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No dining room, just a table in the kitchen?

131 replies

Clementiness · 01/12/2023 09:02

FTB in expensive SE. Many properties within our budget seem to have a smallish living room/front room and then a dining area in the kitchen, rather than a separate room. Is it weird to have all family meals, including Xmas in the kitchen? I always had a dining room so feels strange but maybe it’s just me?
Would you consider this type of layout?
Space in the kitchen is enough to sit 6 people comfortably, 8 stretching a bit (but almost never have 8 people as it’s usually DH, DC and I + a couple of guests max)

OP posts:
Gudrunnn · 01/12/2023 16:23

We used to have a house with a kitchen-diner and also a dining room.

The dining room only got used on special occasions like Christmas or dinner parties. It was a waste of the space, to be honest; we hardly ever even went in there. The rest of the time we ate in the kitchen-diner. It was great, especially with young kids - they can be getting on with craft activities or homework at the kitchen table and you can keep an eye on them while you're cooking or clearing up. Plus you're not carrying food and dishes around from one room to another.

housethatbuiltme · 01/12/2023 18:42

I HATE kitchen diners with a passion but I also think a dining room is a MASSIVE waste of space.

We use our 2 receptions rooms as a living room and a family/play room.

Most my friends do not have a dining room or kitchen/diner, millions have just a living room and kitchen (I did in my old 2 up, 2 down).

Callisto1 · 01/12/2023 19:07

Where I come from dinning rooms don't exist in normal houses. All eating/socializing happens in the kitchen. I mean who has the time for formal dining these days. Seems a lot of bother to carry all the stuff through to a separate room for 30 mins of eating. And then have to clear it all up after.

BombaySamphire · 01/12/2023 19:10

housethatbuiltme · 01/12/2023 18:42

I HATE kitchen diners with a passion but I also think a dining room is a MASSIVE waste of space.

We use our 2 receptions rooms as a living room and a family/play room.

Most my friends do not have a dining room or kitchen/diner, millions have just a living room and kitchen (I did in my old 2 up, 2 down).

Do you have a table in your kitchen?

CasperGutman · 01/12/2023 19:14

We used to have a dining room but knocked through and extended so we now have a large kitchen diner. We still have two other reception rooms, so we could have a dining room if we wanted to, but we choose to have a big, sociable space with the table in the kitchen.

A kitchen dining room isn't an inferior arrangement to a separate dining room, just different. There are pros and cons either way, yes, but on balance you may find you prefer this way even if it's not what you've been used to.

pinkspeakers · 01/12/2023 19:16

I barely know anyone with a separate dining room these days, even in very big expensive houses. Seems very old fashioned! Of course, if the kitchen is not really big enough for the number of people you would like to sit then it won't work, but otherwise it seems like a much better, nicer use of space than a separate room.

pinkspeakers · 01/12/2023 19:18

housethatbuiltme · 01/12/2023 18:42

I HATE kitchen diners with a passion but I also think a dining room is a MASSIVE waste of space.

We use our 2 receptions rooms as a living room and a family/play room.

Most my friends do not have a dining room or kitchen/diner, millions have just a living room and kitchen (I did in my old 2 up, 2 down).

I'm confused. How can you hate kitchen diners with a passion but also think a dining room is a massive waste of space? Where do you eat? I guess maybe the alternative is a living/dining room (which I'm really not keen on personally) but you don't say that!

96waystobehappy · 01/12/2023 19:20

I find dining rooms a bit naff. People seem to use them for clothes airers and Christmas Day! I’m my experience they are wasted space. I can’t imagine trying to get everyone into a dining room to eat an average dinner. I find them a bit quiet , old fashioned and soulless.

pinkspeakers · 01/12/2023 19:21

Flubadubba · 01/12/2023 13:03

I think the issue here is London. There are a lot of houses outside of London with a separate dining room, but in a city where space is at a premium, it makes more sense to many people to have a multifunctional space rather than a dedicated one- you get much more use from it.

Nope. Live in a village in SE but still can barely think of anyone with a separate dining room. Not even people with 3000+ sq feet. Some of the houses did have them, but almost all are now converted.

BombaySamphire · 01/12/2023 19:21

“trying to get everyone in” to a dining room? Eh?

96waystobehappy · 01/12/2023 19:25

“trying to get everyone in” to a dining room? Eh?

The kids I meant. “Come on children, dinner is served in the dining room”
It would just be weird for my family, too quiet and formal. I just picture them
as having little bottle green table cloths and cork backed placemats!

Im actually sitting in my Mums house right now that has a dining room. It’s a bit more modern but never gets used. It’s in a weird place so can’t really be much else.

Cantbeardarknights · 01/12/2023 19:29

I got rid of mine about 6 years ago as I only used it a couple of times a tlyear and had a massive kitchen diner: I made it into a tv room

GOODCAT · 01/12/2023 19:29

At our first house we had a tiny kitchen and a living room with no space for any table in either room.

When we moved to our current house we had a room between the kitchen and living room that could have been used as a dining room. We knocked out through to make a kitchen diner. We would never have used it other than as a corridor/ dumping ground otherwise. Even now it still is and we only really use a kitchen and living room. We only use the table if we have visitors.

TheSandHurtsMyFeelings · 01/12/2023 19:30

Both of the houses I lived in growing up had separate dining rooms, but were really only ever used for dinner parties or on Christmas Day. When ds was first born, we rented a house with a separate dining room and I genuinely don't remember ever using it, not once.

When we bought this house, a.kitchen diner was on my list of non-negotiables. It's so much better and more useful than a separate dining room. (But NOT open plan to fhe sitting room!)

housethatbuiltme · 01/12/2023 19:32

BombaySamphire · 01/12/2023 19:10

Do you have a table in your kitchen?

No we have a galley kitchen, most houses round here do.

I like most people I know (most my friends live in flats or old 2 up, 2 down terraces) have a small fold down leaf table in the corner of the living room.

Ours is very similar to this:

https://furniture123.co.uk/p/navy-and-pine-space-saving-dining-table-and-chairs-seats-4-santos-400-401-258?refsource=fuadwords&utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_id=20077049916&gad_source=1&gclid=CjwKCAiApaarBhB7EiwAYiMwqge-S18jMOhGh-1M7wouc55g6px1q5bb7Mu5j3TtvQFGjr6fh2n5ERoC1v0QAvD_BwE

My mam had a dining room with big table but it never got used. I knew someone with a breakfast nook in the kitchen that also never got used so they ripped it out, that was the closest thing to a kitchen diner I have known someone have. Its weird to sit an eat in the kitchen.

Navy and Pine Drop Leaf Table Set with 4 Chairs - Seats 4 - Santos - Furniture123

Buy Navy and Pine Drop Leaf Table Set with 4 Chairs - Seats 4 - Santos from Furniture123 - the UK's leading online furniture and bed store

https://furniture123.co.uk/p/navy-and-pine-space-saving-dining-table-and-chairs-seats-4-santos-400-401-258?gad_source=1&gclid=CjwKCAiApaarBhB7EiwAYiMwqge-S18jMOhGh-1M7wouc55g6px1q5bb7Mu5j3TtvQFGjr6fh2n5ERoC1v0QAvD_BwE&refsource=fuadwords

MissingMoominMamma · 01/12/2023 19:33

I spend most of my time in our kitchen diner. It has sofas and a log burner.

housethatbuiltme · 01/12/2023 19:35

pinkspeakers · 01/12/2023 19:18

I'm confused. How can you hate kitchen diners with a passion but also think a dining room is a massive waste of space? Where do you eat? I guess maybe the alternative is a living/dining room (which I'm really not keen on personally) but you don't say that!

we don't have a dining room or combined dining room at all.

Mumsnet are aware they are luxuries not requirements right?

blackrabbitwhiterabbit · 01/12/2023 19:35

What about all the Victorian terraces? They usually have a dining room. My past 3 houses have had one and the house doesn't have to be 'massive'!

pinkspeakers · 01/12/2023 19:39

housethatbuiltme · 01/12/2023 19:35

we don't have a dining room or combined dining room at all.

Mumsnet are aware they are luxuries not requirements right?

Ok, so no dining table? You just eat off your laps? OK I do understand that some people don't have space for a dining table. But I wouldn't expect those people to say that hate kitchen diners with a passion as I'd think they might quite like a kitchen that was big enough for a dining table if they currently have a small kitchen.

InTheRainOnATrain · 01/12/2023 19:39

blackrabbitwhiterabbit · 01/12/2023 19:35

What about all the Victorian terraces? They usually have a dining room. My past 3 houses have had one and the house doesn't have to be 'massive'!

They’ve been knocked through. Double reception room to the front, kitchen with side return extension to the rear.

SleepingStandingUp · 01/12/2023 19:40

housethatbuiltme · 01/12/2023 19:35

we don't have a dining room or combined dining room at all.

Mumsnet are aware they are luxuries not requirements right?

But you do know that the kids not eating at a formally set dining table will turn them into wildlings who fling food at each at school and is practically No1 on the signs of neglect lost? According to MN anyway.

BombaySamphire · 01/12/2023 19:42

housethatbuiltme · 01/12/2023 19:35

we don't have a dining room or combined dining room at all.

Mumsnet are aware they are luxuries not requirements right?

But people have to eat somewhere, so it’s a perfectly valid question.

KaiserChefs · 01/12/2023 19:42

romatheroamer · 01/12/2023 16:17

They wouldn't have been built like this though, most smaller houses would have had the kitchen in the back extension or beside the dining room (20s/30s semis). The kitchen was for cooking, not sitting down. Not all have been knocked through, I've seen quite a few on RM (at London prices!) with galley kitchens where it's through one or two doors to get to the table.

Actually this isn't true. There are a range of styles but what is now the kitchen/diner in 20s/30s houses is achieved by removing the wall between what was usually the bathroom next to the kitchen (not toilet, that was separate and often had a door facing outside) as upstairs plumbing is a fairly recent thing. Fitted kitchens weren't invented until later. So when the bathroom was moved upstairs, the wall would often be retained and used to separate a kitchen (where the bathroom used to be) and dining space (where the kitchen used to be).

In the pre-1910 houses, the whole back aspect would have been the kitchen/diner in a 2 up 2 down because it was a working class house and working class people didn't have or need a separate dining room. They would have spent all their days in the back room and the front room was usually the parlour for if the vicar visited (or, it would start life as a parlour and end up as the place where a chronically ill person e.g. a widowed ill MIL or a child with TB would be installed pre-NHS).

In a house with a rear projection (not an extension; they were built like this to enable the middle room to have windows), the back room would be the kitchen, the middle was the dining room and the front room was the parlour, and the dining room would be where the family would hang out between work and sleep.

In slum houses built in a similar style to these (and largely cleared these days but you still occasionally find one in a bad state somewhere) none of the rooms would have had running water, kitchens or bathrooms, people cooked on the fire in the room they slept in, and all of them would have contained at least one family.

If you're interested, the house in Peepo shows the layout of the traditional three-up three-down (as it was used in the 1940s) quite well. But often in working class houses, the kitchen/diner was the only place to sit down (on straight-backed chairs, around the table where you also rolled out your bread etc for cooking, although of course you'd stand up for that to leverage your body weight)!

That changed after WWII when the social class divides started to break down and working class people were less beholden to others, but even up to the 70s or 80s some people maintained a parlour and a kitchen/diner in a two-up two-down.

If you think about the things you'd need to actually cook in a kitchen before fitted kitchens and appliances were invented, you can see easily how much more space a kitchen would need to take up.

housethatbuiltme · 01/12/2023 19:44

pinkspeakers · 01/12/2023 19:39

Ok, so no dining table? You just eat off your laps? OK I do understand that some people don't have space for a dining table. But I wouldn't expect those people to say that hate kitchen diners with a passion as I'd think they might quite like a kitchen that was big enough for a dining table if they currently have a small kitchen.

Why would I want to sit and eat in my kitchen?

Where I just cooked and its either cold (breakfast time etc...) or steamy and smelly with piles of dishes/pans that need washing, maybe with the washer or dryer running etc... I'm not a Victorian chamber maid.

Growing up if someone went to eat in the kitchen it was a sign that a guest had overstayed their welcome and meant a swift 'fuck off'.

sweetpickle23 · 01/12/2023 19:45

Is it an open plan layout, or have they just plonked a dining table in the kitchen? I’ve seen the latter a lot lately and wouldn’t be for me- I like to entertain/have dinner parties and people sat in the room while I’m running around with all the mess in the kitchen would stress me out.

Actual open plan, where kitchen and dining room are all in the same overall knocked through space is different I think.