Tis the season to be jolly, Fallon, Alan, Helen, Lillian; Deck the Hall with boughs of Holly, Lily, Will and Jill, Tilly Button. Celebrate Christmas with The Archers!

[PseudoBadger]

Thanks to SmallLegsOrSmallEggs for this thread title way back in November!

Broken cow - equally plausible. My daughter's bit of lead is being irritatingly slow to melt which she thinks means she is immortal. It's my turn next.

Ruth started the passive aggression virtually as soon as she was off the plane, with that stuff about "You seem to have managed fine without me". And when she said she'd had a lot to think about in NZ, I'm sure it was meant to be full of significance in terms of decisions she's making about the future. I suspect Heatherpet's money is going to go into Ruth's attempts to find herself.

But where can I find some lead (within about 30 feet of my sofa)?

Won't sacrifice my phone, or radio; surely there's a tiny bit in a laptop?

I must know what's going to happen tomorrow. Although, wouldn't my lead only tell my future, not Brookfield's?

Second attempt looked like a ferret. I think this betokens continued good fortune for the Grundy family.

Third (stubborn, didn't want to melt): most like the moon. I think this means Rob is a werewolf.

Now for my attempt.

Daughter made second attempt. This time her lead looked like a fish with a spear through it. Apparently this means silence is her salvation - fat chance of her remaining silent for a year, but Helen might become an elective mute. Or maybe the Farebrethren's next venture will be salmon fishing in the Am.

My effort looked like Concorde. My son says this is triangles which betokens insecurity and loss of secured existence and his Czech friend says the triangle is known to be slightly misogynist. Son (not a TA listener but everyone here gets told what's happening in Ambridge, whether they like it or not) thinks this may mean I am about to run away to New Zealand. Alternatively, it fits very well with Helen again.

That's it, folks. Predictions for 2016 through the means of molten lead are now complete.

(My daughter has observed me typing this and tells me that she fears I am slightly obsessive. Slightly? )

Commendable multi-generational effort Gasp0.

Rob (misogynist) flies off (on a plane) with Ruth in order to get his hands on her inheatherance know that he has spent peggois bounty. ....we can but hope.

Deevid finds happiness with Kirsty.

Excellent divination Gasp0 Maybe we should be asking the talking turkey to predict for us? This is my theory (which is the theory of me and all mine!)

I can't see why Rooth announcing she wants a divorce would be "different from any other soap anniversary". I think she will have come back with a masterplan to revive the business that will coincidentally involve hiring an expert young contract milker and a first class graduate in farming (Matthew and Pip) She doesn't know about Berrow Farm but it's demise will be part of the solution. She will tell David she is back on track and wants to solve their problems and he will coo and bill and it will all be lovely. Can't see how that will be "unlike any other show's anniversary episode ever" unless we get the ghosts of Dan and Doris and Phil coming back to haunt us with farming and life advice for the family??

I'm keeping Helen and Knob on the back burner for 2016 as I think that story still has to grow further.

I too think the demise of Berrow Farm will be the salvation of Brokefailed.

Brine said something about them probably selling off all the equipment "But who would want to buy it?"

Step forward fRoof, clutching Heatherpet's insurance payout.

She will leave Deeevid and set up on her own!!

(loved the lead-based prognostications!)

I'm predicting a difference in form rather than content. They can't really find a story that hasn't been done or predicted - but it ought to be possible to find a way of using the medium of radio to tell a story that we haven't experienced (at least in a soap) before.

It could be just one person speaking (though that's been done on EE).

Would be cool if we were flung 20 years into the future, hearing the Brookfield heirs talking about Mum and Dad's brilliant decision that changed the future of farming, or whatever.

Or Dan (original version) musing on his legacy.

I definitely would not welcome a "conversation" between Heather and Ruth ...

Oh God - let it not be something interactive, with Ruth and David inviting us to vote via our keypads for or against cows.

Ok, so that makes no sense unless you've been reading what SOC has been saying in the papers today ...

Gruach love all the possibilities. Press 1 if you want Helen to fatally bosh Knob over the head with an organic butternut squash. Press 2 if you want Ruth to run off to a commune and smoke weed so that she chills the hell out. Press 3 if you want Joe to move a pig into the front room at Grange Farm.

Also love the iron prophecies. Dh is a blacksmith and he has iron and a forge. I will get him to do this tomorrow.

I am worried about Ed. Without the BL work what money will they haven't? Please let 2016 be an end to Grundy bashing!

Bliadhna Mhath Ur everyone! Thanks for making TA infinitely more enjoyable and unmissable.

Just watching The Third Man. Does anyone know this and remember the scene where ghastly shrill toddler outs our hero? Because that toddler is my exact picture of Henree.

Have still not caught up on what has happened tonight or what SOC has said.

Didn't they do a two hander at one point? Which was mainly Linda, or am I imagining that? But saints preserve us from anything else where the dead speak. That bit with Phil and David was quite bad enough.

Place marking - I need to listen again as its all so surreal.

Toomuchtea Yes, spot on! I love that film and have watched it countless times.

Yes, we had a two hander when Sid and Kathy split up, I believe. Probably on other occasions too, but that's the one I dimly remember.

Joskar, your husband is a blacksmith - are you by any chance an engineer?

Happy New Year Threadsters! (Like hipsters but more stylish ...)

2016 began with disturbing thoughts about the Dumdedum apron and Joskar's DH.

And the very poor Today decision to have the 65th anniversary anticipation covered by someone who didn't appear to have heard the programme and consequently told millions of people that the new episode would be this afternoon.

Morning all and a Happy New Year.

I fear I may start 2016 where I left off 2015 - in a grumble. I don't want a 65th anniversary special. I want an everyday tale of country folk.

Loving the Czech predictions!

I have c&p this from the Archers FB page. Was it one of you? The hopes and frustrations there are very similar to here....

I predict Ruth will call it a day on their marriage and Joe will get a letter from Usha ( hand delivered, natch) explaining that any 94 year old Ferret killer, who has lived in Ambridge since birth, is automatically the owner of Grange Farm!

Happy New Year you country loving folk.
Having a massive catch up as I have been away over Christmas.
And listening to Jill on Desert Island discs in bed, with a cup of tea
(while I nurse my hangover)
Thanks For the entertaining thread esp the molten lead NY predictions.

Happy New Year to all on the thread, and thank you for many hours of happy reading. Just listening to Paddy Greene - Jill - on DID and enjoying it (although Jill as a character I find increasingly difficult to take). She's very larky in RL.

Re. pensions and small businesses - it depends on how much you're paid. I'm a one-person company; I've had to register as an employer but my accountant says I don't have to activate a pension-scheme for myself as an employee because I don't pay myself enough, iyswim.

I've no idea how much the farm shop job would pay; probably over the threshold but still, not very much at all, I'd imagine. Surely not enough for HellRob to exist on as a family, given their outgoings?

X-post with Travelled!

Watched the fantastic Sophie Thompson on stage yesterday and had vague recollection of her being rather good in EE as a step parent alienating and abusing a step child.
Could this be what SOC has in store for Henry?

Happy New Year to all.

Meols That's why I'm always intrigued whether Helen and Tom take a dividend. Most self-employed folk I know are advised by their accountants to pay themselves just a tad more than their tax allowance in wages and take the rest as dividend or drawings.

Will we have a report next NY on whether the molten lead predictions were right?

It's true an idyllic chocolate box country cottage (even if small) would be completely out of the league of one full time farm shop assistant. Rob probably rented the grandest place he could afford on his manager's salary (and Jess' anticipated salary?) and he has expensive hobbies so I don't believe he'd have brought much in savings from Canada.

Stealing, embezzlement, fraud are inevitable if he hopes to maintain their standard of living with a rural, retail job.

The minimum would give a full time worker approx 15K a year so Helen would pay tax on £5K and it would be to her advantage to take the minimum wage and pay a lower rate of tax on drawings. Now it's a job share then both of them fall below the tax threshold.
It's possible that the business has invested heavily in the new shop venture and the directors can't take drawings at the moment in which case £15K can't be covering the household bills after rent is paid.