How do you feel about prostitution?

[BillieH]

Hello everyone, I have name changed for this(no sinister reason) but i do post on here from time to time.

Anyway, I would love to know what your thoughts are on prostitution. I don't mean political views and I dont really want to get into a discussion on whether girls are trafficked, pimped, druggies. Just what you think as a whole.

I am talking about girls who willing become escorts or work in massage parlours under the guise of 'masseuses' when really they provide extras.

What do you think of men who see them? Are that losers, sad and lonely, 'sex addicts'or what? Would you think your dp/dh was cheating if he saw a prostitute.

I ask just out of curiosity, I do not think my dp has ever visited a prostitute! Also, apparently 1 in 10 men see prostitutes. Do you agree with this. If this is true what hope do we all have eh?

My take is that i belive some girls use their looks to earn money an 'easy' way. By easy, I mean that they do not have to train for yrs to get a decent paid job, or they do not have to work 9 to 5 in an office when they can earn a wks wages in a day.

I have asked my own dp and he beleives that there is something missing from a relationship if a man sees a prostitute.Obviously its different with a single man. He also thinks that some men have issues sexually with their wives/partners and are inhibited. Therefore, that is why they pay for sex acts that they can't ask for at home. These are exactly my thoughts.Anyone agree or disagree?

I'd like your thoughts or experiences!

Would that not make a lot of sense since us and our profession are being dissected discussed?

Do you have a batphone which flashes when anybody types 'lapdancing' too?

Sabrina, to answer your question, i've been to about 3 or 4 "working flats", not always because of their sex work but other matters (1 WG was regularly a domestic violence victim). We knew where a lot of the brothels were situated, however the majority cause no bother at all.

I just have another question I would like to ask you escorts, do you have clients that you would really rather not have to have sex with ? it's just that I really took exception to the OPs assertion that prostitution is really easy money; personally I can think of nothing worse than having to try and fake enjoyment with someone that I found physically revolting.

MissH, there are some - actually only a tiny, but vociferous minority - who think they should be able to talk about us, passing on their own "myths" about prostitution, and we should just STFU. I've been accused of being a man, a punter, a sockpuppet, a troll... and when it was finally accepted that I am who and what I am, I was told that I should not discuss the truths of my life because I was "glamourising" prostitition.

These were self-described feminists who wished to silence the voices of other women. Just because we disagree with them.

, innit?

BitOfPom Fri 12-Nov-10 22:57:40
I've only just clicked on this after seeing the last poster's name in Active Convos- escortsomething.

ROFL

A few of them always pop up on threads like these, it's getting rather predictable.

I await your contribution on the subject at hand :)

We probably pop up on these threads as fellow Mumsnet members and because it is a subject we care about and know about. escortandmum, OFFS, and a quite few more members here are in daily contact and make an effort to meet in real life. That is what friends do, you know real ones, not Facebook pokers...

PS: I do not pole dance, especially as I have not found one that is structurally reinforced enough...

If it's someone I'd really rather not have sex with, Fibilou, but he was clean, polite and respectful, tbh I'd go through with it and simply not see him again.

I've never found anyone "physically revolting" (the two I walked out on were not) but I'll admit, to my shame, that I found it difficult with one physically disabled chap. I won't describe his condition because that wouldn't be terribly discreet, but I just got on with it.

I am hugely admiring of women who offer their services via TLC, but am not willing or able to do so myself.

Just to lighten the mood, could any of you advise, i am a size 18 and breastfeeding, have rather sizeable credit card debts. Do you think there is a niche market for me

I'm not reading 800-odd posts. I didn't click on it earlier because it doesn't interest me.

What do I think of prostitution? I think it's a shame, for everybody involved.

I need to sign off for the night now ladies but look forward to a constructive, informative conversation in the future.

We are more than happy to answer your questions provided we are afforded with the respect we deserve as fellow women and in most cases, Mothers too.

xx

I just have another question I would like to ask you escorts, do you have clients that you would really rather not have to have sex with ?

Honestly there are people that make you think that the job is the pits and the only thing that keeps you going is the cash, there have been times when I have felt like screaming get off me.

But we all have bad days at the office or orifice in our case, I can honestly hand on heart say that more often than not no matter what looks/shape/age I can find something endearing about them, and people find hard to believe but something that will turn me on.

Fibilou, there is a market for everything.

Fibilou Fri 12-Nov-10 23:12:23
Just to lighten the mood, could any of you advise, i am a size 18 and breastfeeding, have rather sizeable credit card debts. Do you think there is a niche market for me

There is a market for us all :)

xx night xx

Fibilou I appreciate your genuine questions. Personally, I vet clients and really do weed out a lot of guys before ever letting them into my work space. By that stage I have often built up a rapport and find it easy to connect and find something attractive about them. So far I have not refused service in 3+ years when a client has actually arrived but I turn down approx 40% of booking requests at the initial phone or email contact stage. I am not being complacent but this careful approach has so far meant I have never had a dangerous or unpleasant encounter.

As for attraction, I am particularly drawn to very funny people and find that a huge turn on. As a very young teenager I fancied Marty Feldman and was devastated when I realised he had died as I had pictured him as my future beau.

Fibilou, if you promise not be be all revolted about it, yes, there is indeed such a niche market. Don't look if you're just going to be horrified.

BBWs (Big Beautiful Women) are very popular anyway. It really isn't all about lithe youngsters, exploited through their own naivety. All shapes, sizes, colours etc of women will have their fans.

Sabrina, what do you find that the majority of your clients come to you for ? Is it purely sex or more company ?
I have always thought of escorts as providing dinner + extras, how would your "standard" date pan out ?

Hmm mainly sex, but I also do a lot of massage and relief only appointments, I don't market myself for dinner dates or overnighters as I have a partner and we have agreed that is something I would not do.
I do offer shorter appointments which some ladies are not into, as they are more into the 'date' side of it and that is what their clients seek.
I would say a mix of 1/2 - 3 hour appointments. Much of it is not about the sex but the intimacy, sex is surprisingly a very small part of the bookings on a whole.
I do not work like I used to where I would see 6/7 gents a day, I am too old for that now :P
I am happy at the pace that I go and the body seems to be holding up for now.

Well OFFS, I'd certainly be in a select group from that page !!

What does your partner make of it sabrina ?
I'm guessing "relief only" would be a hand or blowjob ?

I would also welcome your opinions on the legal situation, if you had to pay tax etc on your earnings but in return be treated as a profession in the same way as (I believe) sex workers are in the Netherlands, would you support this ? Do you think that legalising it would help ?
I've never been convinced that it would, in the same way that if hard drugs were legalised, dealers would still exist as they would be selling "black market" drugs such as knock offs or stolen ones. I imagine that sex work would be similar

sorry, didn't finish that sentence - I mean help keep prostitutes safer, or is it simply the nature of the work that makes it risky, not the legal status ?

i just don't understand why women would fight for mens right to have sex when and where it suits them.

Why would you argue in favour of men's power over women

WHy not focus your energies on eliminating the feminization of poverty so that men no longer have the power to pay women for their bodies

(in other words, nobody vote for the Tories next time round )

Relief is a hand job.
I was doing the job when I met him, and was naughty I kept it from him, while looking for an exit when things started getting serious, he is the suspicious type and snapped me out, a lot of tears and talking and he said he was fine with it and understood, two years down the line it was not ok and he was not fine, he wanted to be, but on occasion it ate at him something terrible.
I gave it up, funny enough as he started to really be ok with it, only I did not trust this to be the truth.
I come and go in the industry every now and then anyway, I lost my job and his contract work was getting worse so we decided to go back as an escorting couple, while he was there and saw what it was all about it truly did change his mind about it.
Several breaks in and out the business we have been together 7.5 years, he has his regular job, I have my escorting alongside a new venture and things are going along really really well. x

I mean, there is X amount of men out there with the spare cash to pay for another human beings' body.

And there are X amount of women out there who, for them, selling their body is the rational economic option in the face of all other options (work that fits around childcare, shitty minimum wage jobs etc)

DOes any of the women here think it's a coincidence that society has been structured in a way that means prostitution is a good option for women because of their economic weakness in society?

Fibilou we are expected to pay our taxes and most of us do. Working as an independent sex worker is perfectly legal. Personally, I have never had any problem customer. However, I know other ladies have contacted the police over the conduct of a client and received a courteous and prompt response. They treated a colleague of mine with respect and a lot of sensitivity, acknowledging she was doing nothing illegal and deserved to be protected and dealt with in a polite manner just like any other person. I would not hesitate to call the police if the need ever arose. I consider and hihgly rspect them as a vital support.