Old Bags No More - The Brave Babes & the Battle with the Booze

[MoominMags]

Well, here we go ladies (and MIFLAW)! The new thread to follow on from JWN's 'me and alcohol have ruined my family'. I hope no one minds that I decided to go with 'brave'? I just think that it describes us!

As a quick recap, I am 33 and on day 22 of sobriety (on this occasion!)

Good morning! Day 18!!! Happy birthday venus for later in the week, I hope that you find something wonderful to do.

I read 'til my eyes ached last night, haven't done that in years, and although I had a fitfull night, it was so lovely waking and thinking 'oh crap, I must give up' then realising I hadn't had a drink, and it was just a simple common or garden broken night!

Yeas, moving to where dh has been working. Two removal companies coming today, so preparing for a heart attacvk when they tell me how much it's all going to cost...

thinking about curryeater last night; if you're there curry, it'ds be good to hear from you...

Have a lovely week everybody!

morning! wow algee! day 18 already, the days are racking up so quickly arent they!
i dont know if you have used movers before, but when we moved here they were worth their weight in gold - it all went tits-up while our home was actually in the van!(funny thing was, the couple who screwed us were then screwed in turn the 'new' buyers pulled out and the agent then spent weeks making daft offers to us! karma! ) thank god they had storage facillities! we were 'homeless' for 6 weeks till we found this place!

i would love to hear from curry aswell, dosent matter if you have picked up, just like to know that you are ok!

see you later xx

Morning all!

Sounds like we have all had lovely weekends! I went to the wedding reception on Friday and was not tempted in the slightest by booze. Did not even get a pang! Today is day 33 (Saturday was one month so I am looking forward to getting my medallion thingy at the meeting tonight!) Got all my housework done, did lots of reading and just enjoyed being sober and not hungover!

There are too many things to comment on over the weekend (need to keep notes like algee!) but it was lovely to catch up with you all when I got in this morning. gloup - how are things for you now?

It's good to be back girls!

JWN, what a bunch of arses! nICE TO ACTUALLY GET TO SEE KARMA IN ACTION THOUGH, HUH...oops sorry. We're putting everything in to storage closer to the new place, it is currently being 'refurbished' read 'having seven bells knocked out of it' and for the first few months we'll be setting up home in one of the bedrooms. Cosy!

Never used movers before, just us and a luton van last time, but no way I'm attempting a 250 mile move like that, even if dh still thinks we could do it!

Right, see you all later

Hi algee - cross posted there! Well done on day 18 by the way!!

morning moomin!

"I didn't want to draw attention, amongst a lot of stangers"

Simultaneously the happiest and saddest moment in my life was when I realised that, by and large, no one gives a fuck what I do or even notices unless I point it out to them!

But glad it worked for you and that you came through unscathed.

Sorry JWN I did not congratulate you on 8 weeks - bloody well done!!

Hi guys

Sorry I haven't been onfor a while, switched phone providers and have had the usual nightmare trying to get broadban connected.

It has been sorted at the right time though,I'm having a serious wobble. Haven't taken my antabuse since I went to clinc last eek and I know that means tomorrow I could drink with no reaction. For some strange reason I needed to know I could control it myself but it is very very risky. I keep looking at the bottle of plls and willing myself to take one but can't. What to do, I'm such a fool.

This seems even more foolish given the terible shock I had last week. A very dear school riend wh I had lost ouch with passed away age 27 frm liver failure. She had been additedto slvents, then two year ago switched to alcohol. She was very very poorly. It is o sadhat it happened so fast. She leaves her 5 yar old son in the care of her ex usband. The serice was very samall and very sad. Her grandad used to take us swimming whn I was small an e had a long chat at the wake where he mad me romise I would carry on sober, that I could learn something fr her and in a bittersweet way something good could come from tragedy.

I feel bloody selfish for even messing around like this. I'm just having a rough time of it at the moment. We haven't heard a thing from social services and my parens feel I really should be 'rewarded' with time with the children, to have them over night or something ut are cautious to go ahead without their ageement. It feels like life is out of my hands right now and I am so bloody lonely. People have stopped inviting me out, callin me, and I know why. I know who is to blame and that makes it even harder.Oh apart from the eople who don't care about me who ould happily come over wih a bottle for the fun of it, the people I don't want to be seeing.

Sorry for the downer again.
Off to read the many posts on here now, hope all are well.

chinkof please be careful. I amso sorry about your friend, what an awful shock; it's one thing knowing how it could end hypothetically, another entirely knowing through experience. Please be kind to yourself and don't pick up.

I am so glad at least taht your parents are so supportive of you that must be a great comfort, though of course what would be even better would be movement forward...afraid I can't offer any words of wisdom, but you must know that for what it's worth there are loads of us out here, the 'computer fairies' willing you on. For me that has been invaluable, and I will always ber grateful for this, my first forray in to the world of chatting with stangers online. You are right about the 'friends' who would see the bottom of some bottles with you...

Please keep posting.
with love

"Haven't taken my antabuse since I went to clinc last eek and I know that means tomorrow I could drink with no reaction. For some strange reason I needed to know I could control it myself but it is very very risky."

The only possible reason for "needing" to know this is because you want to drink again.

Stop fucking about and find a solution to your alcohol problem that is not purely chemical. This is the main flaw of antabuse (and kudzu, and any other "remedy") - not that it doesn't work but that, if you want to get round it, you stop taking it.

Alcoholism is a mental illness. Pills and potions alone will not fix it.

oh chink, my love!!!
you arn't selfish, just a bit lost and lonely right now!, you sound so very sad!

i cant make the call for you on whether you should take the antabuse, but it does sound like you need a little help - perhaps you should go and see your doc today and chat things through - i think if i were in your position i would also be pushing social services, i think you need to feel more in control of your own life and destiny - i am also sure that you dont need people who would encourge you to drink, they are not friends! YOU ARE DOING SO WELL!! PLEASE DONT WRECK IT NOW!!!

i expect moomin will be about in a bit - she always have a good bit of advice, as does miflaw - you are not alone darling! your computer faries are rooting for you and your children all the way!

x-posted - you lot are bloody awesome!!!

Hi all,

chinkof, some of the others have already posted and I hope you have found it useful. Please remember that no matter how shit things feel now (and you are going through a really rough time) they will feel a million times worse if you pick up. Please go and see your doctor. The best piece of advice I could give you at this point is to go to an AA meeting. Or at least call the helpline. It's manned (or woman-ed!) by people just like us. I know that you are dubious about AA but please, please think about giving it a go. The only people that can understand how you are feeling now are other alkies. I am really not one for pushing AA on others but you are in a very dangerous place. Act now!

Phew, lecture over. We love you chinkof and we want you to get better x x

chinkof are you about?

Chinkof - you must be feeling so many things - hold tight!

Sorry if you have been worried about me, and thanks for asking. I have been away on holiday. I didn't get around to signing off before I went, it was all so hectic. It's nice to see you all asking about me - thank you.

Nice to meet you, new people!

Lovely to see some wobbles so well supported.

I did drink on holiday. Nothing awful happened, no big fights or anything, but it would have been better without. I have more musings on this but can't talk really at work.
So: Day 1 here.

Have a good day, everyone.

hi curry - nice to have you back! hope you had a good holiday?

at work aswell, so maybe see you later?

curry - lovely to have you back. Hope you're OK being back at work - always hate the return to work myself!

Glad you're OK and hope to hear more from you soon.

Did you get to your lunchtime meeting today JWN?

no moomin - i went to the pub for a working lunch - i used to be a huge advocate of this method of working - it just really annoyed me today, i had so much i wanted to get through and everyone else was drinking! grr. - i have to keep reminding myself not to be a sanctimonious old bag!

btw - I DID NOT DRINK!

i will be going to meeting tommorrow, i ahve missed it the last few days - i like the 'grounding' it gives me!

Ah yes, the working lunch in the pub! Well done for not drinking - although it does not sound like it was a temptation in any way, great isn't it??!

I am off to a meeting tonight, I also like the 'gounding' - know exactly what you mean.

Wonder how the wasindies are doing? I bet they are exhausted! How's everyone else that has been quiet so far today??

Hello, and lovely to see curry back.

Chink of, please just focus on what is important. Staying sober, and getting yourself in the right place to look after your dcs.

We are going to friends for dinner tonight. I am driving and very happy to do so. A nice dinner and lots of happy people becaus I'm the driver.

JWN - well done for putting up with the 'working' lunch. I do wonder how many times others were pee'd off with me for paying more attention to getting the next bottle of wine than to the next item of the agenda.

Hi moomin, algee and MIFLAW (although will excuse MIFLAW from being a computer fairy )

Hello everyone,

venus you made me laugh about MIFLAW being a computer fairy (or being excused!)

It's almost sign off time for me now. Hope that everyone has a good evening. Feeling very tired and rather grumpy at the moment. No urge to drink so that's good! I am sure that I will feel much better once I get to my meeting tonight. (And get my shiny medallion, ha ha!)

Keep safe everyone. chinkof - please keep posting. No one will judge you if anything happens, we know how hard it is and the fact that you have posted on here about how you are feeling is a good thing. Keep talking to us.

algee, JWN, venus, curry, MIFLAW, wasindie, kate, wrinkly, gloup and ido: catch up with you tomorrow! (As always, apologies to anyone I have forgotten!)

Hi all,

sounds like it's been a busy weekend for everyone.
I had a lovely weekend, NO ALCOHOL!! Today is day 7 for me so by tomorrow morning I can say I've not drunk for a week yippee!!
Must tell you about a conversation from last night:-
DH was engrossed in Top Gear, DS was half watching it. I was reading & thinking I could do with a drink, so I said to whoever might listen " I really want a drink". DS replies "why don't you go to the off-licence?" (He is 13 & I have always avoided drinking too much until he's gone to bed).
So I say " No - thtat's not what you're meant to say to me" ,so DS raises his voice to a shout and says "Dad - go to
the off-licence for mum!"

Needless to say, he didn't (mind you when he's watching Top Gear he wouldn't leave his seat if the house was burning down!)

Happy anniversary Wrink!

im sober but up the wall....

went to docs, got anti d's...
cant take them as am bf.

Doc recommends seeing HV to see about getting some help as ive got no one, and feel like im at the end of my tether.

DS is playing up after spending time with his dad.

Had very little sleep, like, an hour here and there...

AGGGHHH

Hi Kate,
Hang on in there - wish I had some practical advice, how do you feel about seeing the HV? (this is Health Visitor?,I'm not very good at these acronyms!)

We computer fairies are here for you, but I know that's not the same as having someone physically there. Just get through today and don't even think about tomorrow.