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Original poster

New neighbours asked if they could take my fence down

467 replies

ellogov · 20/02/2026 18:22

Around two years ago, I put up a fence to divide my driveway from my neighbours. I made sure it was entirely on my side, not intruding on their area at all. The reason behind this was that they kept using my side to move their cars around, and they, along with their guests, would walk up and down my side to get around their vehicles all the time. They weren’t thrilled about it, but I was already doing some renovations, so I used that as my excuse. I never actually told them the real reason, though I have a feeling they figured it out. The driveways are pretty narrow, but that’s just how they were constructed. I had mine widened last year, so it’s much better now.

They moved out in September. New neighbours moved in just before Christmas, and they seem nice. I’ve chatted with them a few times, asking how they’re settling in. This morning, they asked how I’d feel about taking the fence down. They mentioned it’s because they don’t have much space and offered to pay for its removal. I’m a bit torn on what to do. While they seem friendly, I’m concerned they might end up being like the previous neighbours. If they’re really in need of more space, they could always pay to widen their side, and even though they’ve offered to cover the removal costs, it doesn’t compensate for the money I spent putting it up last year, and I’d have to pay again to put up another one if they start taking advantage of the situation.

What do you think? Should I say no sorry and keep them separate?

OP posts:
Pryceosh1987 · 22/02/2026 01:02

Say sorry and keep them separate. They have no business altering your plans. You got there first. It is good to have literal boundaries with others. They are more likely to damage your property if you do not have the fence there.

Sowhat12345 · 22/02/2026 01:17

ellogov · 20/02/2026 18:22

Around two years ago, I put up a fence to divide my driveway from my neighbours. I made sure it was entirely on my side, not intruding on their area at all. The reason behind this was that they kept using my side to move their cars around, and they, along with their guests, would walk up and down my side to get around their vehicles all the time. They weren’t thrilled about it, but I was already doing some renovations, so I used that as my excuse. I never actually told them the real reason, though I have a feeling they figured it out. The driveways are pretty narrow, but that’s just how they were constructed. I had mine widened last year, so it’s much better now.

They moved out in September. New neighbours moved in just before Christmas, and they seem nice. I’ve chatted with them a few times, asking how they’re settling in. This morning, they asked how I’d feel about taking the fence down. They mentioned it’s because they don’t have much space and offered to pay for its removal. I’m a bit torn on what to do. While they seem friendly, I’m concerned they might end up being like the previous neighbours. If they’re really in need of more space, they could always pay to widen their side, and even though they’ve offered to cover the removal costs, it doesn’t compensate for the money I spent putting it up last year, and I’d have to pay again to put up another one if they start taking advantage of the situation.

What do you think? Should I say no sorry and keep them separate?

Absolutely not. Say politely that you've paid a lot of money to have the fence put up the year before and suggest if they haven't got enough room then they can widen the driveway like you've had to. Due to their reasons for wanting it removed they will absolutely be coming on to your land and you will be in the same boat as before

echt · 22/02/2026 02:38

@Misswendy62, not sure you're on the right thread.

Friendlygingercat · 22/02/2026 03:20

An earlier PP had suggested stating that the fence was erected because of a boundary dispute. I would leave it a few days and then drop a very formal letter next doo expaining this, Accordingly you had consulted your solicitor who advised leaving the fence in place for legal reasons. This should come as a bit of a frightener to your cheeky neighbours if they think there had already been a boundary issue involving legal action. Mention of solicitors usually warns chancers to back down or it could get expensive. I would point out very strongly that the fence was already in place when they made plans to purchase. Therefore you will not be prepared to discuss this matter again going forward. Any attempt to do so will result in the matter being forwarded it to your legal advisor for further action.

Chickadee001 · 22/02/2026 05:09

Leave it as it is -give them the details of the company you used to widen yours and suggest they may want to do it too!

custardcreme77 · 22/02/2026 06:15

Keep your lovely fence, OP.

Just think - if you were to remove the fence to appease your new neighbours - then they sold and moved on at some point, the incoming ‘new’ neighbours might be similar to your previous neighbours which necessitated you erecting your fence in the first place…

Glittertwins · 22/02/2026 06:59

Anyway, the new neighbours would have seen the fence at the time the house was for sale and then bought it knowing it was in place. They should have factored that in for their own driveway and needs before requesting the neighbour removes something on her property for them.

Evan456 · 22/02/2026 07:43

You don’t need to explain anything! The fence is staying, just tell them to widen their side, you don’t need to say about boundary disputes or anything else! Tough if they don’t want to do it

echt · 22/02/2026 07:49

Evan456 · 22/02/2026 07:43

You don’t need to explain anything! The fence is staying, just tell them to widen their side, you don’t need to say about boundary disputes or anything else! Tough if they don’t want to do it

There was no boundary dispute. Read the OP's posts.

SpaceRaccoon · 22/02/2026 08:10

"We've not that long put it un, it was expensive, and I'm pleased with it, so I'll be keeping it.
It's been so much easier since we had our driveway widened, I'd definitely recommend that."

Jellybean23 · 22/02/2026 08:39

Say no. By implication, they are saying they want to use some of your space and you’ll be back to square one.

1apenny2apenny · 22/02/2026 09:01

Honestly OP you know why they want to take it down! They will then start using your drive/land and you'll get annoyed and then have to put the fence back up - more money and, no doubt, a falling out with them.

There is absolutely no obligation on your part to tell
them why it’s there and why you won’t take it down. It’s very easy, if they ask you say you won’t be taking it down as you like the privacy it affords you, end of conversation.

Evan456 · 22/02/2026 09:10

echt · 22/02/2026 07:49

There was no boundary dispute. Read the OP's posts.

Show quote history

Yes I know!! Someone has said to tell them that’s why she had the fence put up!

Gettingbysomehow · 22/02/2026 09:17

Bloody hell just say no and stop saying sorry.
I once went over to my neighbours at 4 in the morning to tell him to stop chain smoking all night right next to my bedroom. I just couldnt stand it being kept up all night by the stink and knackered for work.
He hasnt smoked in the house since.
Its your land and your fence. Tell them to bugger off.

Missj25 · 22/02/2026 09:40

Mumteedum · 20/02/2026 18:28

Cheeky buggers!

Yes , this exactly.
It’s very forward of them to ask .
They viewed house , saw your fence & decided this is the house that they would like to have, so 🤷🏻‍♀️.
You will 💯 have same problem again if you take down your fence .
I can’t get past that they even asked you being honest OP .

masterblastermama · 22/02/2026 10:02

I had the same issue and it was my neighbour who put up the fence when the previous owner had died. Problem was it was a shared drive so even though we had our "boundaries" it was shared, so had to be removed. Providing it's not a shared drive I would keep the fence up.

NamingNoNames · 22/02/2026 10:10

@Pryceosh1987 ,what is OP meant to be sorry for?

Sorry NDN for not being obliging when you made a pushy request?

ensayers · 22/02/2026 11:26

I have a drive that we share with neighbours, as do all the houses on this street. There's one house with a fence down the middle and that apparently was put up because when one family parked on their own side, they then had to STEP onto the other sides half of the drive. The driveways are equal width on both sides, but if two cars parked next to each other theres only about 8" between, just enough room for one car to pass the other.
The old woman that put the fence up now parks on the street instead and the young family next door can only use the doors on the drivers side. It was a petty thing to do that hasnt benefitted either of them

godmum56 · 22/02/2026 11:39

ensayers · 22/02/2026 11:26

I have a drive that we share with neighbours, as do all the houses on this street. There's one house with a fence down the middle and that apparently was put up because when one family parked on their own side, they then had to STEP onto the other sides half of the drive. The driveways are equal width on both sides, but if two cars parked next to each other theres only about 8" between, just enough room for one car to pass the other.
The old woman that put the fence up now parks on the street instead and the young family next door can only use the doors on the drivers side. It was a petty thing to do that hasnt benefitted either of them

Presumably the person who put the fence up thinks it did benefit her?

Calm33 · 22/02/2026 11:58

NO NO NO - You have put up the fence due to your good reasons, paid for it so just leave it there.
People are always nice, they have not been there that long so you do not really know them.
Best to keep things friendly and just say no it suits you being up, dont give reasons say its just up.
Less said sooner mended.

FielderSoprano · 22/02/2026 12:13

@ellogov Do they have a massive SUV type vehicle ?

WhatAboutThisUser · 22/02/2026 12:47

I would ignore it. If they ask again they are cheeky and brazen af no matter how nice and breezy they sound.

‘My fence is fully in my land, and I will be keeping it.’

If they mention the lack of space, ‘yes but my fence doesn’t affect your space, because it’s all on my land’.

They’re the ones making things awkward so don’t be afraid to leave an awkward silence!

Don’t mention the other neighbours taking liberties, as then you’re implying you think they’ll do the same as they might try to manipulate/guilt you over that.

Retiredfromearlyyears · 22/02/2026 13:34

Absolutely not! Keep your fence. The new neighbours will get over it and if they dont ,well,you'll have their measure.

7238SM · 22/02/2026 14:18

Any update OP???

Aiming4Optimistic · 22/02/2026 17:24

I never understand threads like these - you'd have to be a complete doormat to even consider taking down your fence. It's perfectly obvious to everyone, you included OP, that they want to use your space. Why do so many people lack the ability to say an outright no to blatant cheeky fuckery?