💀 Archers thread #132: The Grim Reaper joined the cast; The Bard of Ambridge breathed his last. Discuss The Archers here.

[Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g]

Thank you, @PseudoBadger, for kicking off this long, long series of Archers threads.

All views on The Archers welcome here! New blood welcomed. We don't all agree on all points and most of us are posting tongue in cheek a lot of the time, so don't worry about revealing that you think Shula will make an excellent vicar, or other unusual things.

Spoilers: not on this thread, please! We don't wait for the omnibus to discuss the weeknight episodes, but we do try our best to avoid cross-contamination from www.mumsnet.com/Talk/radio_addicts/4197199--The-Archers-spoilers-thread-6-Cant-wait-for-7-02pm-Join-us-here, where spoilers are positively welcomed.

For newer listeners, lurkers or those who just have no idea what we're talking about, @DadDadDad has created this useful thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/radio_addicts/3557323-For-Archers-fans-a-guide-to-acronyms-on-the-long-running-discussion-threads-and-any-other-meta-thread-questions-you-may-have - BOOP point for him! (See thread for explanation.)

Thanks to many of you for title suggestions. @JanglyBeads said that this thread had to be a Bert tribute so needed a rhyming title. From an excellent field, I chose the suggestion from @BorsetshireBanality (who also has a cracking username).

Check out the last thread for the other suggestions and various poetic offerings inspired by Bert Fry's passing. www.mumsnet.com/Talk/radio_addicts/4349822--Archers-thread-131-A-time-to-plant-a-time-to-reap-Discuss-The-Archers-here

So, who'll get the bungalow? Rex, Stella, Pip? If Rex has to move, will he doss down beside his pigs at Lower Loxley? Or will Rex be a resident at Her Majesty's pleasure, having bumped off Trevor for being the world's most boring man? Now Freddie's on the case, are Russ's days at LL numbered? Will we ever hear Jill again, or was Bert just the first of many older cast members to be dedded?

Over to you!

Glad I wasn’t the only one Gohug!!

@AskingQuestionsAllTheTime

The tree-planting was in February 2019, so I doubt it would be called the Old Orchard.

IIRC this tree planting wasn’t an orchard so much as planting in between other things?

Yes but Dander is a child prodigy.

@StrawberrySquirrelThief

Don’t usually post on here but just listening on catch up and am slightly incredulous about Xander requesting all these things for a special day out! Isn’t he only 2 or 3??

Totally agree. If they haven't been to soft play in so long, its hardly likely he will remember to ask is it.

Also, glad to see I was proved right that Clarrie had a personal item of jewellery she wanted to wear.

@Eastie77Returns

I don’t like Natasha but I feel sorry for her. I also think she’s trying (successfully) to prove that although Tom’s family make a great show of wanting to include her business, the reality is they are extremely inflexible and they will only allow her in if she agrees to everything on their terms.

Pat was horrid, ditto Helen with her sneering remark that Natasha doesn’t “understand how our family works”. I think she does and I hope she runs a mile.

Helen's remark seems very reminiscent of the way in which she told Hayley to bugger off out of the business after John's death. Vile then and vile now. "Doggedly independent" my @rse.

We don't know that Xander said anything - Adam could be using him in some sort of plot to get Jenny to do the childcare on the day out or something.

Adam made it up to make JD feel involved

@ILoveShula

Adam made it up to make JD feel involved

Quite likely. I can imagine a 2 year old asking for Grandma Jenny but not making him promise to ask her.

Granny Jenny. That was what he was reported to have called her. And all the things being done were not said to have been requested by Xander; they were just what was being done for him for a Special Day. I expect it was more along the lines "Granny Jenny come too?" if Xander mentioned her at all.

@AskingQuestionsAllTheTime

Granny Jenny. That was what he was reported to have called her. And all the things being done were not said to have been requested by Xander; they were just what was being done for him for a Special Day. I expect it was more along the lines "Granny Jenny come too?" if Xander mentioned her at all.

That's what I was thinking my grandchildren used to ask 'Nana coming?' when they were that age.

FoxgloveSummers
IIRC this tree planting wasn’t an orchard so much as planting in between other things?

I just checked, and it is described as "1200 mixed saplings". So you're almost certainly right.

Which leads me to think that Bridge Farm only has the Old Orchard, because I never heard mention of any other that I remember. They don't have a panic about picking the apples every year, and they do about almost anything else they produce.

They don't have a panic about picking the apples every year, and they do about almost anything else they produce
Yeah, well. Perhaps they should have panicked a bit more about the ghastly children they were producing. However, I have nothing against their leeks or spuds.

Haha 23Minutes I was thinking that while listening to Jenny and Tony on catch-up. What a mess of horrid ungrateful little shits they have created between them. 🤭

I think the tree planting was mooted (ie insisted on) by tom and Natasha, I’m sure I remember worries about how they’d be able to drive the tractors between them - so I guess it was lines of trees between lines of crops. Sorry, boring I know. It sounded idiotic at the time and has never been mentioned again

Granny Jenny deserves all the sympathy she can get if she has to endure a damp November weekend at the local softplay centre.
Isn't two a bit young to be at softplay (or was I just a bit of a slacker parent)?

@Madcats

Granny Jenny deserves all the sympathy she can get if she has to endure a damp November weekend at the local softplay centre. Isn't two a bit young to be at softplay (or was I just a bit of a slacker parent)?

Babies go to soft play. I'm glad my grandchildren have outgrown that, though, I hated it.

My children are not far off 30 now and soft play was very novel when they were young. We went occasionally for birthday parties or perhaps once in the holidays. I loathed it. Inner circle of hell, what with the noise, overexcited children, older children doing dangerous things around babies and toddlers, other parents ignoring said babies, toddlers and older children, children disappearing into some sort of tunnel thing so you never knew where they were or what they were doing, slight concern about how hygiene, given what children are like, and all topped off by abysmal coffee and extortionate prices. Awful, awful places. And now from what I see elsewhere on MN some parents go routinely every week! All I can say is they must have more patience and better nerves than me.

Ignore that extraneous how. The memory of Kidz Korner or whatever it was called has destroyed my grammar.

Mine are 30s so i have no idea what soft play-is. Is it a sort of maze of tunnels and low climby things and nets and ball pools? If so, ours was a sought-affter birthday party treat which mine still look back on with fondness - “I loved that place”. Whether theyd have felt the same had it been a regular part of keeping them occupied, I don’t know

Yes, that's it. My own children loved it too. It's the experience for the parents that I felt left something to be desired.

Yep, that's it Mere. Mine are 30s too. We went to soft play multiple times, I hated it too. In fact I don't think I have ever seen a MN post about soft play that doesn't mention how awful they are

Soft play was definitely an occasional treat when my kids were growing up, we might go first thing in the school holidays or on an inset day when you got a discount if you arrived before 10am. Nice and quiet then and by the time it was getting busy we were ready to move on. They did at least do a decent cappuccino for me.

We held one birthday party there in which my eldest (3 years older than his brother) managed to give the birthday boy a bloody nose!

Given the choice between going there, a swimming pool or the park to kill some time at the weekend, it came third.

Granny Jenny? Has the oddly precocious Xander got any other? Well apart from Lexi's mum and that of the anonymous ovum.

Wouldn't he just call her Granny?

God, I recall a child’s soft play birthday party about fifteen years ago. All the ‘food’ was bright orange. And every surface seemed hopelessly grimy. Nasty places, indeed. 🤮

(Have name changed, btw.)

@campion

Granny Jenny? Has the oddly precocious Xander got any other? Well apart from Lexi's mum and that of the anonymous ovum.

Wouldn't he just call her Granny?

Granny Jenny was what Adam said.