The Brave Babes Battle Bus - New Year, New Start And With A Firm Resolution In Their Hearts.

[Mouseface]

Hello, I'm Mouse and I have an ever changing relationship with alcohol.

This is the Brave Babes Battle Bus, it's a support thread for those who feel their drinking habits are not what they should be, or even those of another.

Sober, drinking or somewhere in between, come take a seat.

And for those who would like to know where this all started, HERE is a link to the threads before this one.

Make THIS year THE year that you change your life, for the better.

Have a Happy New Year, full of memories to treasure, not to forget.

huey - stay brave!! you are doing fantastically, nearly a month under your belt already! good on you!!

Thanks JWN!

Think it was the thought of stopping that scared me the most. Life is not yet perfect but so much easier without the stress and logistics of daily intensive drinking.

I'm not complacent though!

have stopped before and slipped back into it very easily. This time however it feels different, life was so shit last year that it HAS to get better.

This time I'm not missing it and have stopped counting the days. Reading responses from people who know has been really helpful.

Have had lots on judgmental responses from people close to me my mother. The support here is tremendous hope you can find a space for me on board.
xx

plenty of space on this bus huey!

i understand totally about the thought of not drinking, its so so scary, i think that thought was actually even more scary than the thought of what i could lose if i didnt stop, iyswim?, it had been with me, been a crutch for so long that i simply couldnt imagine a day without it, i promise you that it gets easier though, now, im actually frightened of picking up a drink, im scared of that feeling of losing control over everything, im scared that it would take hold of me and never let me go, i know that sounds quite mad, but now i have MY life back, MY life, not the one the booze dictated to me, i couldnt possibly go back now!

Hello lovelies
Just a quick visit, still doing okay. Big hugs to you Mouse, hope today went okay. Hiya Huey.

Onemorning xx

Hi Huey, welcome . You're doing brilliantly. Well done. Lots of support from people who know just what it's like, and no judgemental responses. Keep posting.

Christj how is DH today? I'm not surprised you're tired and feeling the pressure. You've got a hell of a lot to deal with. Good for you for not drinking. It'd only make everything worse.

Saf you still awake? Gotta love being woken in the middle of the night by children...at least he's not seriously ill. You must be shattered.

Mouse how did it go today? Was thinking of you.

Hope everyone's doing OK. Tonight I will not be drinking. Day 23. Isn't it strange how just a few weeks ago I would be desperately 'needing' to drink by this time (who am I kidding, like I could wait until after 7...). But wine has just crossed my mind for the first time today, and I just thought naaaah. Easy. No internal dialogue, no drama, no guilt, no desire at all. Just a quick decision not to drink. Shows how much of it was habit I think. Like you said JWN, I just don't want to go back to my old life either. And I don't want to lose control. Far better to face life head-on rather than hide from it in a bottle. You can't hide forever.

Have good nights Babes

Think I'll pass, thanks all the same Isinde

Just checking in whilst the kettle boils. Been helping ds with french homework and dd with spanish so all a bit ooh la la here

Hope it went ok today Mouse

Hello Huey you are doing so well, have you experienced The Boing yet? Stick with us and before you know it people will be coming to you for advice .

no thanks to vegan variations on stuff thanks inde - still recovering from the days of vegan cheese - bleurgh! my joined at the hip best friend for years was a vegan and determined to make me healthier. even she agreed vegan cheese was the work of the devil though.

yes i'm still awake but i hope for not too long. ds has lorded it all day at home and finally conked out on the sofa this evening - carrying a near 5yo deadweight and pulling down and up pants to put him on loo whilst holding him to carry him to bed is hard work! i'm sure he will soon be too heavy to carry. sleeping like a baby now bless him and hope he'll be fine tonight.

very lazy day. no alcohol till now when i've just poured myself a little glass of sherry as a nightcap. tomorrow no alcohol again - well that's the plan.

welcome on board huey this is your year i reckon.

sending love to mouse - hope you're ok after today's treatments x

Thanks for the lovely welcome [grins] it's good to know that support is here.

Oooh that was odd! I just hit 'I'm on' and found for the first time since Oct 2010 I wasn't 'on' Brave Babes!
S/SMum you are doing so well, keep it up. Indie I hope you and the twins get well soon. Mouse I hope you are OK, come and let us know.
to all the other Babes

hi all
still here, still not being successful.
guess I'd rather be fat, broke, hungover and guilty...

faire I think boing might be pushing it but I'm certainly more chipper of a morning, taking anti depressant meds too and they do seem to be helping. Early days I know.

Love to all you lovely lovely babes xx

Hey everyone. dementedma doesn't sound like you are having much fun, I am sorry. I remember up thread you said you and your DH were going to have four alcohol free days a week. Is it a struggle keeping to that? I know it would be for me.

isinde wishing you all strength for tonight, hone the twins recover quickly

Welcome huey, lovely to see you here. I am so glad you have made such a positive start to January

faire I don't know. DH is not a lazy man, easily distraced, but not lazy and not wilfully unkind, I guess depression is just an unbelievably selfish disease. It drives me nuts. I do do a LOT I guess. Came home from work, DH said he was feeling 'sad' which is actually different from his normal 'not doing too good' phrase. I sorted out kitchen while he watched some telly with the kids (don't normally do this, just read to them usually but i needed to unload shopping and he wasn't in a state to read). Then he went for a run (i encouraged him to, sometimes it can snap him out of it) and I put the children to bed and made dinner. He came back, had a shower, ate dinner and is now sitting at his desk trying to work. His concentration was very poor today so god knows what he did all day. Suggested he went for a run to lift his mood earlier in the day ,but he didn't want to. I am trying to get it through to him that he needs to proactively do things to improve his mood as much as he can, so we don't all have to suffer.

In years gone past DH would have realised that his actions were making us all suffer, but in this selfish fog he can't see it. It has been nearly two years now. It makes me Cross. It really makes me cross.

Wtf is vegan cheese? How is such a thing possible

yeah christie the 4 day thing didn't pan out. haven't even had one day!
I sympathise with you on the DH depression front although my DH doesn't sound as if he was ever quite as bad. I supported him loads until I couldn't take it any more and actually remember getting hold of him by the shirt front and enunciating very clearly (after a lot of other stuff) "You have one choice left. Get counselling, or get a divorce!"
Sadly for me, he chose counselling

Ma. (((hugs))) x x

Do you have a plan, dementedma? Will you start again tomorrow?

Christi - you need to get some outside help. Start with GP. And take it from there. It sounds like DH is in need of professional opinion . He could be bi- polar... Start the ball rolling... Take it from there x

I'll try again tomorrow i suppose
silver how's your mum?

Hey Ma

She's a bit brighter - still very weak - simple answer is I don't know - visited this evening and she hadn't seen a doctor.

BUT - you know what - a couple of months ago I would have found every excuse and every reason under the sun to not visit in the evening - my drinking time - I'm not saying I found it easy, actually , you know what - it certainly wasn't hard................

what I'm trying to say is that there has been a shift in my mental addiction - still drinking but somehow the desperation is very much altered. The FEAR is getting less

Off to bed kids

Long day

[sleeeeedeeep]

xxx

dt1 sounds like my kind of girl inde hope you all got some sleep in the end.

morning everyone - happy humpday again already. ds bit snotty etc today but am going to send him to school as i don't think there's anything really wrong - just had a nasty start to a simple bug i think. will give paracetamol this morning before he goes and ask school to keep an eye on him.

i've had his tummy bug yesterday and today. bit of a pita (boom tish) but it might kick start my diet

hope everyone has good days. yesterday i had one glass of sherry and today i will not be drinking.

Wishing you all a fantastic 'bump of the week' day.

I'm feeling rather low energy and looking for excuses to hibernate. I've got some cooking to do an, application form to fill in and I will call my sponsor, so I definitely get to a meeting tonight.

Haven't been for a fortnight

Morning everyone.
silver he has been checked for bi-polar, as the mood swings have occurred for a while, but he hasn't had very long ups and downs which is what they look for apparently.

Am trying to get him to go away for a couple of weeks to his home country, and get some sunshine and R&R, and some fresh eyes on his case and therapy

spoke too soon - ds was suddenly very bright red faced and hot again and complaining about aches in his joints and his tummy. i think he is exaggerating and i don't believe his tummy really does hurt as he's eating fine but he is feverish. so school has been phoned.

dog and i didn't get to go for a walk yesterday with him being home ill and really need to today. going to see how the meds settle to see if ds can handle it or if not maybe ask my dad to come sit with him for an hour if he's not too busy whilst i take the dog out.

i feel really bad that he had three days off last week and is now on second day off this week - up to then he'd never had a day off (started in september). sorry for thread hijack but those ahead of me in the parenting game can you give advice? does it look bad to the school or is it normal to have things all come along in the same month? and how do you tell when you're being played and when they're genuinely ill? also a bit worried that he's getting to like this staying home business.

well done for deciding to get to a meeting helpyourself hope you find some energy - send any spare over here.