The Brave Babes Battle Bus - BOINGing Into Spring, The Jesus(WhatNext) Way!

[Mouseface]

Hello, tis me, Mouse

I'm one of the Brave Babes aboard the Battle Bus, on the journey to sobriety.

We have drinkers, non-drinkers, inbetweeners, notquitesurers...... which is all fantastic.

No matter who you are or where you're at in your personal quest to get where you want to be, come grab a seat and join in the natter, just jump right in.

And, if you'd like to see where we've been up until now, HERE is a link to the last thread and the ones before it

See you soon.

Oh Mouse!!! Sweetheart!!

Life is such a bugger sometimes.

Have you heard of Gary Chapman (he is a mavel)

The Testing Child (not that your Nemo is testing he is your beautiful Nemo and has special needs - but at testing times this for me comes in handy for me)!

1. DONT TAKE IT PERSONALLY!
2. Try not to compare to other more compliant siblings.
3. Pick your battles
4. Take a second look at what is happening.
5. Dont read school reports as a phophecy of future.
6. Catch them doing something right and praise them to bits.
7. Give them a skill of their own.

They are not all relevant to your Nemo - I just wanted to point out No. 1 to you.

The reason he is worse with you sometimes is that he knows your love is unconditional and that no matter how far he pushes you - you will always love him and be there for him.

Hope that helps.... just a little bit. x

SAF top work! :)

Awww, Blanket, that's lovely of you I do take it personally, I know I shouldn't. It hurts me when he rejects me and what I ask of him. Stupid or what!?

He's fast asleep now. I know why he's been like someone else's child today, it's because I am utterly exhausted and have no fight in me. I'm sharp, grumpy, moody and swinging from desperately unhappy with the house and what's going on, to thinking F@#k it!

Life's tough but it's only for a while longer. I've had a little think about what in particular has upset me today. It's the fact that when I've asked him to do something, he has point blank refused. Which is so not like him.

So then I thought some more..... his nose is bleeding (often happens) were his feeding tube has rubbed his skin . He got little sleep last night, the night before too because of his restricted breathing and he has been waking up cold so that never helps.

All in all, he's had an off couple of days, just like we all do, only he can't tell me that he feels that way. He can't say that his nose hurts, he's tired, he's cold, he's fed up with the builders being here......

He can't tell me.

Saf - BLOODY WELL DONE YOU!!! xx

Ma - there is no rhyme or reason to our feelings towards our parents. Give yourself a break lovely - you are doing what is needed and that puts you in the position of being the 'nasty' daughter - but you know it has to be done. It will work out one way or another my love

hang in there Babe - it's a phase like any other child - testing the boundries, testing his place in the world, growing up....you will both come through it sweets

xxxxxxxx

mouse missed this, hope things are better soon.
Thanks all. got all the unfinished business safely back in its box and under lock and key. He'll be fine. I'll be fine.

On another note, DH pinned my arms to the bed last night and yelled "Keep still and don't struggle".......he was fast asleep, reliving the shift from hell at work which resulted in two kids being restrained, a smashed oven door, a concussed female co-worker, an emergency call to the police, a 12 year old handcuffed and DH being bitten in the chest and nearly losing a nipple! For newbies, DH works in a residential unit for kids with behavioural problems! Scared the bejasus out of me at 2am though
The 12 year old who was cuffed by the police has "aggression issues"....his mother beat him senseless with a hammer once .
whenever we think we are not parenting very well, we ARE! Believe me - there are kids out there with parents who just don't stand a fucking chance!
Sorry - seems I've still got a parenting thing going on tonight - I'll shut up now

hey lovelies, I have nothing to say that will be of the remotest help to most of you, so please just now that somewhere out there, there is a venus who is thinking of you quietly xx

know not now [bublush]

saf well done! Hugs to ma and mouse.

Hope to hear from grey this evening...

Sorry ma and mouse are having such a hard time at the moment. You both have so much on your plates.

Saf - well done on your alcohol-free shop visit. I popped out for onions earlier and felt very odd literally just buying onions - would normally have definitely been a good reason to get another bottle in, 'just in case'.

I'm just checking in to say I am off to bed sober for the first time in about 10 days. Feeling slightly sick from the large bag of mini eggs I just consumed, but it's better than a bottle or two of wine, eh?

Not sure how I'll feel about not drinking tomorrow - friends over for lunch - but I'll deal with that in the morning.

G'night all.

Hi Mouseface and jesuswhatnext. Thanks for the welcome. I've got a lot of little girls in my house for a sleepover tonight. There's a one-third drunk bottle of wine in the fridge but I've just finished a cup of tea. I'm making this day one, not of the rest of my life, but I've decided I'm not having a drink until Monday if I can manage it.

And I'm going to stop sitting on MN or the internet generally, put my notes in the new lever arch files I bought yesterday and start revising or at least working out a gameplan for my exams at the end of July. I'm training to become a doctor and it's both the best and the worst thing in my life!

Oops, you're obviously better known as mouse. Sorry for the faux pas

no faux pas, she answers to anything! i think i have read that the medical profession is known for its hard drinking culture (yes, those nosy gps asking searching questions about our 'units per week' which we ALWAYS lie about are just as bad as us! ) (which is proberbly why they know to add on at least another 25% to the figure we give! )

Could you throw the wine out lizzie?

Yes, I could. I'm not tempted tonight. I will throw it out tomorrow and post on here to say I've done it.

Hey all.
A sober night for me last night. Id like to have a little BOING but DCs woke me up at crack of dawn.... ! Fume.
Still. Sober night for me (want to watch that I do like to repeat myself) and Im happy. :)
Just wonderfing if Ginger is out there (in here?)??? Doesnt matter what your doing or not doing - I just hope you are ok.....

Anyway. We are off to see my Dad today and he lives on the coast so lots of sea side walking and lunch. He always pushes a bottle of red (yes the whole bottle) in my hand when I walk in the door but today I will be abstaining....

Lizzie have you been up early this moring too? With lots of little girls
runnign around and over excited?! WELL DONE on restraint last night. Im really pleased for you. :) And actually well done on having a sleep over - the thought terrifies me! :)

Hi to all. Hope you have a wonderful day today. Greyhound/Lola - how are you?
ferfux - I hope your lunch is wonderful and that you make a decision that suits you....

Morning blanket. Well done on your sober night. I sympathise on being woken early. DD2 has basically been up since 4.30. Still it would be much worse with a hangover. Hope you have a good day with your dad - sounds a bit tricky if he is so keen for you to drink, but you sound clear in your mind about how to handle it.

Welcome lizzie. Hope you survived the sleepover. Am not looking forward to my DDs reaching the sleepover stage. You must be incredibly busy with 2 DDs and you medicine degree. Good luck on the bus.

god yes - the level of study needed for medicine plus two kids frightens me just thinking about it! i'll hopefully be starting my MSc this year which also has a practice element and i'm worried enough about finding the energy for that and i only have one little boy.

well i did my day 1 not exactly boinging but definitely feel better this morning than i did yesterday morning. today i will not be drinking - commitment made even though my fingers hesitated over typing it.

ate a whole tub of ben and jerry's last night but still, it's better than a whole tub of ben and jerry's plus a bottle of wine so it's a start. must buy easter eggs/chocs today so will have to run the gauntlet of passing wine aisles again but should be fine. commitment made.

it really is getting to the point where you're willing to make that commitment isn't it? i always say day 1 is the hardest but in reality for me it's getting to the point where i'm willing to say day 1 that is the real challenge.

Well done SAF and Blanket

I am going to struggle a bit today. It's a wedding, and I know I will want to drink. Do I just drink and think, well it's a wedding? Or do I just abstain?

you have to make a decision basically hopefully.

if you want to not drink you have to decide it and get strategising or it will never happen.

if you want to drink you can make a plan for damage limitation and stick to it (eg. alternate alcoholic and non alcoholic drinks, drink 2 non alcoholic drinks before you start drinking, stop drinking at time x etc).

if you go not being sure you will end up drinking and probably messy drinking too.

imo!

as in you 'just' drink or 'just' abstain - both are active paths that you choose and do stuff on.

Morning all! Lizzie that's sensible.

Well done saf and blanket

Hi hopfully? What are you doing at the moment ( I don't mean cup of tea feeding the cat-wise[busmile]) where are you re booze- abstaining? reducing? How long?

thanks help - how are you doing? been a while - think you were totally abstaining weren't you?

I control drank/ bargained had periods of abstention with a view to drinking again, then made a stopped drinking 2+ years ago.

It has been easy, but I've put a lot of work into it, it wasn't a switch flicking and then it wasn't an issue. The cravings stopped quite early, but I'm careful to stay well emotionally by avoiding avoid triggers (like overtiredness, hunger, getting angry for no good reason except the buzz.)

made a stopped drinking [buconfused]= I stopped drinking

it has been easy wasn't a mistyping. [busmile]

Not drinking, with the support of AA, family, friends and this thread is a walk in the park in comparison to drinking.