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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

bum play

43 replies

Dominique07 · 07/09/2010 11:45

Ever met men who want bum play?

Feel suddenly shy about this!

I love sex, but never felt the need to experiment too much... And now I've met someone who is into handcuffs and bum play. Blush

Any advice about how to approach this?

OP posts:
weegiemum · 07/09/2010 11:46

It's not Friday night

Coolfonz · 07/09/2010 11:46

This could be a biggie.

Are you a man? Journalist?

VirginOnTheRidiculous · 07/09/2010 11:46

Is it Friday?

Am I losing days again?

Philosykos · 07/09/2010 11:46

In my (not vast admittedly), experience, if he's bringing it up now - eg before you have had sex (I think?) - he will be rubbish at 'vanilla' sex.

TotorosOcarina · 07/09/2010 11:47

Christ woman, its lunchtime !!

Coolfonz · 07/09/2010 11:47

Six replies in 30 seconds!

Two from me! Blush

Original poster
Dominique07 · 07/09/2010 11:48

Oh sorry... This is a Friday night topic, okay. Grin

OP posts:
ChickensHaveNoEyebrows · 07/09/2010 11:50

Define 'bum play'

GypsyMoth · 07/09/2010 11:52

once those handcuffs are on you will lose any control!! approach with caution....

lostFeelings · 07/09/2010 11:54

is he going to wear those handcuffs?

Original poster
Dominique07 · 07/09/2010 11:59

I don't know! I was looking for answers from ladies and men with experience.

OP posts:
venusandmars · 07/09/2010 12:17

My (limited) experience is the same as philosykos - rubbish at vanilla sex. And I wasn't much into the bumstuff. Relationship didn't last long.

bridgetjonesislovely · 07/09/2010 12:17

Have a looky for the thread called bum sex and wind and as it's Tuesday that is all i am saying

Coolfonz · 07/09/2010 12:18

Like, what has he said? Assuming you are not a man/journalist.

emmyloulou · 07/09/2010 12:21

If you are not a man, then why would you bother? Someone who screams out so early on they want to swing from the chandeliers tends to be absolute shite at real sex.

All this stuff should come a bit later when some trust etc is there IMO.

CheerfulV · 07/09/2010 12:29

watches with considerable interest Grin

CheerfulV · 07/09/2010 12:30

Oh shit, I forgot asterisks tend to do that on mn. Now I look like I'm shouting. Hmm... Wink

merrywidow · 07/09/2010 18:46

Whats 'Vanilla' Sex ?

MooMooFarm · 07/09/2010 20:40

merrywidow just what I was wondering! Am thinking probably 'standard hole' sex, in which case bum sex must be 'chocolate' flavour?

EleFunTess · 07/09/2010 20:43

I don't have my Friday night props

So couldn't possibly reply to this thread.

Alouiseg · 07/09/2010 20:46

Your bum or his?

whomovedmychocolate · 07/09/2010 20:48

I think it's very mean to homeless people to bother them for sex TBH Grin

Alouiseg · 07/09/2010 20:49

Lol!

robbie09 · 08/09/2010 00:18

Your bum or his? Me & my partner experiment alot & we both enjoy 'bumplay' to a certain exstent, but theen weve been together aa few yeaars

Coolfonz · 08/09/2010 10:40

Are you sure he doesn't want to stage a rather poorly-executed stage event while wearing handcuffs? Hamelet in chains?