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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Brave Battling Babes - Booze No More!!

978 replies

Mouseface · 30/07/2010 23:47

Well, thanks to the refreshingly honest and inspirational JesusWhatNext - this is the third thread, for the battle to beat the booze for all of those who are on the path to do so.

Some are sober, some are trying to be and some are still drinking.

I'm Mouse, I'm new to this and I'm scared. So, come and join the journey.

OP posts:
TrinityRhino · 02/08/2010 13:12

I want to have a beer

I want to do what the hell I want

I know I know

I dont want to really

except I do

MoominMags · 02/08/2010 13:14

Are you close to picking up trinity or just feeling generally pissed off about the whole thing? I was feeling the same on Sat night. I really, really wanted to have a drink. And I was so angry that the rest of the world (so it felt) was out, having a drink and not thinking anything more about it.

MoominMags · 02/08/2010 13:15

But I am so pleased that I didn't.

ChristianaTheSeventh · 02/08/2010 13:20

Hey Trinity, you know that feeling will dissipate, you won't be feeling like that all day. Take it minute by minute, hour by hour.

I have started to get a bit shaky with interview nerves. My hands are all wobbly.

MIFLAW · 02/08/2010 13:21

Trinity?

Do you really want a beer?

Or do you want lots of beers?

If you want a beer, have a beer - as long as you have worked out the full cost.

For example - are you likely to stop after one? Or two? Or five? Or five plus wine?

Who will be taking care of your other responsibilities while you have the beer (or whatever you have)?

How many minutes/hours/days will it be before you can happily put the drink down again?

Where are you likely to end up as a direct result of this drink?

If, after carrying out these calculations, you are still sure you want a drink, I will buy it for you myself.

I can't say fairer than that.

MoominMags · 02/08/2010 13:23

christi - deep breaths. At least you are feeling wobbly from nerves and not having the shakes!!

trinity - come and tell us how you are feeling. We're here.

TrinityRhino · 02/08/2010 13:26

thankyou miflaw

thankyou everyone

I'm not close to picking up

I just feel its unfair that I cant sometimes

I'm happier sober

ChristianaTheSeventh · 02/08/2010 13:28

yes, in fact I had proper DTs about a month ago for the first time and I was utterly shocked by them. I realised that my drinking wasn't funny any more.

I wish I was a chilled out person. Not sure if it's really helpful me being here on my own.

MIFLAW · 02/08/2010 13:37

Trinity

If life was fair, I'd be dead.

MoominMags · 02/08/2010 13:37

The DTs are not pleasant. I did not get them routinely but have had them a few times and it was HORRIBLE.

I am so glad you feel happier when sober trinity. So do I. I understand feeling pissed off with the unfairness though. (Whenever I complained of things being unfair when I was a child my dad would say, 'Life's not fair Moomin.' Which I hated - so I am not sure why I am saying it now!)

MoominMags · 02/08/2010 13:38

christi - why do you feel it's not helpful for you to be on your own?

Original poster
Mouseface · 02/08/2010 13:40

MIFLAW

I'm glad life's not fair then.

OP posts:
MIFLAW · 02/08/2010 13:41

Sorry if i'm being horrible btw - I really don't mean it that way.

But like I say - there is at least one occaision in my drinking when I can honestly say that, had i ended up stabbed to death, no one could really say I was unlucky - and several others where it could have gone either way (falling asleep with a lit cigarette, smashing my head open on various pavements, ending the evening in very dodgy company ...)

But I'm very lucky, because life ISN'T fair and I got away with all of them.

But, that being the case, it would be a bit rich for me to complain now about the fairness of life.

I speak, as ever, only for myself.

ChristianaTheSeventh · 02/08/2010 13:42

I just worry on my own. About the interview. I seem to be all shaky. I need to take my mind off it. I have done lots of work and I don't seem to be able to access the information and answers I have prepared. Maybe I should go for a cycle or something to buy the paper. With DH being made redundnat this job is perfect, ideal, wellpaid, challenging, intersting, good location, very prestigious company... So just piling the pressure on myself... Really not helpful is it.

At least I know that drinking would make it worse, I guess I hoped that nine days without booze would have helped me get more relaxed and in control of myself.

MIFLAW · 02/08/2010 13:49

"At least I know that drinking would make it worse, I guess I hoped that nine days without booze would have helped me get more relaxed and in control of myself."

Re-read the first bit of your post - you ARE more relaxed and in control of yourself. You've prepared - CONTROL.

You're not drunk - CONTROL.

You're thinking logically - RELAXED.

Everyone gets nervous before an interview, especially when the stakes are high.

Do something else for a few minutes then come back to it.

TBH you're probably so well prepared that even if you can't open the documents you'll find you remember it all when you sit down.

Bear in mind, too, that intwerviews cost money - if they've invited you to interview it is because they would like to give you the job. Just stay calm and let them know why that would be a good idea.

The only thing you could do wrong at this juncture would be to drink, and you're not going to do that, are you?

Good luck.

S

MoominMags · 02/08/2010 13:50

christi - you would definitely feel worse if you had been drinking over the past 9 days. Get out on the bike, get some fresh air and the paper and relax for a couple of hours. Then maybe return to it later. You can only do your best - which I am sure you will do. Try to take the pressure off yourself. Any relaxing suggestions for christi from anyone out there??

MIFLAW · 02/08/2010 14:03

Mouse

So am I!

GlassInHand · 02/08/2010 14:10

Is it dreadful of me to ask what everyone was drinking daily? I was opening a beer / g and t earlier and earlier each day and never stopping at one. And always finishing with a bottle of wine. Last week I realised that I was starting at 4 pm and finishing up after 11, everyday

ChristianaTheSeventh · 02/08/2010 14:11

THanks MIFLAW and Mooomin. I'm going to go to Tesco for the paper now, and I'm thinking about booking in for a massage. Seems very extravagant but I'm savin glots of money not drinking!

venusandmars · 02/08/2010 14:11

Christi, from what you've posted before it sounds as though you enjoy exercise (you mad, mad woman . Why not go for a run, tire yourself out, have a nice relaxing bath, listen to some music. Make a picture.

Make a picture? yes, get some magazines and cut out all the pictures of things that you can do now that you are sober: nice places to go, nice things to eat, healthy skin. Add in the things that you can do once you get a great job: a holiday perhaps, some plants for your garden, new shoes....

Cutting and sticking and being creative are terribly therapeutic and relaxing.

ChristianaTheSeventh · 02/08/2010 14:20

Making a picture sounds great. Will do!

MoominMags · 02/08/2010 14:23

glass - I have no problem with you asking me that at all. However I don't really have an answer. My drinking pattern was all over the place! Sometimes I would have 2 large glasses of wine at lunch and then another bottle (and the rest) after work. Sometimes I would have nothing. On some occasions I would have a few drinks after work. Sometimes I would be so hungover from the night before I would start drinking as early as I could. (Either at the weekend or I would call in 'sick' to work.) I always wanted 'more'. I tended to drink wine or vodka. No idea if that is useful at all!!

venusandmars · 02/08/2010 14:25

glass In reply to your question, I'd like to quote MIFLAW here:

"absolutely fucking shit-loads"

It's his 'working definition' of how many units were being consumed.

MoominMags · 02/08/2010 14:26

The times when I only had a few drinks were painful as I just wanted more and more. I frequently passed out - but not always. I heard something in a meeting the other week which really hit me: "I didn't always get in trouble when I drank but whenever I was in trouble it was always because of drink." (Or words to that effect.)

MoominMags · 02/08/2010 14:28

Further to what venus said: it's not necessarily how much or what you drink, it's how you drink it, how it makes you feel...