Love, you have done all YOU can. Now is the time for you to sit back and for HIM to show you, his DC and the world that HE is prepared to be a great dad, a super H and an all round good egg.
Until he achieves that, you reserve the right to stand well back and give him the space to do whatever he needs to do to. 
This is what I meant about finding the way to be a spectator in your life, it's a great way to observe it all, bemused and detached from the side lines. When you say to yourself, I can do no more, then you can start to gain distance.
The thing with abusers is that they cause so much chaos in their immediate surroundings, muddy the waters so much, you can't see which way is up, so they get to call the shots.
Once you distance yourself a little, you can see the situation for what it is, a chaotic mini-swirl right around HIM, and him ONLY! The rest of the world doesn't live like that!
Stand back and he will continue to spin, while you begin to see more clearly, think more clearly and feel calmer, more collected and able to work out what you need to do, and more importantly what you DON'T need to do.
As soon as you get to the position of spectator, you will start to feel able to relax, knowing that whatever drama he creates is HIS alone. You don't have to be dragged into it.
"Sort yourself out H, then let me know when you are in a fit place to see your DC. Up to you now..... off you go...."