WWIFN - I know you think that about my attitudes to women but honestly, I don't think it's true. My mother has been completely horrible to me at times. Throughout my teenage years, she regularly forgot my birthday, started arguments/feuds with me about stupid things, forgot what A levels/degree I was doing, made no attempt to contact me for weeks on end when I was at university, told me I was too chubby, told me I was too thin, told me it was a massive mistake to dump my first boyfriend because no one would ever want me etc. etc. She is generally regarded as a PITA by the rest of her family (mostly women, btw) and regularly screwed up Christmas for everyone by 'not being bothered' to turn up for the sake of her elderly parents, or turning up but being horrible to people. She is a bit better now, but still has her moments.
My father, on the other hand, was the one I lived with after the divorce. He can be very passive/unnoticing but is never actively unkind. He remembers my birthday, is interested in my education/career etc. He is fairly socially incompetent, after a childhood of distant parents and boarding schools, and can be quite selfish. But there's certainly not so much to criticise with him as with my mother. Is that so hard to believe?
Regarding exDP's ex, I didn't accept his description of her entirely at face value - I realise that there was bound to be a bit of bias. But she is fundamentally a domestic-minded sort of person, and still babies their children quite a lot. There's no harm in this, of course, but I could sort of see his point.
If I'm completely honest, the main reasons for breaking up with DP were the fact that I didn't believe he could sustain interest in me longterm if I didn't remain perfect, and also I was worried that his age might cause problems with our potential baby - either the conceiving of it or chromosomal stuff. I wouldn't want to be pregnant straight away, so that would just add to his age.
I did tell my two best friends, properly, the first time the playfighting upset me. What had happened was, I was lying on the bed (sulking about something) and DP came and lifted up my feet and was kissing them and making a fuss, trying to take me out of myself. Then he folded my legs back so that my thighs were pressing against my chest and leant on my shins so that I couldn't breathe. I was fighting to get out but couldn't and shouting, and he did let me go about 5 seconds too late. I was really cross and upset but he didn't see the problem. Then we went to dinner and he was cross because I wanted a G&T instead of wine, so ordered a bottle of wine anyway and then got irritated that I wouldn't drink all of mine 
. The next morning he went out and I rang my two best friends and told them both what had happened because I was still annoyed and wanted someone to take me seriously. Both of them were of the 'Men are so annoying, they don't know their own strength' school of thought. Both their boyfriends had done similar, and we talked about how difficult it was to get them to listen 
. So they weren't worried by it. Both their bfs are much younger than mine, and we are all quite young so I suppose we don't know about red flags yet, but I am sure they would have thought I was a bit mad if I'd said I was breaking up with him over it. Again with the biting, a few months later, they understood why I was cross but no one suggested it was a really bad thing or dangerous.