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Original poster

Does this sound right re dp being on birth cert of his ex's baby who was not his?

115 replies

hattieboo2012 · 15/03/2012 06:18

dp met his ex when she was about 5 months pg. The real father left never to show his face again. Dp was with her til the baby was 18 months old. He left her coz she used him for money and was very materialistic. They never lived together.

I recently found something on dps old phone in his search history that was about getting his name removed from a birth certificate. So I questioned dp about it.

He said that hos ex had dps name put on birth certificate when baby was born without him knowing about it. He only found it was on a few months before he left her...could this be true?

Also he said he went through a solicitor and got his name removed from birth certificate. It was easy for solicitor to do this as his ex admitted putting it on without his consent. Does this sound true to ear? I always thought it was impossible to get name removed from bc as it's an historical document?

OP posts:

JaneB1rkin · 15/03/2012 06:25

I've no idea about the legality and such but it is perfectly possible she put his name on it without his consent.

How awful for her to do that. And good that he had it removed.

I hope it is all true, for your sake, I'd imagine personally that if he isn't the father and was fraudulently named as such, and she admitted this, it would be easy enough to get removed.

If she had denied it was fraudulent he might have had to get a paternity test done to establish it.

JaneB1rkin · 15/03/2012 06:26

What I mean is, when i registered my son I could have named his father - I think - although could I? I'm not so sure now. I think he may have had to be there, if I was going to put his name down.

Sorry, just totally contradicted myself.

I would ring up the register office and ask them.

Nospringflower · 15/03/2012 06:28

I'm in Scotland but here if you are not married both partners need to register the birth if you want the father on it I.e. the man would have to know his name was on it.

Kayzr · 15/03/2012 06:29

It is the same in England. You can not put someone on the birth certificate as the father on you own unless you are married. He would have had to have been with her to do so.

dilbertina · 15/03/2012 06:30

I thought if parents are unmarried they have to register birth together to put fathers name on? So it's possible he agreed to his name going on at the time, although knowing he wasn't biological father? - and then changed his mind...don't know mechanics of correcting a birth certificate sorry!

I don't think he's telling whole truth here.

insertsomethingwitty · 15/03/2012 06:31

If an unmarried man wants to be on the birth certificate he has to be present when the baby is registered.

She wouldn't have been able to put him on unless he was there (and willing)

Littlefish · 15/03/2012 06:31

I have a feeling that from a certain date (not sure when that was!), that the father's name could only be registered if he was physically there at the meeting with the registrar. I also can't remember whether this applies to married parents, or just non married parents.

God, that was a useless post!

Littlefish · 15/03/2012 06:32

Bloody hell - and I managed to cross post with lots of far more succinct people!

seaweedhead · 15/03/2012 06:34

Me and dp aren't married. To get his name on the birth certificate he had to come along when registering them.

Sorry but looks like your dp consented to this.

Cutelittlecatlover · 15/03/2012 06:34

When I registered ds' birth 2 1/2 years ago they told me that you can only name the father on the birth certificate if he's present when the baby is being registered unless you're married to him. It does sound really dodgy to me, sorry.

seeker · 15/03/2012 06:35

How long ago was this?

HereIGo · 15/03/2012 06:40

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ripsishere · 15/03/2012 06:46

Or he lied about it being his child.

catsareevil · 15/03/2012 07:00

Agree with everyone else, if they werent married hen he had to be there, so he must have agreed to it at the time.

RealLifeIsForWimps · 15/03/2012 07:10

It may not be his child, but he probably agreed to it at the time, in the flush of love, and now feels like a dick who's been exploited and doesnt want to admit to it. Presumably if he can prove the child isnt his then he can have his name removed. I doubt he would be dumb enough to ask for it to be removed if he was the father, as it could easily be proved that he was.

Lougle · 15/03/2012 07:14

hattieboo, all of the posters are correct.

"A mother can register the birth of her child on her own, regardless of whether she is married or not. She can also register the birth jointly with the father.

A father can only register the birth on his own if:

-he was married to the mother when the child was born or conceived, or

-the mother has completed a statutory declaration form naming him as the father, or

-there is a parental responsibility agreement in force, or

-he has an appropriate court order.

If the father is not married to the mother but registers the birth jointly with her, he will acquire parental responsibility." Advice Guide

Original poster

hattieboo2012 · 15/03/2012 07:15

I just text him and asked him straight out. I don't care anymore. I want to know the truth if i'm having his baby and marrying him I deserve to know everything!!! He text me back saying she told the registrar she had no partner, didn't know the fathers name, and that as far as I can tell, he's telling me that she somehow got his name on after (penned it herself)...I don't know but I'm glad I asked him.

OP posts:

Original poster

hattieboo2012 · 15/03/2012 07:17

The child is coming up to age 3 as far as I'm aware.

OP posts:

EdithWeston · 15/03/2012 07:19

A woman can put her husband on a BC (as the legal assumption is that a child born to a married woman is a child of the marriage).

An unmarried woman cannot, however, put anyone down as father - the father has to be present and give his consent. Assuming you are in UK, something is wrong with his description if events. Any idea what this might be? Could he be lying about the circumstances with his ex, so perhaps the child is his?

Kayzr · 15/03/2012 07:20

If she has penned it in herself then surely she's broken some law about forging a legal document.

savoycabbage · 15/03/2012 07:20

You (or he) could look up the birth certificate in that case to see if he is actually on it.

ErikNorseman · 15/03/2012 07:24

He is saying she wrote it on herself? Does he think you are a mug? Unless his name has been added by the registrar (and it is possible to do this, with the man's consent) then it is meaningless and he doesn't need to have himself removed! Good grief, either he is absurdly gullible or thinks you are.
If you know where the child was born and the mother's details you can apply for a copy birth certificate and see who is named on it.

antsypants · 15/03/2012 07:25

If it is any help, I'm not married and my daughters dad had to register her birth with me, I would not have been able to do it without him present... Also, just to echo another pp, go to the library and look it up.

Lougle · 15/03/2012 07:29

"she told the registrar she had no partner, didn't know the fathers name, and that as far as I can tell, he's telling me that she somehow got his name on after (penned it herself)...I don't know but I'm glad I asked him."

It doesn't work like that, hattieboo.

When you go to register your child, they will write down all the information on a template. They will then show you the information, and ask you to confirm it is correct.

Then, they will enter all the details on their computer and print a draft birth certificate for you to check.

Only once you have confirmed that this is correct, will they get their actual birth certificate out.

The birth certificates are serial numbered, and the Registrar has to document the serial number, the name of the child, mother, etc. The registrar also has to do it for each copy she produces.

Finally, an entry is made in the Register of Births.

If your DP's Ex had 'penned him in' then she would only have been able to do it on the copies of the birth certificates held by her. The actual Register of Births is not in the public domain, so she couldn't doctor that.

If your DP truly thinks that his name was falsely put on a birth certificate, then he can ask to check the original document. It will only have his name on it if he accompanied the Ex and agreed to it.

There is something very, very wrong with this description of events

Kayzr · 15/03/2012 07:31

I don't think he is telling you the truth. He wouldn't need to see a solicitor as like the other posters have said it wouldn't be in the system.

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