovely saf? Come and tell us how today went... No judgey pants- just a lot of identification Smile

Sunnywithachanceofshowers · 10/04/2012 18:34

Hiya Kirsty and welcome, enjoy the gym.

Hello Babes

SarahRT · 10/04/2012 20:02

JNW he came to me. He has never drunk at home apart from the odd glass of beer, but on a rare 'do' that meant Ma was involved, I saw him turn from the big lovely cuddly bear of a man he has become, into a complete out of control drunk. I was so upset, not because he was drunk, but the feelings of guilt and shame washed over me, what the hell had I done to this child??

The next morning he just looked at me with the baby blues and said, 'Mum what do I do?' He has known for a while he has a potential problem, gets wasted on the few times he drinks when he is away from home. He hates it, he hates the lack of control. So I did little, just told him that if he was going to drink, stay with his friends and never be alone, actually never to start drinking alone. He hasn't had a drink since though, he knows that the on/off button is faulty.

The best of what we did to ourselves is to know that we can at least be honest, and compassionate. You and I both know, at any age, telling us what is right or wrong about actively drinking is a red flag. Your DD must see how wonderful her Mum is now, full of boing and strength. I am quite sure that if she is worried, she will come to you.

Chasing, I can still taste and smell a crisp white wine on a Summer's day in the garden, and maybe a Cognac after a lovely meal, but it's a dream now, I loved it, but it never loved me back!! But I don't crave it any more, just become wistful from time to time.Smile

Lolabelle · 10/04/2012 20:05

Just checking in after a relatively boozy weekend Blush
Day 1 and in bed already with DS - missed catching up with everyone but was head in the sand all weekend. Back on track and determined. Again Wink

swallowedAfly · 10/04/2012 20:23

evening. just checking in so i don't jump off.

huge long walk and a few beers and lunch. i didn't feel anyone was enabling me, i'm a big girl and it's down to me to drink or not.

hope everyone had a nice day. looking forward to a no drinking day tomorrow.

well done on day 1 lola and getting head out of the sand.

chasingtail · 10/04/2012 20:29

Sarah "I loved it but it never loved me back", you are so right.
Even a couple of glasses would make me feel dog rough the next day, so clearly this was a one relationship with booze - I just couldn't see that & thought all my troubles would disappear with that first glass. Am still missing the idea of a drink but feel sooo much better for being sober.

[luxuriates across 2 seats on Gerald to bask in new found positivity - seat hogger! Grin]

ilovemyelectricblanket · 10/04/2012 20:31

Popping in to say Im alive and hello.
Im almost well. ??
Drinking daily but doing possibly slightly better than before.

Have realised that at least I am 'thinking' about my drinking.

I used to drink what I wanted when I wanted for as long as I wanted.
I NEVER worried about it. Just hated the hangovers.....

Now. I drink it but I see it, I feel it and I limit it to the best of my current abilities....

Ill not give up giving up. But often feel unworthy of Gerald....

Am here watching and reading everything. MsGee - quite wonderful post. :) You are quite lovely... and so are the rest of you Babes.

:)

Sunnywithachanceofshowers · 10/04/2012 20:53

You're lovely too Blanket xx

Lolabelle · 10/04/2012 20:55

Thanks swallowed. Bloody day 1 again tho Grrrrr Angry

MsGee · 10/04/2012 20:57

Ah blanket thank you

I know what you mean about the thinking ... I've been here for 18 months and have been on the bus, the roofrack, the sidecar and once or twice standing at the side of the road stamping my feet. But I've never been able to ignore it. Once I got here I was aware and couldn't just drink and shrug it off anymore.

My plan tonight worked. Work done, sat in front of tv with fizzy ginger cordial. Smile

jesuswhatnext · 10/04/2012 21:09

blanket - i think 'thinking about your drinking' is a good place to start! to be mindful of you are doing shows that you are getting to a place where you want/need to be! if it only means you cut down it can only be a good thing!

sarah, thanks! dd and i have talked about her drinking/habits, right now i dont think there is a problem, i just want to make sure that she keeps a watchful eye on herself and takes care really!

KirstyWirsty · 10/04/2012 21:30

I'm so glad i signed up today .. went to the gym.. did 5 miles on the treadmill .. on my drive home i was thinking about having a glass of wine. broke routine instead and ate in the dining room with my kindle and a soft drink.. off for a bath and bed now..xx

ilovemyelectricblanket · 10/04/2012 21:36

When I joined this bus I had just rung AA. The lady on the end of the phone gave me her personal mobile number.... She has text me encouragment a few time since....

I really think I need to go (to AA) but I think Mr Blanket would be MORTIFIED if I did that. He most definitely would not get it nor would anyone else I know (apart from you lovely Babes).

I feel Id have to lie to get there (only evening sessions so have to ensure MrB home to look after babies). And to find the enormous pair of bollocks (scuse language) to actually take myself there (when of course I would be drinking) is quite possibly impossible???

I dont have the courage to go....

I need someone to hold my hand? Im too bloody scared to even ask. I feel like the nice lady on the end of the phone of AA was so wonderful I dont want ot let her down by admitting that Im STILL drinking....

Gah.

Angry
jesuswhatnext · 10/04/2012 21:44

blanket - where are you? i would be happy to go with you!

fwiw, AA is not some kind of secret cult which only hopeless deadbeat alkies belong to! i have met some wonderful, kind, understanding people there, the fact that some of them are also in the 'professional class' was simply an aside! Smile your dh and family probably have misconceptions about AA and would be gobsmacked at the type of people who actually attend! and its a bloody shame if you let that get in the way of becoming sober!

jesuswhatnext · 10/04/2012 21:45

btw, the only person you are letting down is yourself!

ilovemyelectricblanket · 10/04/2012 21:56

Lovely Jesus. :o) I agree.... I did Google it and was a little alarmed (at first) but after talking to the seriously lovely lady on the end of the phone - I kind of 'believed'.

I dont see it as cult like but understand they do the Belief Thing (as in God??) but you can choose your own belief and I believe in staying true to me and hoping for the best...

I dont even worry about meeting anyone there that I know...

I just dont see to have the balls to GET MY ARSE THERE.... I mean. How scary is that?

Its Wed at 8pm and Im Kent.

I think that I should text the AA lady who was incredibly supportive (I wept quietly on the phone to her and then not so quietly) and I think/am certain she would help....

But yet I dont seem to have the guts to do that....

HUB would just be mortified that I CANT JUST STOP ON MY OWN.... Yet he took 5 years and hypnotherapy and nicotine replacement to give up smoking.....

Oh god. Im a bit miserable... Im sorry.

And thank you Sunny!

SarahRT · 10/04/2012 22:16

Blanket you are just so adorable!

If this lady has shown you a helping hand I would grab it, if only at the moment to talk to her in real life. There will be nothing that will confuse or phase her if she is a sponsor. The higher power thing can be translated in many ways I think, just give yourself the choice, that then equals the power within.

If you had any other type of illness I am quite sure that dh would be mortified if you didn't get some help. Ironic that giving up smoking is just so much more acceptable and often a conversation piece, what a funny old worldSmile

Just keep safe and I still see you plumped up on your pillows Blanket. xxx