Archers thread #160: Ram a lamb a ding dong! To rate the mass wisteria in Ambridge, tap the feedback tablet here.

[Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g]

Thank you, @PseudoBadger, for kicking off this long, long series of Archers threads.

All views on The Archers welcome here! New blood welcomed, and of course we are always delighted to welcome back former or occasional listeners/posters. We don't all agree on all points, although we do mostly try to be civil about it. Most of us are posting tongue in cheek a lot of the time, so don't worry about revealing that you'd have given a home to Hilda the Hellcat, or other unusual views.

Spoilers: not on this thread, please! We don't wait for the omnibus to discuss the weeknight episodes, but we do try our best to avoid cross-contamination from www.mumsnet.com/talk/radio_addicts/4636789-the-archers-spoilers-thread-7-cant-wait-for-702pm-join-us-here, where spoilers are positively welcomed!

For newer listeners, lurkers or those who just have no idea what we're talking about, @DadDadDad has created this useful thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/radio_addicts/3557323-For-Archers-fans-a-guide-to-acronyms-on-the-long-running-discussion-threads-and-any-other-meta-thread-questions-you-may-have - BOOP point for him! (See thread for explanation.)

Thanks to @MerryChristmasToYou, @OverArmour and @LillianGish for the thread title ideas.

This week is a bit better than last week, but the Brad/Adil/Lily stuff is very odd. Coming up to the anniversary of Jennifer's death (22nd January last year). We need a new matriarch - could that be Natasha? I find her quite an interesting character. Sometimes she's awful and then she has moments as last night where she utterly redeems herself.

Over to you!

It’s just utter nonsense - they are literally making it up as they go along. Why? If Kenton had to attacked by a dog why couldn’t they be just dog dealers using the car park? The gig in Wolverhampton 30 years ago is almost comedic it’s so far fetched. I cannot imagine any situation in which a group of SW would sit round discussing possible dramatic plot twists and come up with this. How did Vince - within moments of arriving at the hospital and having not been seen or heard of in Ambridge for months - instantly pick up that Jolene was hiding something? It must be a matter of record what Jolene was doing in 1994 (if they still bothered to employ an archivist). This rewriting of history and now recasting Vince as somehow having contacts in the underworld- just because he has a regional accent is intolerable.

The eyepatch and parrot are quite distinctive, I suppose.

Was Jolene still a silent character in 1994? But yes the rest of the story is nonsensical. So I'm hoping that's deliberate and a better one will emerge.

😂😱

🤣🤣🤣

😂

Oh that tickled me.

What a pile of tripe, none of that made sense. Apparently Keri Davies has written next week’s episodes, let’s see if his usual magic works on this pig’s ear 🤨

Why why why does everyone say ‘the renew fashion show’. How many fashion shows are happening in Ambridge at the moment that they don’t just say ‘the fashion show’? It’s so clunky and unrealistic. I know I’m overinfested but it’s little things like that ruin it for me. As well as big things like stupid storylines that make no sense 😄

Perhaps the Baddie jumped on the stage to shut Jolene up singing her sea shantys.
Its is a silly story line but isnt that just like TA?.
Well Vince has a great gift of seeing through people to be fair.
Noticed Kenton started gurgling again.
Well we have the Renew Fashion show tonight that should perk everyone up or will there be more danger for the Bull.

I missed it yesterday so listened again in great curiosity over J'lene's Scooby-Doo story.

As I understand it, it seems to be - a man once looked at me, thirty years ago, and now he’s tracked me down to here and things could get baaaaaad.

Well. Yes. It really is that preposterous, isn’t it?

Yes, very baaaaaaad. And instead of speaking to my son in law, who is a police officer, I’m going to rope in the local abattoir owner, because he has the same accent which means he will know him.

And there you have it. Dance hall story was a tissue of lies. It wasn’t A dog, it was Black Dog. Tonight’s cliffhanger will be Blind Pew delivering the Black Spot.

Maybe Kenton will have a peg leg now.

Is this Jolene?

#Brefugee. thats exactly as I would picture Jolene!🤣🤣🤣🏴‍☠️

😂😂

I'm glad you're all as bemused as me. What IS this tripe?!

We may be moving into a phase where the thread is a lot more fun than listening to the programme!

🤣🤣🤣🤣

Thank you all, the Jolene storyline comments have cheered me up no end (currently ill in bed).

Glad I’m not the only one mystified but it all. Her whispered warning to Vince about “evil folk from the Blaaaaacck Coun’ry” really made that scene comedic.

Was a barrel of rum involved?

Just a thought but was jolene meaning... because kenton shusshed them in the pub to announce the longest drinking comp that's why they came back for revenge (ie the equivalent of attacking the bouncer who chucked him off the stage 30?years ago)

I'm still not sure why she thinks she was so memorable that a renound thug from the black country would remember her,

can confirm. I actually stopped listening a few weeks ago. Am not regretting that decision

The only way I can make sense of all of this is to suppose that what Jolene meant was this.

1. Thug(s) came into pub and flashed the cash on Monday. They may have already heard about the electrical problem and thought 'here's a good rendezvous which won't have lights or CCTV in the car park'. (We'll gloss over why they couldn't have met somewhere in a field a long way from houses.)
2. They come back late on Tuesday and meet in the car park. Guard dog attacks Kenton as it would have attacked any other human in the vicinity. They haven't recognised Jolene or made the connection with the previous incident (probably one of many in their thuggish pasts).
3. Jolene, however, did recognise thug on Monday and kept out of the way for fear thug would remember her after 30+ years. I can just about accept this bit, unlikely as it is that the thug would recognise Jolene or make the connection. The thugs made a strong impression on Jolene, and that's plausible, I suppose.
4. Remembering the mayhem unleashed when these thugs were crossed many years ago, Jolene is petrified that if she tells the police that she might know who one of them is that they will come back and burn down The Bull, possibly with her and Kenton inside.

I prefer the loan shark theory, to be honest, but the above seems to be what we're stuck with.

1. They come back late on Tuesday and meet in the car park. Guard dog attacks Kenton as it would have attacked any other human in the vicinity.

The problem with that, as I said above, is that a guard dog who leaves intruders a whimpering heap of bloody flesh causes all the sorts of problems with the police that you’re seeking to avoid. A pub car park in a village is likely to have “intruders”. Their response is to run. But setting up somewhere that you’re likely to have to run doesn’t seem a good plan to me

Well Vince swallowed the whole thing without question, so maybe it's just us that's struggling with this SL.

But of all the SL's that could bring thuggery and misery to the Bull, why would they chose this one. It's so unrealistic.

I do love that the band was touring Wolverhampton. There's nothing wrong with the place but it did add to the completely overblown SL.