The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Here's To STAYING On A Sober Holiday!

[Mouseface]

Hello, I'm Mouse

I have an abusive and volatile relationship with alcohol.

This is the Brave Babes Bus, it's filled with sober, drinking and somewhere in between Babes who are all here for the journey ahead, whatever that may entail.

EVERYONE is welcome on this Bus. No-one will judge what you are going through, what you drink, what you don't or what you do.

Come take a seat.

Take a peek at the journeys so far (including the thread by JWN that started this whole journey off) HERE

Evening all

My lovely friend and I have been to a lush spa today and had 4 hours of heaven.

I had three and a half beers yesterday. This morning I felt like death warmed up. Not at all nice. BUT, no wine or spirits thank Jeff.

thurso - huge congrats to DS1. You must be uber proud of him xx

We're off out for a walk with the dogs soon, (friend has brought her dawg too) and then off for dinner. I have also joined a health club. I can use the pool, sauna, Jacuzzi and gym. Plus I get money off in their restaurant so that's a bonus!!

So, I'll see you all tomorrow. Be safe and be strong xxxx

thurso oh, now I get what you're talking about. You silly kipper
have been back on the A level boasting thread - too funny. all the uber parents casually mentioning that DD/S got 3 A stars plus a few "safety net As" to get that place at Magdalen etc. One person concerned about accommodation - should they buy a 3 bed flat for DS now or wait and see how he settles in first? Oh , the agony of decision. many already talking about getting the papers back to see where DC went wrong and looking for tutors......maybe it's me, maybe I don't care enough but I feel sorry for their kids.
I'm probably just bitter and jealous as I hear DD1 tonight trying to work out how to go to college to do her HND (university too espensive) and still live at home and commute. Wants to live out but can't afford a room until she gets a job to do while she studies to pay the rent.

Ma

I have just had a 1 hr phone call with my friend, who hasn't heard from her daughter all day (my son said that she just wanted to be on her own, so I have broken a confidence ), and had to tell her that she was staying with us tonight, after they had all been clubbing, her Mum is just so lovely, and so sad about it.

I haven't been back on that thread, in fact I don't think I will chance any more meanderings!

I would recommend Fanny Annie's cookery school to anyone, if I could materialise it!

bloody rotten exams!!

P.s Ma

If Dd is only 20, she is not yet classed as a mature student, and so should be able to apply for grant funding or Government funding for her course, I would think. Scotland are much better about providing for education than us in the South!

Morning all,

Hope everyone is well this lovely Friday morning.

I am colouring my hair in preparation for maybe venturing into a hairdressers for the first time in 18months quite a long time. My fear is because I hair pull when stressed - now there's been a fair bit of that lately - and they always laugh, and I always think it looks worse afterwards. And I do a pretty good job of cutting it myself - not as good as I am at DD's, who has a sort of layered bob with a fringe that I would never have imagined I'd have the skill or confidence to do. Anyway enough about hair.

Am feeling more comfortable lately with the stuff I was wittering about last week about cutting out all my alcoholic behaviours before starting my steps. Not quite there on the refined sugar though - what savoury things can I nibble (I am allowing myself dark chocolate, for now...)

Has anyone else read Rosie Boycott's memoirs? (A nice girl like me) I've just finished it - amazingly honest and so much to identify with. Enough chattering, time to see what colour I have gone!

Love to all x

Morning all,

What colour have you gone Noteven?

Dh and I came downstairs this morning to find a note from Dc to say that 7(!!!) of his friends were staying over, and that all was well with thier universe , bacon sandiches all round, I think .

I have retrieved my laptop from the study, slightly disturbing two sleeping mounds on the sofa!, and so it looks like I am confined to the kitchen, garden, or my room, for a good while!

Ah, to be young again .

xx

sandwiches, even!

thurso I'm thinking that perhaps I'll open a cookery school to rival Fanny Annie's - would call it Venus Penus or maybe Venis Penis . I do actually teach cookery, I work as a volunteer for a homelessness charity and teach cookery to people who are moving out of homelessness into their first tenancy. Such a variety of people, and so many reasons why people have been homeless; many with enduring mental health problems, or drug problems, but also many, many with alcohol problems. After long term homlessness so many people lose the confidence to buy food and cook it properly. I really love doing it. This week one chap was over the moon - he had had his 8 year old son to visit him and for the first time ever he cooked his tea (sausage casserole and mashed potato) - he was nearly in tears with excitement.

ma having seen several of dd1's friends graduate and still not get jobs, I'd encourage anyone to do a more vocational qualification if they found something that really interested them.

thurso when dd1 was that age, I often could only tell how many people were sleeping in the house by counting the number of shoes left at the door .

Venus (I know you don't want to hear it!) what a fantastic thing to do, practical help like that makes more difference than anything. I always remember the smile of a boy I taught to put on his socks and tie his own shoelaces, no-one had ever been at home to show him when he was little.

Now, I have looked in the hall, and there is only 1 pair of shoes, and they are Dc's, do you think they are all asleep still wearing them?

I have cooked a tray of sausages, and grilled two packs of bacon, so think I am prepared

Morning

Well done for your DC Ma you must be really proud

WHat colour is your hair now Noteven

Venus you sound very kind to teach people practical skills like cooking when they are struggling

Glad to hear you are finally getting some ME time Mouse

I get my DC's back after work today and then we are having a family BBQ as I have some relatives over from Canada so lookign forward to seeing them although I think they have missed the hound more than me .
I had a few drinks last night so feeling a little rough although looking back I didn't have that much so maybe my tolerance levels are going down. I am out for a meal tomorrow night at one of my favourite restaurants so have fake tanned my legs = am sitting here with streaky legs

Venus you lead a full and active life, huge admiration for you.

Mouse, great to hear you are having a lovely, relaxing time with your friend, enjoy:)

Ma can't even imagine being in a position to consider buying an apartment for one of my daughters, what a different world some people live in

Noteven, best of luck at the hairdressers, not a fan of going to the hairdressers, for some strange reason I always find it more stressful than relaxing

Thurso, how are you getting on with your new book

Zany am sure your children are just as excited about seeing you as they are about seeing the hound . Sounds like you have a lovely evening planned.

HOw are you Obrigada

Hey Zany, am feeling ok today, am trying to keep things in the moment and not project too much, patience is not really my strong point and want my life to change overnight which of course it's not going to do

Out of interest, thurso are your DC and his friends planning on taking a gap year? I read in the paper that a lot less people are doing so this year, iin part to have at least one year before fees increase. Have never understood the gap year thing - not something we did back home, largely for financial reasons! similarly much more usual there to work your way through university.

obrigada I live a full and INACTIVE life . You'll never see me on one of these threads admitting to running [horror], or anything that would get me out of breath and sweaty . I occasionaly go to the pool, but there's certainly no thrashing up and down the lanes, I do the swimming equivalent of a nice stroll.

Know what you mean about wanting changes now Obrigada. I'm no good at 'waiting to see what happens'.

I'm feeling a bit unsure about posting things at the moment as I am sure that my recent XP has been reading my postings again. Can't decide whether to just think 'WTF' and carry on as normal or name change. I posted on here about my EX who lived with me for a couple of years being in touch more and trying to convince me that he had changed and then a few hours later I get a not very pleasant text from recent Xp saying good luck to you both. (Goodness all these XP's make me sound like a serial dater I'm not.) There isn't any other way that he would know apart from sneaking a look on here which he did early on in the relationship, we went downhill from that suprise suprise

legal my dd2 has just had a gap year. She had the qualifications to go to university last year, but she decided that she wanted to wait for a year. It was absoloutely the right thing for her to do. She was quite young age wise, and I know that her cousin had difficulty with being under 18 during her first term, and couldn't get into the student union. She was also pretty lazy (she had the qualifications she needed after 5th year, and she'd had a year at school pissing around doing very little except have a social life). She also had not much idea about money.

dd2's aim was to go travelling, but there was no bank-of-mum-and-dad here [cruel mother], so she worked her socks off as a kitchen porter and a waitress until she had enough money to fund her trip. She travelled till her money ran out, and has since been back at work saving money to go to University in September. She has grown up a lot, has learnt how to budget, and she is much more realistic about the world and its ways.

By contrast though, I met a family a couple of years ago who were fabulously rich. Their dd was about to go on a gap year (funded by ma & pa) which included (apparently ) rescuing african children from starvation, saving the wild apes in a tropical jungle, kayacking up a lost river in the Amazon, trekking with nomad tribes in a wilderness, oh and probably getting lost somewhere up her own backside in the process

Hello wonderful Babes!

I haven't been on here in what seems like ages, but I do read as often as I can and it's lovely to see some old faces (not literally 'old' ) and new faces, making this bus the lovely, supportive place I know it to be

Anyway thought I'd update as things are going well for me right now - that's not to say I haven't had my moments as had a real grim set-back a few months ago where I'd slipped back to drinking at least a bottle and a half of wine (or equivalent of) 4-5 nights a week, then convincing myself having two nights off was enough to give my body a break (!)

I made a 'balance sheet' a few weeks ago and wrote down all the positive things I got from drinking and then wrote down the negatives. It's fair to say one side was much longer than the other and it helped me see my drinking for what it really was, down in black and white like that. I'm still very much taking things ODAAT but this is the first time I've seen the 5+ year hangover through to the end and as a result, I have been able to add more to the list of 'positives' to my balance sheet (such as sleeping well, no paranoia, more energy, less bloating and less wind ).

I couldn't and wouldn't have made it this far without the bus! It's not always easy but I am determined to keep going.

Love to all, Was xxx