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Original poster

Smitten with dp but he's a bad, baaad kisser...help!

90 replies

JingleBallsAndMistletoe · 15/02/2012 22:13

Hello, i'm after some advice, in fact i'm desperate for it!

I've found myself a amazing man and altho I cant find many faults he is THE worst kisser i have ever met and i dont think i can take one more of them.

Every single time we kiss i have to wipe my face after, and even if i could get past the dribbling the actual smooch is awful too, he just pokes his tongue in and out or if its a full on snoggy snog he'll stick it out and just leave it out, I understand i sound really harsh but I was hoping some wonderful mn advice would help me.

I've tried to tell him re the tongue, and have done the whole let me kiss you thing and now i'm at a loss, The odd thing is, the sex is fab..as long as i get him to kiss my neck instead of my mouth so how do i go about making the kisses better? I've started turning my head now(not meaning to) and feel awful so please, any tips?!

Thank you xx

OP posts:
Lueji · 15/02/2012 22:20

Sorry, no. All I can think of is of an episode of Sex and the City and I think Charlotte dumped the guy. :(

Any chance of actually telling him how to kiss better?

cyb · 15/02/2012 22:22

You HAVE to tell him, and show him

There are few things in life more dispiriting than a bad kiss

You have my sympathies

But you let him put his in your but cant tell him that?

Original poster
JingleBallsAndMistletoe · 15/02/2012 22:27

oh dont say that!

I thought the 'let me kiss you thing' was obvious enough to say i dont like how you're doing it(done quite a few times) I dont know how he'd take it if i said it out right 'you're a crap kisser'...seems very mean and i'm not sure i have the balls

OP posts:
Original poster
JingleBallsAndMistletoe · 15/02/2012 22:29

sorry cross posted!

and i think i'd be hurt if someone said that to me thats why i'd rather not if it can be avoided!

OP posts:
Quichy · 15/02/2012 22:29

I once dated a guy who was a terrible kisser. He used to stick his tongue in and then just make it go around in circles, it was plain weird. Sounds petty but it's a massive issue. I couldn't stand to kiss him, we didn't last long at all.

RandomMess · 15/02/2012 22:30

Can you phrase it

"I'm really fussy but I really only like kissing without tongues"

or words to that ilk.

cyb · 15/02/2012 22:30

Do what Charlotte tried to do in SATC

'I like it when you...'

If he still licks your chin, not sure what to suggest

HaveYouTakenLeaveOfYourCervix · 15/02/2012 22:31

it's ok. after a few years you don't do tongue kissing any more so you needen't ever do it again.

does he cook? and clean?

Original poster
JingleBallsAndMistletoe · 15/02/2012 22:33

oh dear...In all other aspects he's fantastic, i would happily spend the rest of my life with him, marriage kids the lot....

OP posts:
Beamur · 15/02/2012 22:33

Hmm, you've got to tell him - I'd emphasise the bit about you liking sex with him first though Grin it might soften the blow.
I snogged a boy on holiday (pre-DP days) who was a dreadful kisser, tact not being my strongest point, I pulled away shouting 'no no no, that's awful' but thankfully he was desperate enough willing to try it my way instead, which was much better.

RandomMess · 15/02/2012 22:33

Cervix I like your style Grin

cyb · 15/02/2012 22:35

If he likes you too, he will probably do anything you ask

RandomMess · 15/02/2012 22:35

"Stop trying to ram your tongue down my throat and kiss me instead"

Original poster
JingleBallsAndMistletoe · 15/02/2012 22:37

sorry more x-posts!

Ha ha i like your thinking HaveYouTakenLeaveOfYourCervix, but that would be a loooong few years!!

And kissing without tongues is odd!

I'm going to have to hunt down this episode of SATC and make him watch it too so when i do he he knows what i'm doing!!

OP posts:
perceptionreality · 15/02/2012 22:38

How have you managed to get smitten in the first place??

Original poster
JingleBallsAndMistletoe · 15/02/2012 22:38

...or is that eeeevil?!

OP posts:
RandomMess · 15/02/2012 22:40

Okay tell him "I only like a tiny bit of tongues" and if he goes too deep or horrible pull back like you've just been stung and go "urgh too much", then leap on him again quick.

Original poster
JingleBallsAndMistletoe · 15/02/2012 22:40

I knew him a long time before we got together perceptionreality, was 2 thirds of the way there already and the sex part clinched it! hee hee

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Original poster
JingleBallsAndMistletoe · 15/02/2012 22:44

Can i also point out i've joked he's dribbled on me a few times too but to no avail..

RandomMess that sounds reasonable, still cringe at the thought of it tho!

OP posts:
perceptionreality · 15/02/2012 22:46

Ah I see....

RandomMess · 15/02/2012 22:46

Deep breath and go for it.

Has he not had many relationships?

lovesadirtylie · 15/02/2012 22:53

some people just dont seem to get it with kissing.
Bad kissing is vile & unbearable I have no idea how to turn a bad kisser into a good one.
If the sex is otherwise good I've just made out that I dont like kissing.
It's disappointing tho :(

tallwivglasses · 15/02/2012 22:53

Does his style of kissing really turn him on, or do you think he just hasn't moved on since he was 14?

If it's the first one, you're fighting a losing battle. If it's the second one, there's hope.

My friend went out with a bloke who loved biting (think pirhana, rather than foot-nibbling little fishies). Every time she made him stop he lost his erection Shock

NotMostPeople · 15/02/2012 22:54

I had a boyfriend like this, tried all the tactics you've tried I even tried saying 'this is how I like it'. All to no avail, in the end I married him thinking it was a silly thing to focus on and whilst everything else was good it wouldn't matter but it did. We got divorced and I honestly think it was a good part of the reason why.

If he's great you have got to stop being subtle and tell him.

Original poster
JingleBallsAndMistletoe · 15/02/2012 23:04

well that doesnt fill me with confidence NotMostPeople..

Grin @ Every time she made him stop he lost his erection!!

He's 31 so you would think he'd know better, Ok he is coming round tomo night so between now and then i need to come up with a plan of action..

lovesadirtylie - you pretended you weren't into kissing? did you not miss it?

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