Is that a ferret in your (Gr)undies or are you just pleased to see me? Discuss The Archers vermin (so many possibilities!) here.

[PseudoBadger]

I'm not sure that ferrets cannot through a thumb sized hole - rats can, and mice can fit through a pen sized hole. But I know the SWs will have researched such a statement carefully

Did anyone hear the continuity announcer just before 7pm? In previewing the upcoming episode, she said "and Rob is feeling the strain - excellent". shock So even the BBC staff can't hide how horrible he is!

There was an episode a few weeks back that ended with some outrageous PA act by Rob (can't remember which - so many to choose from). As the dum-de-dum music ended, the announcer said, "I know, I know…."

After Sunday nights' chat between Tom and Knob, mr. continuity said " I just know that he wears a cloak with a red lining..."

Clarkson swinging wildly is pure genius :)

I'm hoping that it's a good sign that Helen told Tom she didn't know what to think about the shop at the moment. There was a time when she'd have been apologising to Knob and saying no, she realised he was right and she just didn't know why she ever thought otherwise.

Plus, he has played this on the basis of "Poor, insecure me, I don't want this because it might take you away from me". With any luck she'll work out that there is no reason why her working in the shop would in itself have that effect, whereas being tied to the kitchen certainly could.

Just listening at work on catch up. Note the food coming into play again, "what's for dinner, is there pudding?" do you think he is trying to, (excuse the expression) fatten her up so she gets all insecure about her weight again?

He's so brilliantly awful, it is very well done.

By my reckoning we are on day five post test so expecting the results by the end of the week??

The food obsession seems to be more about what he is served for his three squares a day rather than what Helen eats. It's supposed to be plentiful, on time and elaborate. If Helen is under pressure when she works it's because Rob won't compromise on his requirements and because preparing these meals must torture her given her own insecurities. His food requirements also reinforce the idea that he's the bread-winner and so must be well fed at all times.

As I've said before, he's possibly more unbalanced than she is and the 'You keep me sane,' statement seems to be almost an admission on his part as well as being manipulative.

I have no idea what he'll do when or if the test result turns out positive. Maybe demand custody of the child to spite Jess?

OTOH, if the test is negative then his virility is in question and he'll be dead set on getting Helen up the duff toute suite so he's feeding her up like prime breeding stock.

IMO the bullying of a dc by BOTH parents\carers is sickening actually, Helen has issues with food and she and knob are doing their best to make sure that Henry will have the same.

WipsGlitter

I suspect we're heading for a Friday night cliffhanger, that'd be 8 days post test, nicely in the 7-10 range quoted by dear Doc Locke

Was anyone else wondering how it would take "another" half hour to finish the sausage and mash. Doesn't the whole thing take like 20 minutes? Sounds to me like she hadn't started til he came back because she was so angry.

I think having Tom back has made her braver, she's less isolated now and the siblings have got a lot in common like being a pain in terms of enterprising spirit.

On a related note, is there a man or boy in Ambridge who regularly cooks a bloody meal?? I'm fed up with Jill, Ruth, Jenny, Kate, Shula and Helen cooking nearly every blooming episode.

Here's my theory about the test results. He'll lie and then Charlie will let it slip. Or he won't lie but tell Hellin that Jess must have stolen his sperm. And she'll believe him.

I appreciate that's far fetched it so is the fact that she had an affair with a married man which the whole village has conveniently overlooked

I fear for Henry, is he planning to replace him?

Elephants When Ruth and David were first married (...) she pointed out, rather forcefully, that she was a farmer not just a farmer's wife and that after fifteen hours in the lambing shed she expected more than a curled up sandwich from the back of the fridge. So for a while I think we did intermittently hear David doing something in the kitchen or explicating on the world beating effort he had been to to provide her with a hot meal. But they don't seem to do that any more.

I sure Alan used to cook. Ian doesn't count ... I give up.

is there a man or boy in Ambridge who regularly cooks a bloody meal??

You mean just for their own family, presumably, so not counting Ian and IIRC Robert was in charge of the B&B breakfasts.

Well Roy lived on takeaways after Hayley left.

Alan cooks regularly. David can cook spaghetti bolognese, because he was doing that the night Ruth drove to Oxford to meet Sam and chickened out. Brian can make toasted cheese on the Aga, because he did it for Alice once.

Given that Jim lives alone (usually) presumably he can do something in the kitchen. Christine may keep him supplied with baking, I suppose.

Deeavid was cooking - think it was spag bol - when Roooth nearly ran off with Sam and his platemeter.

Snap Gasp0de

because he was doing that the night Ruth drove to Oxford to meet Sam

Gasp0de that is a whole new level of infestment.

Another for you BOW.

That's quite mild for me, Zero! I think I recall that he was adding mushrooms to the sauce and described that as his secret weapon, or something!

It wasn't merely 'spag bol', it was his 'signature ragu'.

Bet Jean-Paul whipped up an amuse-bouche or two on his day off.......

I'm sure every Ambridge man has wooed his love with a meal. And then never set foot in the kitchen again.

Didn't Will produce baked beans for Emma in the Dower House flat? I distinctly recall Caroline exclaiming that she hadn't eaten baked beans for years. At the time I felt unusually content with life but her comment cast rather a pall over my kitchen.

Poor Caroline! I love baked beans.

Errol, do you have a nerd badge too?