I’d really appreciate some outside perspectives because I feel completely torn.
We currently live in a large bungalow in a semi-rural village in Kent. Over the last few years we’ve completely renovated and extended it, spending £250k plus on top of what we paid for the house. It’s now exactly how we wanted it; four bedrooms, large open-plan kitchen/living space, lovely garden, loads of privacy and some genuinely beautiful views over the countryside (I’ll attach a photo of the view).
The problem is… the location.
We have two young children, and increasingly I’m wondering whether we’re entering a stage of life where lifestyle matters more than the house itself.
Where we are now, you have to drive everywhere. If we fancy a coffee, we drive. Pub? Drive. Park? Drive. Taking the dog out? Drive. The boys can’t just hop on their bikes to meet friends or wander into town when they’re older. It all has to be planned.
One of the biggest frustrations is that although we live in a beautiful setting, we’re on a fast A-road. Our house is set well back behind gates and mature screening, so we don’t really hear the traffic in the house or garden, but it means we can’t simply walk out of the front door. The pavements are either tiny or non-existent in places, so even a casual stroll into a village, coffee shop or pub isn’t really possible.
I’ve started looking at places like Tunbridge Wells because I love the idea of walking out of the front door to independent cafés, parks, restaurants, the station, shops and clubs for the children. I imagine evening walks to get an ice cream, Saturday mornings wandering into town, the boys becoming more independent as teenagers, and generally feeling more connected to where we live.
The other attraction is the secondary schools. There seem to be several highly regarded state and grammar options in and around Tunbridge Wells, whereas where we are the choices feel more limited.
But then I look around our house and think… are we mad?
It’s taken years to create this home. The garden is exactly as we wanted, the house works brilliantly for family life, it’s peaceful and private despite the road, and the view still makes visitors stop and say “wow.” It’s also big enough that our boys will have space as they grow and we aren’t all on top of each other.
I’d describe it as like an island, very safe and private but life is contained within the boundary fences. I grew up in surburbia and didn’t realise how nice it was having the freedom to walk everywhere growing up.
I’m also conscious that perhaps we’re suffering from familiarity blindness, because we see the view every day, maybe we’ve stopped appreciating just how special it actually is. Would we only realise what we’d lost after we’d moved?
Financially we’d almost certainly end up with a less unique smaller house, a smaller garden and less privacy in order to gain the walkable location. I think we’d be lucky to break even and most likely we’d be down about 50k on what we’ve spent after fees etc.
Has anyone made a similar move?
Did moving to a walkable town genuinely improve everyday family life, or did the novelty wear off after a while? Equally, has anyone left a house they loved for the location and regretted it?
I’d really welcome honest opinions from people who’ve been in a similar position.