Archers thread #161: Kenton seems to be getting better, but the storylines aren’t. Discuss The Archers here.

[Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g]

All views on The Archers welcome here! New blood welcomed, and of course we are always delighted to welcome back former or occasional listeners/posters. We don't all agree on all points, although we do mostly try to be civil about it. Most of us are posting tongue in cheek a lot of the time, so don't worry about revealing that you think it's great that Shula's ministering to the heathen of the North-East, or other unusual views.

Spoilers: not on this thread, please! We don't wait for the omnibus to discuss the weeknight episodes, but we do try our best to avoid cross-contamination from www.mumsnet.com/talk/radio_addicts/4636789-the-archers-spoilers-thread-7-cant-wait-for-702pm-join-us-here, www.mumsnet.com/talk/radio_addicts/4636789-the-archers-spoilers-thread-7-cant-wait-for-702pm-join-us-here,]] where spoilers are positively welcomed!

For newer listeners, lurkers or those who just have no idea what we're talking about, @DadDadDad has created this useful thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/radio_addicts/3557323-For-Archers-fans-a-guide-to-acronyms-on-the-long-running-discussion-threads-and-any-other-meta-thread-questions-you-may-have www.mumsnet.com/Talk/radio_addicts/3557323-For-Archers-fans-a-guide-to-acronyms-on-the-long-running-discussion-threads-and-any-other-meta-thread-questions-you-may-have]] - BOOP point for him! (See thread for explanation.)

Well, here we are. I was strongly tempted to go for the dog's dinner, dog/human bullies etc suggestions for the title, but Mere asked if we could not have anything graphic in the thread title, so I've held back. In a couple of weeks when this thead is nearing its end the attack may all be a distant memory, anyway.

Goodness knows what's in store for us now. Kenton seems likely to have PTSD, not surprisingly. Surely we must soon find out why HARRY talks so. Unconvincingly. Alice! Hello. CHRIS. CHRIS. etc, and also whether he is (as many of us suspect) addicted to opiates and/or up to no good. Too much to hope why nobody in Ambridge horsey circles had ever heard of him until recent weeks.

Over to you!

11 o'clock is no use to us for live listening on a Sunday - we are out at church! My late Mum would be spinning in her grave at missing the omnibus boo.

Can I just mention in passing that chocolate and almond croissants are absolutely wonderful. I don't see them that often.

Poor Paul. I even find myself feeling sorry for John. He's retired, isn't he? Hence being able to spend an extended period in St Lucia with his dying mother. It's not a great time for Denise to kick him in the teeth by announcing that their marriage is over and they'll need to sell the house and start again. Denise is deluded if she thinks Paul isn't going to be very, very hurt.

If the marriage has been on its last legs for years John might be expecting or even hoping for it to end. I think he retired just before lockdown and remember Denise complaining that he was out cycling all the time and didn’t seem interested in spending time with her. A few people speculated he was having an affair.

All that said, A&D canoodling in the cupboard within earshot of Paul is awful. I wish Jakob was around to put a stop to it all.

Denise should tell him it’s over on the phone and then at least he can stay out in St Lucia and spend some time with his mum before her demise. There would be no rush for him to come back and he could start coming up with a plan for the future. It’s never a good time to end a marriage but it would be far worse if she waited until the mother had died and he was bereaved.

Having said that, it would still be quite insensitive to then immediately announce her new relationship with Ali-stare. I fear there is more snogging in the stock cupboard to come…

11.00 suits me. We have a leisurely breakfast on Sunday and by the time I’m pottering around listening to the radio we’re on to Desert Island Discs

Denise needs to tell John asap. The nastiest thing about your partner being unfaithful is having to re-evaluate everything that’s happened over the last few months. That day when they were so adamant you should go out and enjoy yourself. That day you decided not to go out and they weren’t as delighted as you expected. The longer Denise delays, the more John has to reevaluate.

Same applies to Paul. He already has to re-evaluate the medicine cupboard. Unless he’s already worked it out.

Not to mention “did Mum send me to St Lucia to clear the ground for her and Alistair? And was that why she told me I should have stayed longer?”

But... Church starts at eleven and the omnibus doesn't end until eleven fifteen, so it's already no use.

All that said, A&D canoodling in the cupboard within earshot of Paul is awful. I wish Jakob was around to put a stop to it all.
Hear, hear.

Following a reorganisation/consolidation, in the face of falling congregations, my Mum's church now has Sunday services starting at 11.30 am when they're at her local church. If she were to be an Archers listener, and if she could move a lot more quickly than she actually can these days, she could just about fit in listening to the omnibus at its current time. 11-12.15 would be no good to her, but even Mum is willing to contemplate trying to catch up with things on her ipad if need be. (All academic, and not Academic Archers either, because she listened regularly in the 1950s and then sporadically - i.e. if it was on when she was in the kitchen, not otherwise.)

Could we incorporate something about the cafe cow hides in the new title perhaps? Harrison on a hiding to nothing... 🤭🙈

Something about Alastair being an f’ing idiot?

How old is Alastair?

I'm surprised Jakob didn’t mention Paul

why is Martha having her bday party with a bunch of oldies! I hope she gets a soft play or church hall bash with her little friends too

brian speaking sense again

Just me or is the woman playing Denise a terrible radio actress? Every word just sounds like she's reading off a script (even though she is!)
Can't bear to listen to the scenes she's in as it's so stilted

Hiding in the medicine cupboard? Nowhere to hide?

@Bringmesunshine123 , it's just you.

I agree sunshine

I think he's in his 60s, the way he's moaning to his dad is like he's 15, the man needs to pull himself together and behave with some dignity.

I know this isn’t right but if you have a senior vet nearing retirement age wouldn’t you query why they suddenly want a new challenge? Not surprised Jakob pulled him up on that pdq

To me she sounds like someone who possibly has quite a strong accent but has changed her voice for this part, and in order to do that is enunciating every syllable, so it comes across as very stilted delivery.
Or she's just terrible on radio!

How many more people is Alistair going to tell about his affair? I can't believe he's so open about it.

Shula would be so embarrassed if she could hear AlI-stare. Is this usual behaviour for a man of his age? And I think even he would know that a ‘fancy’ restaurant on a Friday night at this early stage of their ‘relationship’ would be a misstep.

So there will Archers broadcast seven days a week, albeit not all original episodes!

But how very dare they change anything, frankly - we still haven't recovered from those dreadful beginning of lockdown months?! And then the possibly more dreadful monologues!

Alistair has form for cringiness in affairs of the heart (‘so fresh…’) but this is all just ridiculous. I agree that Jim would not be cheering him on unless Denise was actually single. He irritates the hell out of me, but poor Paul. I think his ‘usually perceptive but oblivious when it comes to his parents’ is quite realistic.

It all just feels so contrived. I actually quite like the actress who plays Denise, but the script is terrible. Will they or won't they? Who actually cares? Any chemistry that might have existed between them has been written out in the careful delineation of Denise's domestic arrangements. I find it impossible to believe Alistair is really thinking of leaving the practice considering he practically lives on the premises and most of his clients are family and friends. I think their affair lacks tension dramatically because we don't know both parties - I'm thinking of Ruth and Sam the cowman, Roy and Elizabeth, Brian and anyone. Paul is potentially collateral damage, but he's only recently started talking about his dad.

I find it impossible to believe Alistair is really thinking of leaving the practice considering he practically lives on the premises and most of his clients are family and friends.

And it started as his private practice before Lovell James were involved. He makes it sound like any other branch would be the same, but the history would be entirely different.